


The Enigma Effect

by AwatereJones, meretrixvilis



Series: Time Traveller Verse [3]
Category: Torchwood
Genre: Action, Alt Verse, Arguments, Cats, Drama, Family, Fem/Ianto, Humor, M/M, Mpreg, Suspense, Tears, Time Ianto, Time Travel, dr who
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-06
Updated: 2017-06-20
Packaged: 2018-09-15 08:40:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 96
Words: 87,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9227060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AwatereJones/pseuds/AwatereJones, https://archiveofourown.org/users/meretrixvilis/pseuds/meretrixvilis
Summary: So TYTNW is now over and things can get back to normal ...right? Right? Um...OK?The power push needed to save Piney was done at a cost which is still being metered out as Ianto finds things harder to bounce back from and soon he won't be able to bouce at all.If you've not read Part 1 or 2 ...this will not make sense.For those that have, welcome back to the story.





	1. Chapter 1

The cabin was silent, the snow falling outside making their bubble complete and Ianto stood silent and fragile in the first light of the new day.

Jack shifted in the bed and sighed softly as he reached for his mate and found cold pillows.

"Yan?" Jack slurred as he sat up, rubbing his face and he looked over at his love, seeing the male form looking back.

"Ianto? Come back to bed darling, its cold" Jack pouted and Ianto nodded, banking the fire and slipping in to Jack's arms.

"See? You're freezing" Jack huffed, rubbing his back as he kissed his neck and jaw as Ianto sighed and relaxed against him.

"Sometimes I wonder if I will ever be warm again" Ianto said softly, closing his eyes against the flames, licking around the wood like they might the world once more.

"Our wee Byrdie still snoring?" Jack changed the subject as he missed their wee hottie and Ianto hummed.

"I worried about her travelling, she took to it well though" Jack said innocently, "She will probably be quite the traveller when she is older."

"Once she gets her hands on the Tardis she is going to be a bloody cow to control" Ianto muttered softly as he nuzzled against Jack's neck and Jack frowned at the strange comment, then shrugged it off.

Finally Ianto sighed and rolled to the edge of the bed and rose, padding through to the kitchen and returning with some packets of crisps as Jack crowed, "What about crumbs?"

"I am craving these like nobody's business" Ianto replied, "Gods, I love salt and vinegar!"

Jack watched with awe as Ianto proceeded to devour the entire bag as well as a one litre bottle of cola like a pro. Burping and flopping back with a grunt of satisfaction.

"Wow!" Jack laughed, "You really do love salt and vinegar!"

"You" Ianto whispered so softly that Jack almost missed it as he settled in the bed, "I love you. More than everything, anything, all things."

"Awwww, you have woken soppy sweetling" Jack crooned, leaning over to kiss him and rub his chest, enjoying that soft chest hair.

"Jack" Ianto said calmly, "We promised no more secrets, that where and when there was a convergence it should be recognised and then let go. Move on. Right?"

"Yeah?" Jack frowned, "But …what. There is not fixed point here babe."

"No, not here. There. Then, we had to do some bad things and we had to act fast …even if it took a year to accomplish. It was just now. While you were asleep, it was my page written in the book" Ianto whispered as he looked at his handsome man and watched the myriad of emotions that flickered across his face.

"I …I don't understand, what the hell are you talking about?" Jack demanded and Ianto sighed.

"I bent the rules, I had to for our Byrd. Her husband was … well. Cant' say, Spoilers. But let's say he is lovely and I had to save him, his death would not have served and I had to take one for the team in order to get him out of Dodge" Ianto grimaced, "Oh Jack. The things I did for you, to you. I … I became who I needed to be to get the job done but …I am so tired, so bloody tired."

Jack held him tightly as he tried to understand what was happening, what he meant but he couldn't for the life of him work out what Ianto meant.

Then he felt Ianto change, and smiled as he loosed his hold to look down at Yan, only to find someone else in the bed.

Someone he had not seen in a lifetime.

"India?"

"Hello Cariad" she whispered, "I didn't blink once."

"Oh gods" Jack sobbed as the year came back with sickening clarity, his jailor, confidant, fellow activist.

"I'm sorry" she sobbed clutching at him, "I had to. Byrd was out there doing her part, I had to keep her safe and … gods, the timelines were so messy, I was so scared."

Jack crushed her to his chest as his heart threatened to explode, the realisation that the one he had thanked for keeping him sane in a time of insanity had been his love.

"Ianto …when you died at my feet I …."

"It was that time's Ianto. I came to you to try and comfort you when I could, I …when you thought I was an angel I couldn't crush you, I couldn't admit that it was me. Gods, how I wanted to tell you it was all going to work." She was sobbing, her own heart so broken as he crushed his mouth to hers, kissing her with al he had.

"You saved me" he said as he broke apart from her, "You! Your touches, kind words, updates, goddess the smell of Ianto. Of course I could smell him. It was you!" Jack laughed as he lay there, unable to fully comprehend the wibbly-wobbly mess.

"Wait. Byrd, she was there? What?" Jack sat up with horror as he looked at his lovely wee bub, "What do you mean, her husband! She's married?"

"She is all grown up with her own life, came back to do her part in the Great Game" India confirmed, then pulled at him to come back down.

"Sweetheart, I love you but …" he pulled a face and she nodded, letting Yan emerge and Jack relaxed as he held his love again.

"So, you clever thing. You learnt to mimic." He smiled, "It just happened for you? Really?"

"Yes. No. I took a wee trip with Byrd and her crew to an Alt Verse, she wouldn't let me back until she was sure I was strong enough" Yan answered, "Gods I missed you."

"My love" Jack held her tightly, "I want to make love to you, I want to make you full of my love. Let's put it all away, leave it screwed up in the trash where it all belongs and just be together, safe and whole."

"Tell you what" Yan prodded at him. "Pull that copper bath over by the fire and fill it with hot water so I can wash off the filth of memory and I will gladly reconnect with you while our little girl has her sleep after her feed."

"Deal!"

Jack rose and started to move the bath, waking Byrd who had slept too long anyway and Yan rose to collect her, remembering the woman who had defiantly stared her down.

"Listen here you" she said softly, "I'm the boss here. Right?"

Byrd's grin was so familiar.

"Wee bugger!" Yan huffed.


	2. Deja Vu?

The bath was bliss and Yan found herself sighing with pleasure as Jack massaged her foot, grinning from the other end of the bath.

Byrd was fast asleep in her little Moses basket as the two in the bath tub reconnected, Jack knew whatever scars will have flipped away with each transformation, as did his resurrections and he imagined them instead, kissing each section of exposed skin with reverence as more memories bled through.

Yan kept her eyes closed as she tried to let it all go, bleed away into the water, reclaim this time, this place.

She became aware of Jack's fingers, stroking her inner thigh and sighed softly as he slide her into his lap, his lips finding her pulse point as he kissed her neck.

She slid onto him so easily, like the final coming home and she let her head fall back as he filled her with love.

His hands were everywhere, soothing and washing, smoothing the creases of time and claiming every last inch of her with every last inch of himself.

She opened herself and gave herself to him, to the void tht they created in this space and time.

Yan was rocking, making the water splash softly against the sides as she clung to him, whispering his name reverently as she rode his waves of lust and his own soft grunted replies urged her on.

Then she was being lifted out of the water with the power of his thrusts, his cried hoarse as he filled her with cum, and she found herself wrapping her body around him as if creating a womb in the water.

They lay gasping and calming as the water lapped gentler, and gentler until it was still.

"Wow" Jack finally whispered and she hummed happily as she leaned back to climb off, feeling the fatigue catch up with her and as she stumbled to the bed and sat on the towelling robe while drying herself with a towel Jack stood and stepped from the bath with that timeless grace he sometimes displayed.

They spooned, naked and beloved with limbs tangled and breaths combining.

Home.

Next morning Yan stretched and looked over to where the baby was still asleep beside her Daddy and she rose to get some wood for the fire, finding them in need of more.

The snow clothes were Ianto's sizes so it was natural to transform and as she became he, there was a pulling in the gut that made him wince and rub with annoyance. He scolded himself and told himself that's what you get for not eating your evening meal before bed.

He stomped the snow off before going in, quietly placing the wood down and then finding Jack watching anyway. "You should have woken me, I would have gone love."

"It's OK Cariad" Ianto smiled softly, "I needed to get up, cramping down on the floor."

"We'll head back after lunch" Jack said as he stretched, "Give us a chance for one last walk around the lake, yeah?"

"Yes Cariad" Ianto agreed as he knelt in the bedding to kiss him and check Byrd's nappy.

She was hungry so Jack crooned softly as he fed her, revelling in her appetite as spoon after spoon op runny porridge went into the tiny mouth.

"Such a hungry bum" Jack growled at her and her little face lit up as she agreed.

Ianto was tired, even though they had slept well and he knew it was his own fault as the last year was still draining him. Things would settle again, he knew it would.

They were safe now.

After packing the car they took a leisurely wander around the lake, watching the snowflakes fall.

It was so peaceful.

Jack wondered if he had times things right, if this was all going to be right.

Ianto? You know how wonderful it's been with the wee Byrdie and I know I was hell on wheels when pregnant, but it was worth it, right?" he asked as they walked, hand in hand with the wee chick on Ianto's chest.

"Worth every moment" Ianto smiled happily.

Good" Jack sighed as he let go of the tension in his shoulder, "Good."

"Is this about a dog?" Ianto teased, "I know you want to surprise me with one."

"Um…sort of" Jack said excitedly, turning to face him and Ianto get a weird feeling as he looked at his husband.

"Jack?"

"The reason for our little get away … it isn't just for our quality time, but ….yeah. it was but …"

Ianto silenced him with a kiss, warm and loving as the world turned white around them.

"Take a breath Cariad and let it out" he whispered into Jack's ear, making them both centre again.

"I think I may have fallen" Jack said softly and Ianto pulled back with confusion.

"Fallen?"

"You know …as in …" Jack's hands fluttered and Ianto's eyes widened with shock as he finally got it.

"Jack? Are you pregnant AGAIN?"


	3. next?

The drive home was mostly silent as they listened to their daughter snore in the back, Ianto's face full of joy as he twisted in the seat to look at her, and then grimace as he felt that bite again.

Might have to get Owen to have a look.

He wondered if he had bruised something and tried to remember how he might have done it. The past non-year had been brutal and the Doctor had warned him that the little trick with Piney would cost him for a while, jumping with a passenger was not a good idea at all.

Ianto had contritely promised not to do it again, even managing to hide the crossed fingers behind his back and then felt childish about it later, wondering why he had defied him like that.

Seems he was getting a backbone and was starting to resent ultimatums.

He had gone to River and whispered it to her, only to have her laugh as she explained that all time travellers break the rules, "Just look at me sweetie!"

Now as they sped towards home Ianto relaxed and started to look forward to it, the normality, the serene calm of home.

The best way to undo the non-year's horrible effects was to relax.

"Jack, do you think your mother remembered to water the plants?" he asked dozily, blinking to stay awake and Jack looked over, feeling a rush of affection for his dopey mate.

"Yeah, you wrote the list love" he assured him and watched as Ianto finally slid into a snooze.

He check the rear-view mirror where their delighter nodded in her seat and was almost overcome with joy, having to blink and calm himself as his hormones already raged.

Another wee one, imagine.

Ianto was such a good mate, suck a loving and kind parental that Jack felt absolutely no fear. Also knowing how the last pregnancy had gone, he was hoping for a better one this time.

He knew his faults and this time he was going to try and curb his temper.

Poor Ianto had been pushed and pulled like taffy and still loved him.

Jack's hand slid to his stomach and he grinned as he stroked it, imagining the wee spark of life within, wondering if it was another wee princess or a warrior this time. Ianto's style and grace with his father's strength and superior fighting abilities.

Jack went though names in his head, scenarios where he would introduce his son proudly to newcomers, then went back to a girl.

Another wee princess to share dresses and dollies with her big sister.

Bedtime where one sat on each knee after their bath smelling so sweet and fresh with little eyes begging for a story. Matching nighties and their Taddy's cupid smiles.

He could totally see another daughter as well.

They were to the house before Jack even realised and he pulled to a stop. He turned to find Ianto blinking himself awake as he peered out and paling.

"Babe?"

"Where. The. Fuck. Is. The. Jasmine. Vine?" Ianto said each word slowly and with a deep anger that chilled Jack's blood and he peered out to see the little archway was gone as well as the vine that covered it.

Winter so the vine had been silent and sleeping but in summer it was an explosion of little white stars and a heady scent that Ianto said reminded him of his Mam.

Jack climbed out of the SUV and walked around to slowly stare down at the holes where the archway had been, then back at Ianto with confusion.

Ianto slid from the SUV and was so angry that he left the baby in there asleep, storming to the front door and bellowing as he banged on it. Jack opened his mouth to remind him that they lived there but then closed it as he watched Ianto shake with rage.

"Hearthwarmer, where the fuck is my Jasmine!" he roared and she opened the door with blinking surprise.

"Mama, the archway and vine." Jack pointed.

"Oh. It was all dead and ugly looking so they took it away for me" she smiled, "I think it really opened it up."

Ianto slumped as he heard what he already knew, pushing past her to check the house in case she had changed something else and Jack sighed as he looked at her.

"Mama, it sleeps in the winter and blooms again in spring. Ianto loved that stupid vine," Jack exclaimed.

"IT WASN'T STUPID!" came a roar from within the house and Jack winced as he realised Ianto had heard him.

"Babe!" Jack called, then remembered his baby, turning to retrieve her as she looked around with confusion.

"Sorry darling, look, we are home. Look, here's Granny" Jack shoved the tot at her grandmother and went inside to find Ianto standing in the middle of the living room hyperventilating as he stared at the remains of his lazy boy he liked to sit in after tea with his glass of whiskey.

"Oh. Benjamin got caught in there" he was told through the living shield known as his daughter, "He is only little and managed to get inside the lining and I panicked. Thought he might not be able to breathe so I had to cut him out."

Ianto turned to look at his mate with a glare of fury, then turned and stormed from the room.

"Mama?" Jack said with growing unease, "Tell me you didn't touch his closet? Not the Yan stuff? Everything is laid out precisely and anything moved …"

Jack's voice tapered off as his mother grimaced apologetically and told him that she had tried on a 'few' things.

Ianto's roar echoing down the stairs told him that she had touched 'a lot' of things.

"Oh Gods"

Ianto was never going to go away with him again.


	4. Focus on the important things

Ianto had woken in a bad mood still, not made any better when he discovered all of his suits were covered in cat hair …like …ALL OF THEM.

He was stormed off in a track suit to call into the dry cleaners first, knowing Owen could crow when he entered the hub anyway.

"Mama" Jack said softly as he watched his mother cook breakfast for him.

"Has Ianto left already dear?" she asked, "I was going to cook for him as well. He's not doing that not eating thing again I hope."

"Mama, I think the cats are driving him a bit mad" Jack sighed, "There are too many."

"Don't be silly" she snorted, "They live here!"

"WE live here" Jack amended, "Ianto is not happy with all the hair everywhere, he is about to ban them from the house and it will break wee Byrdie's heart."

"Oh dear" she sighed as she turned and saw that he was serious. "I suppose I could ask the lilacs if they want a few more, and those across from them with the two headed dog thing …I know a few of the gingers visit them a lot. I could offer them, if I have to."

"Mama, please don't try the big eye tactic" Jack sighed, "Ianto's narrowed ones trump them every time."

"Bother" Dahlia sat and nodded, knowing Jack was right, they had seemed to multiply over night.

Jack dressed and went into work, hoping to find Ianto in a happier mood but unfortunately his demeanour hadn't improved as the only suit available was the dark purple one. A Friday suit, not a Monday suit.

"Yes. Ianto has different colours for different days." Jack hissed at Rhys, "No. He doesn't have a pink one. For Christsake give me a hand here, he's on the verge of one of his sulks."

"I do not sulk" Ianto snarled and Jack grimaced as Rhys looked over his shoulder and smiled at his fellow Welshman.

"Aye, aye, mate" he said happily, "Jack said the cabin was lovely."

"Yes." Ianto said stiltedly, "Nice."

"Shit. Single syllable answers" Andy whispered. "You are already fucked in my opinion."

"Shit" Jack huffed, following Ianto and rubbing his belly as he thought of a way to appease Ianto and divert his temper.

"Babe?"

"Busy" Ianto grunted as he bent under the counter to do a spot of plumbing.

"Sorry" Jack wheedled, "I talked to Mama and she said she is going to get rid of some of the fluffs. I explained that it wasn't hygienic."

Ianto looked up at him with a frown, "You didn't say it was me did you? She can sulk something fierce."

"No baby" Jack said with wide eyes, "I totally said I wasn't happy with the arrangements as of late."

Ianto's eyes narrowed as he regarded him and then he looked away to Jack's relief.

"So, what time do you want to go home?" Jack asked, shuffling his feet, "I can arrange my schedule so we can go home together babe."

"I have a lot to do, we just had time off remember?" Ianto rose and looked at him, "Besides. Once your mother smells that new baby she will be insufferable."

"What new baby?" Owen asked.

"Me!" Jack said gleefully, "I'm feeling bloaty, I think I might have fallen again."

"Ya fucking joking" Owen sighed, "Christ. You two breed like bloody rabbits, meanwhile …ah. Shit, don't say anything to Tosh yet. Let me break it to her."

"What do you mean?" Ianto was interested now, watching him as he headed for the fridge.

"We did some tests and …looks like she can't do it" Owen said softly, "Two miscarriages already. She didn't want to bother you, they were just bleeds, early on. Looks like she can't hold them in. I'm thinking from her time with Unit."

"Oh no" Ianto sighed, "I never even noticed, once she would have told me."

"She knew you would react like this, she didn't want to take away any happiness right now, the wee bit is so lovely and I know how happy you are" Owen patted Ianto's arm, "Give her time to adjust to it. We can always adopt or something. It doesn't mean no kids, just …adjustments."

Owen bustled off with a look of woe.

Jack pulled Ianto into his arms, trying to soothe him.

"Oh, poor Tosh" Ianto sighed as he felt Jack's stomach pressing against him and he felt a flutter of love, placing his hands over the spot where the new life resided.

Not fair.


	5. insert foot again?

The lilacs came over with raspberry jelly to say thank you for the new babies, gushing several shades of happiness as Ianto smiled softly.

He had spent the night at the hub, both annoyed with his home full of cat hair and the amount of work piled up, having just arrived home still in the purple suit.

Apparently the lilacs were enamoured.

Ianto watched one touch her stomach happily and he asked if she was Ok, the other adult replying that she was birthing. This time tomorrow there would be a new lilac to welcome the fluffs.

Jack was ecstatic, telling them about his own wee spark and they all gushed as Ianto stood back.

They asked what was wrong and he shrugged, explaining about Tosh and Owen as they entered the kitchen where Dahlia and Byrd were. They seemed as crestfallen as him, agreeing that breeding was a wonderful thing.

"Yeah, well Andy and Rhys will have to find one too" Dahlia pointed out gaily, "They can't breed either."

The lilacs listened with interest as she explained that men of this time can't procreate together like in Jack's time and there was silence as they digested that …along with the jelly. They then looked at Ianto and he confirmed that men could not seed, Jack had been experimented with during his time at Torchwood to make sure and sadly there would be no offspring here with 21st century men either.

Once they left Ianto rose to go through their baby things, placing some aside for the lilacs.

"But what about this one?" Jack whined and Ianto rolled his eyes.

"Cariad, you know 'this one' will be spoilt rotten and want for nothing" Ianto scolded, "Don't be silly. How will they go baby shopping?"

"Oh, I hadn't thought of that."

"Some of this stuff as never even worn by mistress fatty" Ianto snorted and Jack growled.

"Don't call her that!" he demanded, "She is not fat, why do you keep putting her down. Gods, if not for the moments of tenderness I would think you didn't even like her!"

Ianto stopped sorting and looked at him, aghast.

Jack didn't see the expression of hurt and kept flapping, "you will give her a complex, turn her into one of those anorexics. I hope you don't start with the new one as well. You are so picky. I wonder if you ever hear your father's spite coming out of your mouth!"

Jack had taken a step over the line into Stupidville and he realized as he turned to apologise, finding an empty room.

Shit he was touchy lately.

Oh. Right.

TYTNW.

Shit.

Ianto was already on stirs and reaching for the keys, his anger a slow burn as Dahlia looked up form where she was playing on the floor with the little girl and her smile faded as she realised Ianto was gong back to work, "Sweetling, you just got home. You don't even have a change of clothes with you"

"Its fine" Ianto said as he pulled his Burberry down as well, "Give her a kiss from me at bedtime."

Byrd looked up and squealed for her father, her little face full of hope and Ianto relented, kneeling to kiss her goodbye.

"Ianto, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to compare you to your father" Jack huffed as he entered, It just came out wrong. Babe …"

Ianto rose and headed out the door, closing it softly, the little girl's huff of annoyance as she threw her toy after him evidence that she had wanted more than just a kiss.

"What did you do!" his mother scolded with a frown, her lovely hot pot simmering in the oven going to waste again. She was hoping to feed him tonight.

"My hormones made my mouth move" Jack snarled, moving towards the baby who narrowed her eyes as she pouted and folded her wee arms in a symbolic show of defiance.

"Really?" Jack asked with surprise.

Byrd deliberately turned her face away and reached for another toy, examining it like it was the best thing ever.

Jack stood back with surprise as he was given a cold shoulder with such distain that even his mother noticed.

"Oh sweetling" she crooned, "Kisses for Daddy?"

The little head swivelled in such a 'Ianto' way that Jack got chills watching the slow blink of disapproval and then she went back to bashing a dolly against the floor.

"Leave her Mama" Jack sighed, "She is just annoyed because she wanted her Taddy. Going to be another lot of cold crow pie I will have to eat, I guess."

"What?" his mother gasped with horror, "You eat crows in that hub?"

"It's an expression" Jack slumped, "At least he will forgive me once I rub my belly and remind him that I can't be upset in my condit ….shit"

Dahlia was squealing as she jumped up and down declaring that she thought he looked more 'glowy' and Jack had to admit that it was nice to get fussed on.

Then Jack decided to go after Ianto and clear the air.

After all, he was the hormonal one here, not Ianto.

Right?


	6. listen to him, he's a Doctor

Nothing had been solved that night, Ianto too tired to argue and had given in as Jack had crawled into the bed with him, whispering apologies.

The next day they woke to find a Tardis waiting and an agitated doctor, ready to tell them that there was a hic-cup in time.

"Huh?" Jack frowned.

"Someone else is using the time streams and had cocked up" the Doctor sighed with a frown that make his hawk-like features even more startling to Jack, "I wouldn't ask normally but I know that you and Ianto here are the most likely to slip in and out undetected. Just a quick wee jaunt, nothing serious or dangerous. I wouldn't dare with a wee one coming soon."

Jack smiled as his hands went to his stomach, pleased that the Doctor had acknowledged the bub, this was everything to Jack as it meant the baby was real. The doctor would not have mentioned it unless it had a place in the time steams as well, right?

"Doctor, can you tell me if it's another girl or a boy this time?" he whispered as they walked along the gantry towards the stairs and the doctor snorted as he shook his head.

"Not fair" he hissed as he tapped his nose with a finger, "Ianto likes the surprise of it, even if you don't ya big baby!"

Jack stopped walking and gaped as the Doctor skipped over to join Ianto as he descended the stairs and then with a bark of laughter Jack followed. Cheeky Timelord, this face.

"So, this piece of tat is important, is it?" Owen asked as he stood behind Tosh who was seated at her workstation, his hands gently massaging her without him even realising, such was their intimacy now.

"Well, it's in the wrong time period and in the wrong hands. They are tearing the fabric with their haphazard useage" the Doctor agreed as Rhys approached with a tea set to rival the Queen's and the Doctor's face lit up, "We need to do a snatch and run thingy."

"Jammy dodger?" Andy offered politely, holding out the china plate and the Doctor smiled back just as politely as he took the entire plate and placed it on his knee. Andy blinked, then went back for another plate as Ianto stifled a smile.

"So, just a quickie" Jack said with glee, "I can do that!"

"Yes, well. Er, Theraxian contacts are notoriously nervous" the Doctor grimaced as Jack's face grimaced at the mention of the humanoid death mongers. If they had something the Doctor wanted out of their filthy grasp t must be something bad, or he would steer clear of them like everyone else. Probably in the slave trade again the bastards.

"Well, if it must be done" Ianto sighed as he took a seat, "When and how long?"

"Soon? We can accomplish it within a week, no need to worry about …er …showing" the Doctor said with a flustered flap of his hand as he shoved a biscuit into his mouth and Ianto's eyes narrowed as he realised there was something the Doctor didn't want to say, the obvious shoving of said biscuit acting like a self imposed gag.

"OK, whatever" he said softly, looking over at Owen who was leaning over Tosh as they read the file on the Theraxian Race and his face changed to one of open horror as he glanced back at Ianto then Jack who was oblivious to the activity behind him.

"We will need a staff meeting Sir" Ianto said calmly, "Before departing, to assure the team that it will only be a momentary absence. Don't' forget its Tosh's birthday on Friday. I intend to bake that cake."

"What? Yes, yes baby, of course" Jack nodded absently, still thinking about the nursery and the upgrade it would need for this new life.

The Doctor rose and hesitated, looking back at Ianto and motioning, "I would like to show you something I have found in a box, Sweetie."

Ianto rose and followed his friend into the Tardis where he was shown a small box and when he opened it there was a wrist strap. It was not unlike a VM except for markings carved on the leather and the Doctor cleared his throat as he tapped it with his finger.

"This is a short jumper" he explained, "You, maybe Jack. Look, it's limited and feeds off those around it, as in the life energy. You and Jack would keep it fully charged for an eternity but right now, with the little one in the way there has to be limits. It can only be used once, only if the plan goes awry. Just for you. You understand?"

Ianto nodded as he strapped it on, remembering the warnings that he needed to heal from TYTNW before jumping about the cosmos willy-nilly. Yeah, the Doctor had actually said willy-nilly with a shake of his head.

As much as he hoped this little errand for the Doctor would be a piece of cake, he also knew there was a strong possibility that it could all go pear shaped in a moment's blink of the eye.

The Doctor's worried expression also warning that he also knew this was not as simple as he had lain out, but for some reason the Doctor was adamant that it had to be done. Now. Ianto just hoped he could keep Jack safe, their little one safe and that they would get this done. Then he really hoped they might have a little holiday, maybe if he talked to the Doctor nicely they could stop on a beach planet for a while?

Be back before Jack was really showing, let the team think it was only a few minutes, not a whole fucking month of rest?

Gods, Ianto felt like he needed it.

He felt so drained.

With a sigh he straightened his back and walked back into the hub where Jack was going over ideas with the Doctor for the retrieval mission.

Things were all go.

Ianto swallowed back the nausea as he tried to settle his nerves.

He had a bad feeling about this and the Doctor's furtive glances were not helping one jot.


	7. a Blast in the Past

Jack leaned back in the seat and smiled politely at the man opposite as the bustle of the café continued around them.

The horse drawn carriages moving in the street added to the soft ambient noise and the rustle of skirts as the woman and child approached was almost soothing, Jack maintaining eye contact with the man he was bartering with so that the child covertly moving between the tables seemed to disappear into the common world.

Theraxian, the creature was no man, nor was Hir companion seated at another table and almost undetectable as anything other than another 18th century member of gentry at high tea. However, the fact that the child had taken a moment to hesitate near the table and reach down to pick up a small dog gave Jack all the warning he needed and as the child slid back into the street and oblivion Jack became still, letting the noise filter out as their waiter approached with a grim look over his shoulder.

Jack knew without looking it who it was directed at and he swallowed compulsively before grinning at his mark and commenting on the smell from the street.

It was all going well and Jack had everything under control, well …until the one at the other table stood and signalled that they wanted to leave. Something had spooked Hir and Jack swore softly, rising politely as his mark snarled softly in reply and went to scoop up the artefact sitting on the table between them.

The explosion was loud and Jack was thrown forward over the table, scooping up the artefact as he rolled and by the time the Theraxians realised they had been tricked Jack was already on his feet running, and the hand sliding into the crook of his elbow and guiding him towards the back of the dinner and to the alley way behind a familiar warmth, the child slightly ahead of them calling back and his running mate lifted his hand and flicked his wrist, muttering before the end of the alley started to glow, fill with swirls of gold dust, then symbols as the incantation being muttered beside him took strength and the circle of swirls became the jump hole they needed, the child leaping without a second glance back and Jack finding himself thrown in and rolling to cushion the fall to …whenever.

He rolled to his feet and stood, straightening his clothes as the child also stood, flicking off the cloak to reveal itself as a small creature similar to a Gerfolittax except for it having pale skin, not bright yellow like one, so it was obviously a hybrid with humanlike features and the appearance of a six year old child when actually fully grown and as strong as a full grown human male. The glance over its shoulder was one of question and again Jack knew it was not directed at him and he sighed as he turned to address his partner knowing the apology for missing the third Theraxian would probably be brushed aside.

As it was, the dark three piece suit was no longer being brushed down as he was moving away with great strides and Jack sighed, then began to follow and soft calls of apology that fell on deaf ears.

He came to the edge of the gantry and leaned over the railings to look over the flurry of activity as the little one flicked the recording instruments at the nearest person and stomped off demanding a strong drink and as the images taken at the scene flickered onto a wide screen Jack's companion finally stepped up beside him and leaned over the railing as well.

"I've never had a problem with them before, honest love. I would have never put our wee spark in danger, I swear!" Jack now know any words would falter so he glances furtively at him, trying to gauge the level of anger, watching the lean delicate hand rubbing at the stubble on his face and the rasping noise went straight to Jack's groin, making him clear his throat and stand up straight.

"I don't know whether to beat the living tar out of you or give thanks that there were no casualties with that Theraxian's panic attack" came a soft growl, "Canaries? They are afraid of fucking birds?"

Jack groaned as it all became clear, the peddler going table to table with the small cage of birds had been overlooked and he nodded with a look of apology. "Sorry babe, I didn't know that one. Honest."

Ianto grimaced as his hand went to his lower back, the only indication that it had cost him to jump all three life forms instead of just the two of them. The Doctor had been clear "Just you" he had said. Ianto hid the pain that was shooting up from his tail bone to his shoulder blades by leaning forward again to relieve the pressure.

"I knew they freaked at mice, I didn't know about small birds too" Jack grimaced, "Sorry?"

"Owen!" he leaned over the railing and Jack glanced back in time to see the black clothing shift to accommodate that pert arse, well, he deserved something for his troubles didn't he? "Owen, did we get what we need?"

"Yes Ianto" came a distant reply from Tosh, "We passed it off as a gas leak. We have some minor injuries reported, nothing serious and the place will be back up and running in a matter of days. The archives say it becomes a tourist spot for those wanting to see where it happened. The time streams are intact."

"Good" he muttered, straightening up, "Stop looking at my arse!"

"Can't help it" Jack sighed, "It's like …right there. Mocking me!"

With an award worthy eye roll he turned and faced Jack, "That was too close. You know that. As long as there is the darkness we must move within the light. I have a report to write now and you know I hate having to do the whole 'oops' thing. I can hear the Tardis approaching from three parsecs away!"

"Yeah, sorry?" Jack offered and the snort told him he was forgiven as his gorgeous but tired husband turned away. It was probably the last jump they could afford with the portable transmitter device attached to Ianto's arm like a modified VM and Jack also knew the Doctor was about to arrive and tear it apart with fury. This new face was all kinds of scary even if Ianto seemed able to control him.

"I need a shave, I hate my hair this long and these boot are bastards to run in, I need better footwear" he muttered as he walked away from Jack, who leaned back against the railing to watch the arse mincing away before realising that a shave meant a shower.

"Ianto!" he yelled, following at speed, "Me too baby? Me too?"

Ianto hesitated as he waited and huffed softly, allowing his partner to catch up before gently taking his hand and stepping though to their penthouse-style quarters.

Above them the city hummed with 21st century life.

Cardiff.

Home.


	8. Confusion continues

"I know things went a bit tits up but we got it, didn't we?" Jack demanded as he watched the Doctor pace back and forth angrily.

"Yes! But at what cost?" the Doctor roared, sounding uncannily like Ianto had in the shower not ten minutes ago.

"Look, the timelines are intact, the shits can't cause any more problems and we know they retreated through their wormhole before it closed as well." Ianto sat heavily, grunting with pain, "Let's just put a line under this as another fucked up Torchwood file to be stamped as closed and move on, yeah? I'm tired."

The Doctor looked at Jack triumphantly and Jack felt like Ianto had somehow given the Doctor credence to his claims that they had fucked it up.

"If you weren't happy you could have done it yourself" Jack hissed, "Stop carrying on like we pissed in your pot of tea."

The Doctor grimaced as he placed his cup down, looking over at Ianto again as Ianto shifted in the chair. "How are you?"

"Tired" came a terse reply.

"I'm sorry, you wanted that wee break and …well. I have clean up to do now, can come back though?" he offered and Ianto shook his head then grimaced as the pain shot up his back again. "You need to go lay down or something. You've pulled something haven't you."

Jack lifted his mug and was in time to see a spark of anger before Ianto let rip.

"This was a cock up from go to woe!" he growled, "You knew it was a team, not just a matched pair, you knew damned well that I would have to get Jack and our unborn child out of there because you gave me the means to do it and you knew fucking well that you would not have got within a bloody mile of them the way they smell the vortex. Of course they smelt the foetus. Christ almighty, I bet they reacted to that long before one startled at the Canary!"

The doctor opened his mouth but Ianto wasn't done.

"Jack didn't need to be there!" he was now on his feet as he gained a second wind, "Our child, did not need to be there! That was too close!"

The doctor opened his mouth and then snapped it shut, looking at Jack for a few moments before trying again, "I want that strap back."

Ianto already had it in his pocket and he flicked it onto the table before walking away, "Take it. It hurt like a bitch anyway."

"Well I did say it was just for you" the Doctor said as he shoved it in his pocket and Ianto hesitated as he turned to look at the Doctor with confusion.

He followed the Doctor into the Tardis, "What do you mean. Just for me. I thought this was for me and Jack as I was not able to jump another so soon after Piney. What are you saying. That I sacrifice my husband? My baby?"

"What I mean is that you almost sacrificed your baby for your husband" the Doctor muttered then sighed as he rubbed his hands through his hair in a sign of frustration, "Bloody timelines, Sweetie you know you are pushing me. Bugger off!"

Finally Ianto relented, snorting as he stepped back and started to leave, hesitating near the door to reach out and stroke the coral softly as he crooned to the Tardis that she was looked pretty today.

She was pleased that he had remembered to address her, as always he had impeccable manners but she also worried as his touch told her that he was so tired and so very near collapse. She told the Doctor immediately and he sighed as he looked up at her and nodded to show he already knew he had made things worse with his little problem.

"I had no choice Sexy" he said softly to the box around him, "This is fixed. It has to happen and I would rather not be around to watch. You and I both know this is going to be difficult on both of them. By the Great Rassilon, I just hope he forgives me."

As the Tardis ground away Ianto watched from the doorway of Jack's office with a feeling of trepidation. Something was not right there, the Doctor was holding something back and it didn't sit well in Ianto's churning gut.

"I'm hungry!" Jack declared down below, slapping his hands on the table as he looked imploringly up at Ianto, then rubbed his invisible bump with a pout. Ianto smiled and opened the phone to call some takeaways to soothe the savage beast.

Even if his own appetite was still lacking, Jack needed to eat.

Ianto could at least do that before he went to lay down.

Gods, he was so tired.


	9. thanks for nothing

"Ianto!" Jack was frantic in the bedding, pulling at Ianto who grunted as the motion twanged his back and he turned his head to look at Jack.

"What's wrong Cariad?" Ianto whispered, "You can't be hungry again?"

"Need to pee" Jack whimpered with wide eyes and Ianto held back a huff, rising to turn on the lights and fetch his slippers, also annoyed that there was a huge baby sized hole in the bed where his daughter ought to be but since Jack was pregnant again he complanied that she kicked too much.

"Besides, she will have to get used to her own bed before the baby gets here!" Dahlia had said imperiously _. Yeah, it had started_. "That's how we do it on Boeshane."

She was quite happy in her little nursery, Ianto half-pie wondered if he would be as well as Dahlia suddenly entered the room and rushed to her son with a look of concern.

"I needed to Pee mama" Jack grumbled, "Busting here!"

"Oh poor darling" she crooned, helping him stand like he was a fucking invalid in his final months instead of barely even showing and Ianto went to step aside, finding himself slammed against the doorframe as they both tried to fit through. If he wasn't so tired it might have appeared funny, like a Benny Hill act.

Gods, his back was fucking killing him and this was all too much.

"Jack? Want me to heat a wheat pack for when you go back?" Ianto tried and Jack swung to glare at him like he had offered to smear shit on the sheets or something.

"If you want to help me now, then I could use that snack you offered!" Jack huffed and Ianto blinked as he didn't actually offer one, if memory serves correctly, but he nodded and smiled softly as he asked if it was pickles or tomatoes tonight.

"Tomatoes! Are you trying to kill him?" Dahlia gasped, even as Jack gave that as his choice.

Ianto walked down to get the snack and came back up the stairs in time to hear his husband complaining.

"I thought it would be different this time. He would be…I don't know. Happier, more attentive now he knows how hard this is for me! All he does is complain about his bloody back, like I don't matter"

Although he couldn't see it, Ianto know the pout was accompanied by a tear or two as Dahlia crooned and softly agreed that he was the most precious thing in the worlds. Ianto backed up the stairs and noisily approached.

"For the love of the Gods, you will wake the baby!" Jack snarled, "Just give it to me and go check on her. I have Mama here with me, she can at least rub my back without making out hers is worse!"

Ianto felt the sting and retreated, surprised by the tears forming as he rushed to the nursery where Byrd was snoring softly, her arms thrown back in complete peace.

The bed winked at him and he decided to lie down for a minute, just while Dahlia was fussing.

He woke to giggling and blearily sat up, groaning softly as his back bit hard, Byrd waving from her crib with her messy hair.

"Hey stinky" he smiled affectionately, "Come to Tadda and we …."

"You woke her!" Dahlia huffed entering and scoping her up, "He was asking for her."

Ianto slumped as he muttered to the ceiling in a sarcastic tone, "Oh no, this one won't be like the last. Honest."

He rose and stomped off to the hub, intending to find Owen and ask him to have another look at his back, it should have been healing by now. Were those bloody nanites not working?

He limped into the hub and sighed at the state of it, immediately starting to clean while he waited for Owen and when he came in he told Ianto that he had to go to Jack as he had already been on the blower and if his back was really annoying him he should take a bloody paracetamol and suck t up.

"Suck it up" Ianto muttered to himself as he shoved the trolley down the row of cells "If I suck it up anymore I'll fucking implode!"

Janet came to the glass and hummed at him in question.

"Don't mind me love, I'm in a dreadful mood apparently" Ianto huffed, sliding her food slot open and as he leaned over so did she, still humming, then reaching out to place her hand against the glass at waist height.

"Me back, yeah. Hurts" Ianto smiled at her, "Funny even you can see that when they can't. Maybe you should wear the white coat, your bedside manner is probably better than his too."

Janet held a piece of meat and watched him limp away with a canted head, still humming softly.

Owen came back and declared everyone 'whinging tossers who needed a fucking life' before depositing himself in a chair with a game controller. "By the way I did those bloods from the last trip you two took to check for any bugs, Jack's up the duff again! Thought there was something wrong with the baby but he farted when I got there so I didn't even have to examine him. Whingers the lot of you."

Ianto gave him a coffee and thanked him for seeing to Jack even if it was a false alarm.

Owen snorted and killed some more zombies on his screen.

Ianto moved away to tidy some more.

"Hey, the purples or lilacs or whatever they are called want to see us" Owen called out, "You know why?"

"No, might be an anatomy question" Ianto replied, "They were most interested when Tosh explained about breeding to them."

"Shit" Owen huffed, "The birds and the bees."

"And a little old thing called love" Ianto finished with another sigh.

It seemed in short supply lately.


	10. hormonal jags

"Tosh?" Ianto said softly, "You got a minute?"

Tosh looked up from her book and sighed softly as she saw his look of concentration, like he was about to tell her bad news. She motioned for him to sit and bit back another sigh as she prepared for the next half hour of complaining about Jack and his baby.

She wouldn't matter so much except …her period was here. Late. After the miscarriage two months ago she had hoped for a little time to get used to the idea of no baby and then she hadn't gotten her period and she had hoped …silly really … but it kept getting rubbed in her face that despite her third failed attempt these two could churn them out like bloody reports.

"Does the coffee taste funny to you?" Ianto asked and she stalled, surprised at last.

"No, the same as always." She frowned.

"Jack sad it smelt funny, and tasted sour. I was a bit worried that it might be a dud batch, you get that sometimes" Ianto said with a genuine apology in his voice as he looked at the bags under her eyes.

"Well, can't you tell?" she frowned.

"No, I've stopped having it as Jack felt it unfair that I could drink it when he was only allowed his one cup a day" Ianto smiled wanly, "And now apparently he is a couple of heartbeats away from accusing me of pissing in the pot."

And there it was, the griping was about to begin. Tosh slammed the book shut and turned to face him squarely, "Look Ianto. Try another blend or just give him decaf, he won't know the difference as no matter what you do he will find something to whine about. This is Jack, it's what he does. If your back is still aching stop slumping like that, you look like an extra off one of Owen's games and for Godsake, stop going on about the baby!"

"Tosh?" Ianto blinked with confusion, hurt at her outburst as she stormed off to the toilet to change her tampon.

He stared at the cup of coffee and then sighed, raising it to sniff with distaste then he placed it back down and wandered down to the archives where he couldn't annoy anyone else.

Was he complaining too much?

He had thought him and Tosh were like sisters …well …you know what I mean but she was so short tempered …..ah. Shit. Ianto walked back up to find her sitting back at her desk with her eyes red from crying.

"Tosh?" he whispered softly, "Did you …again?"

She nodded silently and he sighed as he pulled her against him and let her cry softly into his chest. The pain seemed to pull at him and he may have wiped away a tear or two himself.

"For the love of god, you two bawling up here?" Owen huffed, "It's a miscarriage. We've had them before, probably will again. We only have a one on four chance of falling with the scaring from her 'Unit' past anyway"

Tosh winced as Owen spoke of her rape while in Unit custody like it was something she had deliberately done to sabotage their chances now and Ianto felt a rage fall over him as he glared at Owen, surprising all of them as he snarled at him to shut the fuck up.

Christ" Owen muttered as he moved away, "We are all too fucking hormonal at the moment. Shit Time Boy, anyone would think you were the pregnant one. Jack's hormones are infecting us like the fucking plague."

Ianto snorted as he kissed Tosh's forehead and then went to get her some nice green tea in her little tea set she liked for special occasions. As if he could be the one pregnant. He couldn't be trusted to even change his own daughter's nappy.

He spent the rest of the day walking on eggshells , feeling just as shitty as he did at home and wondering why he even bothered as Tosh snapped about the lunch order and Owen deliberately messed up the kitchen.

"Come on you two doctors" he called out as Rhys and Andy arrived for shift change, "Let's go see what the Lilacs want with you, hopefully they want to convert you into crazy cat people so I can get rid of some of the little shits."

"Oh well, with such wonderful salesman skills like that, I bet you taught them just how to make us want our own furry little shit maker!" Owen laughed, finally lightening the mood.

"Sorry I'm in a snot" Ianto said as they drove towards home, "I don't mean to bring it to work. I know I'm a wet week at the moment."

"Don't worry, it's just this rain" Owen decided to forgive him, "Can't rain all the time."

"The Crow - Brandon Lee" Ianto supplied the source of the quote and they laughed, Owen glad his favourite movie quote had been recognised and acknowledged.

That's the thing with Ianto, he knows a good quote when he hears one.

Tosh watched Owen smile and felt better as well, their own pain able to be pushed aside. The Lilacs needed something and they were going to do what they could to help. Such lovely, affectionate things the way they had hugged her and Owen last time as they had left.

Almost like they didn't want them to go. Their tentacles stroking their faces so tenderly.

_Maybe they were imagining them as cats?_

Tosh finally smiled as she found a happy place.

If only Ianto could as well.


	11. origins

Tosh was in shock, only able to stare mutely at the aliens as they undulated around them.

"You've fucking joking, they're joking right?" Owen had the opposite reaction.

"Nope" Jack grinned, "It appears that they are serious. They have finished growing their offspring and feel that two are all they need right now so they want to grow one for you. We gave them the furies and they seem quite fixated on the idea of giving babies in exchange. Owen being there at the crash site, showing such compassion over their loss has really made them feel that they need to offer."

"Yeah, but. Really? Can they?" Owen frowned, "I mean …really?"

"They have tested you both, tasted you if ya like, they are saying that you are compatible" Jack shrugged, "They only want to know if you want a boy or girl."

"Boy" Tosh said as Owen said "Girl."

"Er…whatever" Owen shrugged, "As long as it is …human."

The Lilacs seemed to have a conversation and then bowed and left, Tosh frowning as she looked at Owen, "What did we decide? A boy or a girl?"

Ianto suddenly leapt to his feet, clearing his throat as he said he needed the loo, then he stood in the bathroom splashing water on his face as he tried to work out how to tell them they were getting one of each.

Now at least he knew where Harper and Hero had gotten their ability to have silent conversations.

How ironic.

This timeline thing was so strange, his knowledge of what was to come, what had been and what may be changed was doing his head in, he felt light headed and sighed as he knew Jack would be waiting for him to return.

He walked back towards their living room and slowed as he heard talking, wanting another moment to stop the slouch he had lately that was annoying Jack no end.

"Ianto can do it!" Jack said and Ianto straightened, then stepped into the room with a look of question.

"They will need a nursery, they have nothing sorted, and I was just saying you can do that for them. Take you no time" Jack said happily, not even looking up as Ianto balked.

Great. How do you pretend you don't know there are twins coming when you are expected to do the bloody nursery. Ianto sighed and rubbed the back of his neck as he tried to work out how the manage that.

"Peppermint and cream?" Ianto offered after a while, "Nothing too gender orientated?"

"Yes!" Tosh was first to approve, "I don't' want to raise our child occurring to gender. I would prefer a name that is not gender exclusive either. Thank you Ianto, I hated the thought of yellow. Peppermint, please."

Jack frowned, "We could just ask the Lilacs which they chose you know."

"Wibbly-wobbly dear" Ianto said with as much politeness as he could manage, hoping jJack would get it but of course he kept going regardless.

"Our snot has so much, we can sort things if we know the sex. I am having a boy this time, I feel it in my waters! Babe? Some of Byrdie's clothes never fitted her." Jack said happily and Ianto bit back the retort that they shouldn't count their chickens, then sighed.

There had been no little brother with Byrd, he knew she never mentioned one. The feeling of doom seemed to descend and despite his polite agreement Jack saw the flicker of annoyance and frowned. Ianto finally sat, deciding everyone was now fed and watered, groaning softly as his back bit and Jack huffed.

"Your back again?" Jack asked pleasantly but Ianto heard the warning and smiled back just as politely.

"Just a little bruising from the last mission Cariad" he said soothingly, "Nothing compared to your poor feet. I already have everything upstairs to give you a lovely wee foot rub to help you sleep."

Jack seemed mollified with that offer and smiled again, turning back to Tosh.

"You will miss all this, nothing like feeling a wee life growing inside you. Getting fussed on because you are special" Jack gushed, then felt Ianto stiffen beside him.

"Those of us unable to feel the same level of giving can still provide love" Ianto assured Tosh, "I see Jack in her, as much as me. Little things can bring such joy. Your little girl …or boy …will be loved. All that matters. I know it seems like you failed but you didn't. You simply used an enhancement, like … a microwave instead of a conventional oven. These children will be loved."

"Yes" Jack crooned as he rubbed his little bump, "Our children will be best friends, like little twins almost, although yours will come before mine. Lilacs cook them so quickly."

Ianto had realised his slip and was relieved when Jack had saved him without even knowing it and he leaned over, kissing him lovingly as he placed a hand on Jack's knee, "Cariad. You are such a clever sausage you know."

Jack was surprised and smiled with delight as he looked into Ianto's face for any sign of sorrow. He was pleased to see Ianto happy and wished there was something he could do to help. He knew he was somehow annoying him and couldn't quite work out how.

Whatever was bugging him, Jack hoped he let it go soon.

Can't be good for the baby.


	12. running away

Ianto found Jack in the office, perched in his chair with his feet up on the desk and the sight of him rubbing his little bump seemed to enrage Ianto in a way he couldn't explain so he placed the cup of hot chocolate down and turned to leave Jack to his paperwork before he said something rude.

"Ianto? When is Yan coming out to play?" Jack asked as he rubbed and looked up at the ceiling, "Ianto is such a dull boy lately."

"Excuse me?" Ianto turned on his heel to gape at Jack. "You know the Doctor said I can't transform until I have recovered from TYTNW."

"Ever since the cabin, you've been all mopey and grumbly" Jack huffed, "Even Mama has noticed you calling her Hearthwarmer again instead of Mama, asked me if she has done something wrong. How do I tell her it wasn't her that did but you?"

Ianto was gobsmacked.

"The Year that Never Was was not my fucking fault" Ianto said calmly, "Why would you think I was somehow behind that madman's carry on? Did I not do all I could for you?"

"I didn't mean it like that" Jack sighed, "Gods. Ianto, I love you but sometimes you are very hard to like you know. You chose to jump with Piney, something he told you to never do!"

Ianto nodded and left. Well, retreated is a better word I guess.

Ianto went back over what had happened during that year and then remembered that it had not been the same for Jack. What was only a moment ago for him had been some time for Jack. Jack had known him before Yan had even really existed.

_Gods, this timeline shit can mess with your head._

Where was the man who held him in the firelight, kissing and stroking away his fears?

As if Jack had heard him, the coms crackled, "Ianto? Sorry."

Ianto felt a smile tugging as he started to forgive him, then Jack spoke again, "I spilt the hot chocolate. Can you get me another please? Also, copies of the reports you brought me this morning. They are all toast!"

Ianto felt his blood boil and he growled softly, not realising the coms were still on.

"I heard that, if you had slept with me last night you might be in a better mood today." Jack scolded, "You know morning sex always helps!"

"Your mother might have objected sir!" Ianto said sweetly as he started to heat the milk.

"Is this about Byrd?"

"Pardon?" Ianto froze, the spoon full of chocolate powder half way to the pan, "What is that supposed to mean?"

"You mollycoddle her, you know you do!" Jack huffed, "She is going to be too big for that once the baby comes, besides. My son will need your attention more, you are the one who will have to care for him while I recover."

"Like with Byrd? Did you tell your mother this?" Ianto slammed the pan down, slopping the drink, then calmly raised it and poured it into one of the big mugs.

"We would have been lost without her, you know she was invaluable" Jack was growling and as Ianto entered the office Jack rose from behind the desk and snatched the mug, slopping the hot chocolate on the floor, "Don't you start on Mama. Another baby is going to be so much more work for her, you don't hear her complaining."

Ianto blinked.

"No sir, of course" Ianto finally said, his face serene, "I will just go…er…lunch."

"I'm not hungry, you've taken my appetite!" Jack huffed as he slouched into his chair and took a swig of the hot chocolate, making sure there were marshmallows.

Ianto walked stiltedly down to the main hub where Tosh was sitting with a look of horror, the coms had been on and they had heard everything.

"Mate, we'll sort something for lunch, you go get yourself something and have a wee sit down" Owen said softly, "We'll muddle through. You look beat."

"Yeah" Ianto sighed.

"Your back is still hurting, isn't it" Rhys observed, "Maybe you should go get a massage or something."

A snort had them all looking up as Jack stood at the railing, "HE needs a massage? Gods!"

As Jack turned and stomped back into his office as Ianto paled at the insinuation that he was being a bad mate.

Maybe he was.

His back bit again and so did tears as he stumbled, leaning against the wall of the hallway as he finally let his hands travel to the small of his back and he moaned as he tried to ease the ache.

Nobody needed him here, he seemed to do nothing right.

With a sniff of sorrow Ianto let his head hit the wall, trying to work out why things were not working.

He was hungry too.

Finally he climbed into the Austin Martin and pulled out into the traffic, heading for his favourite café.

By the time he came out of his fugue he was sitting in a lay-by on the side of the road and he looked around with confusion as he tried to work out here he was.

"Baby brain" he muttered as he pulled out again and headed for where he was obviously intending to go, since he was over half way there.

Although….

He didn't quite know when he had decided to go to the cabin.

Maybe if he goes back to where things started to go wrong he can work out how to fix it.

Right?

Clearly, he had done something wrong.

.

.

.

.

.This is my early posting for my birthday ...calm down, you will get another in about 12 hours


	13. Bugger

Jack sighed and rose to find Ianto, his guts-ache was growing.

"Owen? Where's Ianto?"

"Went out" came a terse reply, "What do you need?"

"My stomach is grumpy now" Jack pouted, then his eyes slid to the med-bay, "Owen. Any chance of a wee sneak peek at the bub?"

"Without Ianto here?" Tosh said softly, "The first scan?"

"Just a sneaky one" Jack said softly with a pout that was one of his best, knowing Owen would relent, which he did.

"Come on, just a quickie" Owen huffed, "God, never thought I would say those words to you!"

Jack laughed as he slid onto the table and rubbed, "Such a dull ache, like …I need to take a dump but I tried that already. You think he's just sitting low?"

Owen grunted and placed the wand on Jack's stomach, then frowned.

"Well? Where's the heartbeat?" Jack demanded eagerly.

"Ah…shut up a minute" Owen said softly, as he leaned into the screen and looked with open confusion.

"Owen?"

Owen frowned as Tosh stepped around and her hand moved to her mouth as she looked as well.

"Guys?" Andy asked softly, looking from them to Jack.

""Jack, I don't know how to tell you this…ah…it's …shit." Owen slumped, "Jack, you're not pregnant. It looks like you are definitely at the end of a cycle and what you are feeling is your usual period starting. I don't know what to tell you."

"So…oh gods" Jack gasped with horror, "Are you telling me I've lost it?"

"Mate, I'm telling you there never was one!" Owen sighed as Tosh concurred, apologising as well.

"But the signs were all there. I was …I mean …it felt so real" Jack said as he sat there in shock.

"The most I can say is maybe it's one of those sympathetic ones. A Phantom. You are close to someone who is really pregnant and with your cycle full blown it grabbed and made you think it was you too. Could it be the Lilacs?"

"Maybe" Jack said faintly "Gods. I feel such a fool. I was so sure."

"Yeah, well …sorry mate. I know it's not good news and all I can say is that it all looks healthy. You should have no problem conceiving again but …right now it's a non-event" Owen patted his arm, feeling genuinely sad as he knew what Tosh was going through as well.

"Oh gods" Jack said softly, a new horror occurring to him, "Ianto! Oh gods, he is…shit."

"Oh shit" Andy huffed, "Gonna have to eat some crow there big guy. You know he was crying when he left. Looked like death warmed up."

"I…I need him" Jack sniffled, "He is going to be so pissed at me for how I've been behaving. Ah shit."

Rhys called out from the hub floor, "Tosh? I can't find him, how do you work the tracker thing again?"

Tosh slumped and theatrically stomped up the stairs as Owen smiled softly, watching her go. She had really come out of her shell lately, well, since they finally stopped beating around the bush and she had some moxie, that bird of his.

"Jack" she called out, "Ianto's left the city."

"What?" Jack was moving quickly, "Where is he?"

"I don't know, I have to wait for another satellite to come around" she muttered as her fingers flew across the keyboard, "He's definitely not in the Cardiff area."

"Ah shit" Jack slumped, rubbing at his belly before realising what he was doing. "How do I tell him?"

"He was talking about the nursery" Andy sighed, "How he was going to update it so Byrd could share with her baby brother. He showed me this little crib shaped like a row boat, he had seemed excited about it."

"He did?" Jack said softly, looking back and remembering Ianto approaching with a book that had little page markers in it and he had told him he was tired. Ianto had politely placed the book done and left.

Jack went to his office and found it still sitting in the coffee table, over a week since Ianto had tried to show him and he opened it to find not only a little row boat but an airplane bed that had also been circled with 'Captain's No1' pencilled under it.

Ianto had been nesting and he hadn't even noticed.

Jack flicked through the book as page after page of lovely little things flipped past. Ianto had wanted to share with this him, talk over and possibly buy right down to a sweet little hoodie with a buillt in sling so the baby could be cuddled and carried in the winter months. Ianto had written '3?' next to it.

OK, so now Jack felt like shit.

Then he came to the last page where Ianto had been writing names and was shocked to see that they had all been scribbled out. Some had been quite cute.

The only one not scribbled out had struck at Jack's heart as he looked at it.

'Franklin Jackson.'

Ianto had been prepared to let Jack name their son without any part of himself in there.

Hormonal or not, Jack started to cry softly.

What a fucking mess.


	14. removing head from arse are we Jack?

Jack was on the verge of frantic now, Ianto had clearly run.

Why?

Jack went over his actions and felt even worse as each harsh word and sneer came back to haunt him. Not even with child. He went home and hoped Ianto might be there despite what Tosh said and spent a few minutes crying in his mother's arms as she crooned and confided that it was not uncommon for a 'sympathy baby' to occur in a community.

It must be the Lilacs.

When Tosh finally contacted him and said it was the Cabin he could have wept with relief, heading out with different versions of an explanation in his head.

When he got there, they all flew out the door as he stood watching Ianto.

Ianto was sitting on the porch, squished in a corner as the rain beat down on him staring into a spot over the lake.

"Ianto?" Jack said softly, crouching to stroke the hair away from his brow. "Sweetheart?"

Ianto blinked and seemed to frown as he focused on Jack, then his face crumbled as he started to cry. Babbling started. Jack couldn't understand all of it, but Ianto was apologising for being a poor mate. For not being supportive, for not being excited enough. For complaining about his backache.

"I wanted this baby so much" Jack sobbed as he rushed to fill the copper bath with hot water, "I wanted us to hold a new life, another precious miracle that made the last year as non-existent to us as it is to everyone else."

"Oh Cariad, I am so sorry."

"No baby" Jack panted, his heart twisting, "My darling, it's OK. I love you, you are a good man, a good mate and I love you."

Jack undressed him and let the wet things fall to the floor with a squelching sound as he stared with horror at Ianto's back, the livid bruising was black, purple and blue at the edges.

"Oh Ianto" he sighed softly, "Oh darling."

"I told you I hit the edge of a table when I flew back, thank Gods you were OK" Ianto sighed, cringing and moving away as Jack prodded at the mess.

"I dismissed it, I ignored your pain, oh darling how will you ever forgive me" Jack slumped as he watched Ianto shakily climb into the hot water and groan as it crept up his poor back.

As Ianto lay there Jack stood and keyed his coms, "Owen?"

"Yeah"

"When you scanned Ianto's back, how bad was the bruising?" Jack asked knowing the answer would be none or very little.

"Just a red mark, why?"

"I'm sending a photo I just took" Jack sighed as he sent it through from the phone and Owen swore softly.

"Hang on, I'm pulling them up, shit. I only checked a surface scan, I need to pull up the deep tissue scan I did as well, I never thought to check that. Fuck."

"Get back to me when you have it" Jack signed off and went back in to find Ianto climbing out.

"Jack? When did you get here?" Ianto frowned and Jack sagged with relief as the fugue seemed to have lifted, puling Ianto towards the fire so he could carefully dry him.

He got to his waist and Ianto pulled away, complaining that it hurt and he walked over to climb into the bed and roll away from him facing the wall.

"Tired Cariad, so fucking tired" Ianto sighed as he settled and Jack held back the desire to talk to him, settling in with him and cuddling instead, hoping sleep would help Ianto be more rational in the morning.

It was early hours of the morning when Jack woke to find Ianto frantically pulling at him, almost beside himself as he whimpered and repeated his name.

"Babe?"

"Call Owen, oh god, I need Owen, I… darling…please…no.."

Jack became more aware and looked down to find his period had started and he was leaking into the bed, then he realised what was going on in Ianto's head.

"No, Ianto, it's OK" he tried to grab his blood covered hands as he patted bedding between Jack's legs and sobbed frantically, "Ianto, there is no baby."

"NO!" Ianto wailed with horror, "Please no!"

"Oh gods" Jack sobbed as Ianto pulled at his hair, screaming down the phone for Owen and saying it was a miscarriage.

"Blood, so much, Owen please. MY BABY, please" Ianto was screaming then he dropped the hone and clambered up to kiss Jack passionately, "I love you. Oh my love, I'm so sorry. This is my fault. My fault. I am such a bad mate. Sorry baby. I didn't deserve it, see? I had these visions of him, your smile and maybe my eyes. Oh Gods, I wanted him so much, is this my punishment?"

"Ianto" Jack swallowed as he pulled Ianto into his arms, "Darling it's OK. It's my cycle. I was wrong, it was a false positive. I was never with child, I was so deranged, so determined to give you a second baby that I talked myself into it. Ianto?"

Ianto stared at him silently, his frown as he tried to digest what Jack was saying made him almost angry in appearance and it was only the fact that Jack knew how much he loved him that kept him talking.

"I love you, I'm sorry. We're OK. It's OK"

Ianto had then slumped into his arms as they wept for the life that never was.

Jack's hand finding the heat in Ianto's back as he held him gently.

"Forgive me" Jack whispered.

"Oh Cariad, always" Ianto's whisper seemed a balm.

The coms crackled and Owen's voice came through.

"Is he OK?"

"Oh Owen" Jack sighed, "None of us are."

"Stay there, I'm half way there!" Owen barked, driving the SUV like he was an immortal ex-time agent.

This was not over.


	15. meltdown

Owen entered the cabin and found Ianto still in the bed, looking forlorn as Jack held him.

"Bleeding started?" Owen asked and Jack nodded, a large tear rolling down his face and Owen sighed as he pulled the bedding back and to Jack's surprise it was Ianto he moved towards, examining his…well…nether regions.

"What are you doing?" Jack hissed, "My periods has started, not his ya muppet."

"Oh thank god" Owen slumped with relief, then reached out to place a hand on Ianto's stomach gently.

"Ow'n?" Ianto slurred, "Ma back hurts, really."

"I know mate" Owen answered, "I am so sorry for bushing you off, things have been so hard lately and it's no excuse but I didn't listen to you, I should have done a better job here. Thank fuck you are OK."

Jack shifted in the bed and they gently rolled Ianto towards him so Owen could check his back, cursing softly as the harsh bruising looked even worse in the dim light of the cabin.

"OK, I am going to give you something localised, OK?" Owen said softly, "It's a cream that will freeze the area but not go too deep. OK?"

"Why do you keep saying OK!" Ianto huffed against Jack's chest, "It's pissing me off."

"Sorry" Owen muttered, carefully applying the cream and Ianto moaned as he finally felt some relief.

"Right, I'm going to fold the back seats down so we can put up the air mattress, I don't want to shake things up any more than I have to, we are in a delicate phase here and I don't want to shake him up any more than I have to, O….shit. Sorry." Owen snorted as he almost said OK again and a weak smile from Ianto told him that he had caught it.

Jack got up and padded himself as he dressed and followed Owen out, watching as he fussed about in the back of the SUV.

"Owen? How bad is it?" Jack felt like shit, both physically and mentally as he slumped against the veranda watching.

"We need to take it slow, he's in …..I'm repeating myself aren't' I!" Owen slid to look back at Jack, "Jack, I don't have the time to talk about this and I don't want you spinning out on me. When we get back and I can do a better scan I will have some answers for you both. Really, he is the one I should talk to first."

"I am the boss here!" Jack said angrily and Owen looked back at him again and snorted.

"I am a Doctor, I know it's something we joke about but really …that MD bit is real and anything to do with his health is going to be his decision in what to tell you, understand?" Owen snarled, then exited and stood to look at Jack.

"Right, gently now, let's not jostle them about" Owen said as he headed back into the house and Jack was two steps up when he registered the Freudian slip.

'Them'

Jack felt the world tip on its axis and his mouth went dry about the same time his stomach threatened to expel its contents.

"Come on, I can't lift him on my own ya fucking Nancy!" Owen yelled and Jack shook himself, heading in to gently life his husband as if he was spun gold.

"Easy darling, I have you" Jack crooned, unable to stop himself from glancing down at the exposed stomach and dammed if there was a small bump.

Jack didn't want to betray Owen and his mistaken admission so he struggled to stay calm as he carried the precious cargo to the SUV and settled Ianto in the bedding.

He couldn't keep it in.

"Owen I need help inside a minute please" Jack said calmly and Ianto immediately tried to sit up, crying out with pain.

"Easy baby, easy. Lay down, it's OK" Jack soothed.

"What's wrong, what is it." Ianto's eyes were wide with fear, "Is there something wrong with you that you're not telling me?"

"Oh baby. Yes there is something wrong with me. I forgot what an arsehole I am" Jack sighed as he stroked his love's cheek, "I am just upset and need to vent, I don't want you to see me be a douche bag so I am going to go inside to vent and Owen will have to be there because I need someone to shout at, OK?"

Ianto relaxed and his relief was evident and he smiled softly, "As long as you are OK Cariad. Remember, you are my douche bag."

"I will be OK as soon as you are" Jack assured him, "I had a…sort of baby brain thing happening where I went full dickhead, but it's over now. Yeah?"

Ianto smiled happily as he settled back and squeezed Jack's hand, "Hurry back, I really like it when you're not being a dickhead."

Jack laughed, even as the first tears threatened and he headed into the cabin, followed by Owen who squeaked as he was lifted off his feet by his shirt and Jack shook him before letting him go, Owen collapsed to the floor and stared up at him as he snarled down, "He is the one having a baby. The sympathy pains are for him. HIM!"


	16. yes, we knew it

"Yeah" Owen sighed as he leaned back against the wall, "I checked the scans again the deep tissue scan showed an anomaly. I am such a fuckwit that it took me a few minutes to recognise a little heart beating. I'm sorry. He came to me complaining and I didn't listen, you were going full ape on him and as always I went with you on it, like a fucking sheep I followed you. I checked the bloods again and it seems that I Harkness-Jones and J Harkness-Jones look the same on the screen in that stupid little font."

"Yeah. I was an arse hat too!" Jack sighed, offering his hand and helping Owen to his feet. "What now?"

"Now we try to keep him calm, we get him back to the hub and I try to work out how to fucking help him" Owen counted the three things on his fingers and then held up a fourth, "And you crawl over broken glass for a while because you were a total prick!"

"Agreed" Jack sighed scrubbing his face, he went back outside where he found Ianto had pulled himself to the door, it must have hurt like hell and he was trying to get out.

"Hey, hey, what is all this?" Jack crooned, helping him back into the bedding.

"What's wrong, you were shouting, Cariad, tell me what the fuck is going in!" Ianto was frantic and Jack kissed him gently.

"Hormones, I'm still coming down and needed to be a bastard to someone, didn't want to do it to you anymore because you are too bloody wonderful" Jack said and Ianto smiled softly as he reached out to cup his cheek.

"Oh Jack, you will tell me when you are ready right?" Ianto begged, "We promised no more secrets."

"This is something Owen has to check and then talk to you before I can even get involved" Jack sighed, "I respect you and your body darling."

Ianto settled back into the bedding and frowned softly, knowing that whatever was going in it was scaring the crap out of Jack.

They reached the Hub and once again Jack carefully carried him, not to the med-bay but to their room where he settled him with a gentleness that was now really setting his teeth on edge and he laid waiting for the bombshell to drop, wondering if Byrd was OK.

Finally Owen stormed in with the scanner and Ianto felt himself go cold as Owen deftly placed it over his stomach and huffed, fiddling with it as he told Jack to stuff off without looking in his direction.

"No, I want him to stay" Ianto said as he felt a strange calm descend, "This is his baby too. Right?"

Owen glanced at him and back to the scanner as everything fell into place and the bombshell was so loud as it exploded in Ianto's head that he was rendered deaf and dumb as he stared mutely at Owen.

"Looks like he either fell while you were away or was just as you left" Owen muttered, "Looking at the age of the wee guy though ….I would hazard more likely while you were gone."

"Had to be, Ianto ….it was longer for Ianto" Jack glanced at him nervously and Ianto blinked as he started to come awake again. "Ianto, must be ….shit. It's barely been three months."

"Twelve weeks, yeah, looks about right" Owen nodded, "A little survivor, lucky. The little one looks like it latched on somewhere near the top and front of …whatever this is …fuck is this a womb?"

"No wonder he's so tired" Jack realised with horror, "He's not fully transformed, although he's in male form he's kept some of the female to allow the baby to live. Jesus, if he's transformed all the way he might have lost it."

"And I would suggest no more Yan for a while, gotta give this one every chance" Owen nodded, then watched as Jack got off the bed and started to pace.

"He knew!" he snarled, "That bastard…he knew…all along he's been right there watching me be a complete bastard and he knew what was going on….the wrist strap to protect the baby ….son of a ….when I see the Doctor I am going to kiss him. Then kill him!"

"Wibbly-wobbly" Ianto sighed softly as it all made sense, "You're right Cariad. He's known all along it was me not you but for some reason he felt he couldn't say. This needed to happen? Why?"

"Because of the placement if the foetus" Owen huffed, "Whether as Yan or Ianto, this is a high risk pregnancy for you. If we hadn't picked it up you would have lost him in no time. Jesus, bed rest! Fuck you are so going to hate this but at least until he is along enough to survive."

"No!" Jack said angrily, "Bed rest forever!"

"Jack" Ianto sighed, "Please, I'm so tired."

"Sorry" Jack whispered, climbing back onto the bed gingerly and gathering him into his arms, "Sleep baby. Then our daughter can come and tell you one of her stories."

Ianto smiled at the thought of their daughter babbling her nonsense with such a sincere look, her little hands waving around like her Daddy while in full story mode.

Jack rubbed Ianto's shoulders as the shock started to wear off and the reality set in.

Ianto was pregnant.

What a wonderful gift.


	17. squirming yet?

Jack had plenty of time to think about his actions as Ianto slept the clock around, finally feeling comfort as the epidural Owen had administered went to work.

Owen also had time to think and curse as he went back over his own actions the last few months and Ianto's fading complaints.

When Ianto woke it was to Tosh sitting by the bed reading quietly and she smiled as she watched his eyes flutter open.

"Hey Deja vu" she grinned, "We have to stop meeting like this."

Ianto huffed softly and moved gingerly, pleased to find some freezing still there, "Gods, it was lovely once that needle did its work."

"He's angry he didn't think of it before he moved you, he is so upset" Tosh said softly, "I've not seen Owen this angry at himself on ages."

"Not his fault, not like any of us had this one pegged, well except a certain Timelord who is fortunate he likes running because a certain Captain as going to chase him with a big fucking stick" Ianto laughed softly and yawned.

"Hey, my ears are burning" Jack said as he entered and smiled, "Hey. Awake? How about something to eat and then our wee Byrdie comes to see her Tadda, yeah?"

Ianto blinked at the babyish way he was talking and then smiled slowly as he realised that he had him right where he wanted him and boy oh boy, could he make him pay for all the times he screamed at him while his own pregnancy raged.

Of course, this is Ianto so you know as well as I that he could never really do it, but imagining was nice for a few moments before he nodded meekly, "Please Cariad."

Jack nodded and fussed with the covers as he watched Tosh leave to get the food and then he leaned in to stroke Ianto's cheek, once again apologising and telling him how sweet he looked against the pillows.

"Thank you Cariad, I am feeling so rested" Ianto smiled as he felt himself relaxing more, "I don't want to be a burden."

"Are you kidding?" Jack huffed, "You are having my baby, you…I mean…what more can I say? I am almost half crazed with thoughts of what may have happened to you, my beloved sweetling. Gods, I will never be able to apologise enough for my stupidity."

""Oh Jack" Ianto sighed happily blushing as Jack's hand started to slide under the covers, then feeling surprise as it stopped over his little bump.

Oh.

Jack was now talking to his stomach, crooning at it and then to Ianto's immense horror Jack started to sing to it.

Now don't get me wrong, he has a wonderful voice but the sight on him on his knees singing to Ianto's stomach was a bit…well…naff. Ianto felt himself bristling and made a small noise, "I am really hungry my love."

Jack was on his feet touching his coms to ask if the food was ready, his beloved was hungry, goddess love it all!

Ianto watched Tosh enter and then watched Jack check the food and then settle on the edge of the bed. Spoon feeding might have been a bit stupid and Ianto might have opened his mouth to tell him to stop a few times, only to have another spoonful of Chinese shoved into it…well, it was yummy and he was hungry and….

OK.

So, maybe Ianto was enjoying it. A wee bit?

"Oh Jack, so full. I don't want to squash the baby" Ianto said with big eyes, watching as Jack's face softened and the spoon mercifully went away.

"Anything else my lovely baby maker?" Jack gushed.

Ianto considered.

Hmmm.

"Well, it's silly really" Ianto laughed at himself, rolling his eyes in a comical way, then he plucked at the bed covers as if nervous.

"Potty?"

"No."

"Sponge bath?" Jack said softly, his hand cupping Ianto's chin to being his face to eye level, "Darling?"

"Well …if it's not too much to ask, I hate to ask" Ianto had Jack squirming to please now, his eyes wide and his mouth slightly open as he tried to anticipate whatever his love needed.

Anything"

"Well …" Ianto sighed, "Oh Cariad I don't want another fight about it. I just …all those cats. I worry. You know I'm a stupid head but …well…with another baby I shall need you and your Mama so much and..all those cats…"

Jack stood and nodded, pacing as he wrung his hands.

"Fleas. Worms. Yes, I see our point. They are shitting in the garden too" Jack swing to face him, "I'll talk to Mama. She will just have to stop collecting them. The neighbours can take some in, we'll whittle them down. Promise love. I know you love them too but our child will need Mama's attention. She is the Heathwarmer after all!"

Ianto settled in the bed and smiled serenely. "You'll talk to her?"

"Yeah" Jack groaned, grimacing at the thought.

Ok.

So maybe he was going to make Jack pay …. A little bit.


	18. Dudes!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://postimages.org/)

Jack wrung his hands as he followed his Mama around the house, trying to get up the courage to tell her about the cats.

"Mama, the kitty cats, um…."

"I know!" she gushed, looking out the kitchen window, "Look at them all enjoying the sun. Such silly billys."

Jack walked over to look out the window and frowned as he looked at a sea of cats, at least thirty of them all laying as if dead on the side path to the house. It looked like a crime scene from some weird other world massacre.

Little limbs askew and faces all serene as they lay in silence repose.

"Are they OK?" he asked as he noted not a single one moving.

"I uncovered the catnip" she laughed, "That's not a grass strip along the fence darling, it's the catnip. Look at them, all SOOO happy to have some to sniff. I only do once a week or they eat it all, poor plants need to recover after each love fest. They won't move until this afternoon when I go out with nums and then they all act like they haven't eaten in weeks. I have to be careful because they bite each other in their excitement."

Jack saw the scene through Ianto's eyes and knew that if he saw this he would blow a gasket, internally of course.

It would be a total neck grabbing pace of doom.

"Mama, you do know Catnip is a drug?" Jack asked calmly, "You are like…a drug dealer making them high."

Dahlia turned from the dishes in the sink and stared at him, the bubbles from the buds slowly sliding down her arms as she gaped.

"Mama, some of these cats aren't even ours. They are….freeloaders, coming in and pushing our cats out of the way. Where are your oranges? Hmmm? Hiding because they are getting bullied?" Jack played the only cards he could since Ianto had made it crystal clear that he didn't want her to know about the baby, telling Jack she would fuss and he didn't want to make any more work for her when she did so much.

Jack had found it sweet the way Ianto had worried about her, gripping Jack's hand as he whispered that she was there….all the time. He just wanted her to let him have a little space, to relax a wee bit. So sweet. Ianto wanting Mama to relax. He was so glad they were getting long.

Dahlia huffed and looked out again, this time seeing the cats that were not wearing collars.

"Mama, Byrdie is starting to stand on her own, it's only a matter of time before she is toddling" Jack said, repeating Ianto's words that had been purred to him earlier along with that gently stroking hand, "What if she gets out there in the sun for a lovely little look at her Nainny's pretty flowers and wanders into one of their shitting spots? There are diseases and things that could make her really sick. Some people have even died!"

Her eyes bugged out as she stared and Jack sat, pulling over the laptop to show her medical files Owen had provided, showing the bad things that could happen. Good thing he had these for him. Owen isn't usually so organised.

"Why do we let them in!" she demanded with horror. "They could kill her!"

"Mama, a bee could kill her if it stung in the right place," Jack crooned, "It's not that they are evil or anything, but we need to be sensible. Our children are what is important, fluffies can be trained to behave but not if there are too many to work with."

"Oh dear" she sighed.

"Look, let's get a sensible number, yeah? The neighbours can come collect theirs, the lilacs can decide and the leftovers can be offered within the community, you know they all love coming here to see them as you did such a good job with them" Jack begged, "Time to share them so others can have the love too."

"Yeah" she brightened, "Oh sweetheart, you are right. Everyone deserves a fluff!"

Jack sagged with relief as it seemed to have worked, feeling terrible about having to speak strongly to her but Ianto was right.

Their children needed to come first.


	19. Dahlia Ponders

Ianto wanted to go home to his own bed and he knew his little girl would be happier as well as safer there.

"Jack, if we didn't have Byrd then this would make sense to stay here, but the fact is that we already have a baby girl who needs her routine and her own home" Ianto sighed softy, "I want to be with her, she wants to be at home."

"But…are you sure?" Jack grimaced, rubbing his hands together.

"We could work out a roster" Tosh said from the corner of the bed where she was sitting primly, "Ianto will not be alone. We can sort it out. I really think he will sleep better in his own bed, you know he worries about everyone when he's here."

"I guess, Owen?" Jack swung to the deciding vote and Owen smiled as he patted Jack's arm.

"I don't see why not mate. The bedroom is fucking huge, I can set up some gear for monitoring and such, let him have his comfort. I am happy to stay some nights, the others will too. Your Mama will love fussing over all of us and it will help us all bond more as a team."

Ianto silently thanked Owen as Jack deflated, seeing that Owen was right about the team thing and nodded.

"Me and Jack will go ahead and sort it all out, yeah?" Owen crooned, patting Ianto's foot, "This avo we can cart you home."

"Thank you Owen" Ianto beamed and Jack watched the sun come out, knowing Ianto was likely to sleep better.

"And Mama?" Jack asked softly, "You still don't want to tell her yet?"

"I will, when I am ready" Ianto sighed, "I just… I need a little time to get my head around this before running the gauntlet of questions she will have. And advice."

"Ah" Jack sighed, knowing his Mother would be full of it…advice.

At least he knew some of the cats had already gone, a near thing as one of the adopters had taken a liking to Lucifer, Ianto's little black kitten he pretended not to like and Jack had calmly swapped it for another, placing him in the bedroom out of the way.

Ever since the journey home from the adoption centre with its paw in Ianto's sock this kitty had been close to Ianto, following him about the house chirping and showing interest. More than once Jack had caught Ianto explaining something to it in his warm tones as if he had another baby. The little black face turned up to him listening with interest had been sweet to peek on.

Jack knew it would secretly break Ianto's heart to find him gone, even if he pretended not to care.

Jack recognised this survival technique, having used it himself sometimes. Ianto was afraid of losing the little kitty, wondered if Ianto had one as a child and its death had made him wary.

Little Lucifer had a pleasant nature, with bouts of insanity that had them laughing. The day he had leapt into the bubble bath and instead of screaming and running off he had poked his head up in the bubbles and blinked at them like it was normal.

Ianto had laughed until he choked.

Jack knew the bed was comfortable, his own pregnancy spent in it quite a bit so he rearranged furniture and they set up monitors as Dahlia watched, scolding Jack for moving anything heavy until he reminded her that there was not baby in him, remember?

Dahlia had been confused by this, watching as Jack had covertly slid some baby books by the bed and she wondered if they were intending to try for another or maybe the Lilacs were going to make them one.

She headed over to the Lilac House, stepping though the sea of cats that greeted her, followed by the tiny Lilac baby that had been born at Christmas and she scooped up the baby with glee, calling out as she went in to see the pregnant Lilac laying back in some pillows with a cat getting stroked within an inch of its life.

"Are you OK darlings?" she crooned and the Lilacs shivered with delight as they told her that the 'cooking' was going well.

Dahlia laughed loving their misuse of words, something she knew she had done at first and she settled in for a cup of tea, they make lovely tea.

Soon several cats settled on her as she told the Lilacs about Jack's non-baby and they made sympathetic noses, even patting her arm as they offered her one.

"No, no!" she laughed happily, "I'm too old for all that. I am a Hearthwarmer now, so sweet of you to offer though."

She did hope for a baby soon though, another little gift of love in this place of wonders.

Byrd shouldn't grow up alone.


	20. Peaches and the Devil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://postimages.org/)

Ianto was so relieved to find his home intact, a new archway erected and some jasmine vines planted for the slow work of regrowing his beloved entrance.

Ianto knew Jack had done this and resisted the tears prickling, thinking back to Jack's emotional jags and feeling bad that he wasn't more supportive, even with Jack constantly telling him he had been wonderful.

Byrd had been snatched up by Mama and taken away, leaving Jack and Ianto to their own devices as the back door slammed, telling them that Byrd was going to Grandma's house. She loved it there with all the cats and toys she was allowed to scatter everywhere without Taddy scolding her to pick up what she was finished with.

Now settled in the bed with a soft sigh of contentment, he watched Lucifer stalk into the room and he went to each doorway, peeking around them before approaching the bed. His limbs were straight and his tail up, except for the top which crooked back and Ianto was reminded of a panther as he watched the little cat seek Jack out or at least his coat to sniff with his mouth open and teeth on display.

"He's downstairs getting us some snacks" Ianto said as he watched the little cat daintily leap up onto the bed. "So is the coat. Why are you so nervy? Come on sweetums, scratchles?"

Ianto moved his hand in a clawlike manner and the little cat squeaked as he shot under it, enjoying the massage that was on offer, always loving those fingers. Ianto hummed softly as a little squeaky purr stared and Lucifer leaned into the loves.

"I wondered where he was" Jack grinned as he came back carrying a tray, "I got him some nibbles too, you know he doesn't eat much."

"He's a dwarf" Ianto replied, "I keep telling you, cats come in all shapes and sizes and he is a little man. Aren't you. The gingers are twice his size the buggers."

"The Lilacs took them" Jack supplied, along with a plate of sandwiches, "Apparently Lucifer here doesn't much care for another home and kept coming back."

"Black cats don't" Ianto replied, "They just want somewhere to people watch. Preferably a sun patch or completely dark hidey-hole where they can't be seen. No grey areas for this fella, all or nothing, right little devil?"

Jack smiled as he watched Ianto take a chicken sandwich and hum as he took the first bite. As Ianto chewed the little cat calmly bit into the other end of the sandwich and extracted a bite of chicken, settling to chew as thoughtfully as his beloved master.

"Nice" Ianto said around a mouthful and Jack took off his boots and settled back too, groaning as he relaxed, "You know…ummmm…the Lilacs…..oooo lettuce too? …..we need to get them a bigger expanse of water I think. Now they have expanded their family, maybe a swimming pool?"

Jack watched as Ianto devoured the sandwich, his sentences interrupted with exclamations of delight, moans and grabby motions as Jack offered a milkshake were all so cute to his eyes and his heart was almost bursting as he provided for his mate, watching as Ianto accepted and appreciated his efforts.

This was going to be different, this was going to be a trial and Jack knew it. A stubborn mate who hated asking for help but would desperately need it, a mate who would rather carry on with frustration than appear weak. Goddess give me strength, this was going to be hard for both of them and Jack wished it was him with child instead, if only to spare Ianto the discomforts and embarrassments he knew were coming.

Jack also made a mental note to have a word with Owen. In male form, it's a lot harder to carry and now the Doctors warnings were ringing in his ears as he realised this form would be housing their child for some time.

Ianto had enough of the sandwiches and pushed them away, making Jack count and see he had only eaten three sections. He had hoped for at least six. But then …he was tired.

"Was gonna cut you some apple but then I saw the peaches Mama had in the bowl" Jack said softly as he handed Ianto a bowl of freshly sliced peaches and Ianto's eyes widened.

"Oh Cariad, yum" Ianto sighed, "Good for the bowels too."

"Yeah" Jack said dreamily as he plucked a slice of peach and held it up, watching those lips close around it and his fingers.

"Byrd. Think she needs a proper bedroom so the nursery can be refurbished?" Ianto asked, then blinked as he realised he had lost his mate, the dopey grin and soft eyes as Jack gushed and held out another slice.

Ah well, talk later then.

Ianto leaned in to let Jack taste the peach as well.

No kiss was ever so sweet.


	21. Take some time

Ianto woke to find Jack gone and his mother fussing about the room, clucking her tongue.

"Where did Jack go?"

"Some of us need to work young man" she huffed, "You've been quite busy yourself and I thought the cabin would be a lovely we break for you but you've come back worse than ever. I know it's been a few months but maybe the two of you need another getaway. Goddess knows you never know when to quit."

"I am feeling run down" Ianto admitted, "Jack wants me to take a few days off and just snooze, lounge about and try to settle a bit."

"Oh good!" she gushed, "I have a new project I wanted to talk to you about but you never seem to be about. I know Jack wouldn't understand, you know how men are."

Ianto blinked and then stifled a laugh behind a cough as she turned to leave, "I'll bring you something to eat, you have a lie in darling."

"Thank you" Ianto called after her and then started to giggle to himself.

Lucifer was asleep, his little belly exposed and his wee nipples looked like pimples as they poked through the black fur. Ianto resisted the urge to rub that belly, knowing it would wake him so he settled for looking at the ceiling and wondering if Jack was warm enough.

"Here we go" Dahlia crooned, entering with a tray and then she made a small noise, "Oh, sounds like someone's awake from her nap."

Ianto sat up and chewed on a chicken sandwich as Dahlia returned with a little imp, placing her on the bed where she squealed and promptly crawled to Ianto.

"Ah, you!" Ianto said with mock severity. "You still here?"

She laughed like she knew what he was saying and then she snuggled against him.

"I'll go get her bottle, looks like she might want a cuddle with her Taddy" Dahlia said, watching Ianto croon and fuss happily.

Ianto pulled over a nappy and changed his little girl, noticing that her knees seemed less chubby and he wondered if she was starting to grow again, these growth spurts meaning more clothes. He clipped up the onesie and let her slip into the bed with him where she babbled happily, her little hands used to help with the story of nonsense, just like her Dada.

"You are so much like your father" he said happily, "My little rubbish talker. Yes you are!"

She laughed and then cooed as Dahlia entered with a bottle, offering it to her and watched Ianto settle her in his arm.

"You need anything else?" Dahlia asked, her desire to fuss overwhelming.

"Well, you know that old bathrobe Jack makes fun of? Could you possibly wash it for me? It has a funny smell, I think that Jack has been wearing it again" Ianto suggested, finally coming up with something after thinking hard and she took off with glee.

That should keep her busy for a while.

Ianto knew he couldn't keep the baby from her much longer, she was going to smell it out sooner or later but at least for now Jack had created enough of a seed in her mind to think he was just tired.

He looked down at his dumpling and wondered if she would welcome the new life. Surely she would, right?

He heard the SUV come up the drive and smiled, coming up the side of the house meant he probably had Tosh with him and Ianto smiled happily at the thought of a cuddle with her, voices calling out as they came inside.

Yes.

Tosh.

The door opened and she swept in with some files and a grin, the PDA slipping but Jack caught it.

"I have a project, an idea you can help with" she gushed as she climbed into Jack's side, "I was thinking that if we can get another look at those photos you took for Unit's secure archives, we might work out what shit they don't have and will swap for."

Ianto watched Jack scoop up their daughter and wink before wandering off to find his mother and the two friends cuddled happily as they plotted.

"Mama?" Jack found his mother in the back garden playing with a cat, flicking a ball and watching it run back to drop it and wait, like a dog.

"What's wrong love?" she asked without looking up.

"I missed you" Jack said simply and she shone as she stood to give him a kiss.

"Is he really OK?" she asked and Jack felt a twist as he grimaced, unable to lie but bound by his promise not to tell.

"He will be, just needs time" he finally said and she nodded, happy with the answer.

Byrd squealed to be let down and he placed her down on the seat his mother had warmed and she clapped as she looked up at the clouds passing and then looked to him as she pointed at the sky.

"Yes little Byrdie" he crooned, "We have time. It passes too."


	22. A little Devil in the bed

"Jack?"

Ianto let his head fall back as he listened for that squeaky step on the stairs and after a few minutes he huffed and tried again, louder this time as he might be outside, "JACK"

He flopped in the bedding and then the squeak he was listening for came so he put on a contrite face as Jack entered the room.

"I'm sorry Cariad, I know I'm a pain but…it doesn't matter. You were busy weren't you!" he sighed and let his head loll to look at the wall morosely, "Don't worry. I'm being a sook."

Jack made a small noise as he shuffled closer, reaching out for his hand, "Anything love. What's wrong? Back rub? Are your feet warm enough? I have those lovely warm socks you got me for Byrdie's time, remember?"

"I'm sorry." Ianto pouted, "It's stupid."

"No tell me" Jack sank to his knees by the bed, clearly about to beg if need be for his little baby maker.

"Well, you see it took so long to get comfortable in this spot and the pillows are just right how you did them for me because you are so good to me and…well …my left ankle is so itchy but it I …."

Jack was tearing at the bedding with a serious growl, finding the offending foot and gently rubbing at it, "Like this?"

"No nails, I need nails, a bit higher my love" Ianto whimpered, putting a little hitch in his voice as Jack whimpered too.

"AHHHHHHH" Ianto said decadently moaning as he reached out and Jack seized the hand like it was a lifeline, kissing those fingers that did such naughty things.

"Better darling?" he gushed, "Anything else. Hungry? I can make you a sandwich, or…or…I'll check if the jelly is set, yeah? Blackberry."

Jack was half rising when Ianto's sigh stopped him.

"What were you doing?" Ianto asked.

"I was out in the garden with Byrd and Mama. The wee beast loves watching the kitties and now there are a lot less she can be on the ground without getting mobbed like a movie star at a film premiere."

Ianto laughed at the image of their daughter drowning in cats and looked up at Jack with huge eyes, "Lucifer isn't down there is he? I do miss his wee purr."

"I'll find him love" Jack said with his chest puffing out as he shot out the door, causing Ianto to call his name weakly.

"Babe?" Jack flew back into the room so fast he hit the bed, "OK?"

"I ….I didn't get a kiss!"

Jack lit up as he leaned in and hummed, kissing Ianto gently with his hand stroking at his face, "My lovely mate, my beloved sweetling. My life."

"Better" Ianto sighed, his eyes fluttering shut.

"Right!" Jack said rising to leave again, "Jelly!"

"And Lucifer?" Ianto whimpered sadly.

"Oh my darling, don't cry. Daddy will get the kitty" Jack crooned, "I am all about getting the Pussy."

Ianto raised an eyebrow as he waited for Jack to catch up to himself in three…two …and the look of horror was amazing as Jack tried to correct himself.

"It's OK" Ianto said softly, "Nothing can resist you. Look at me, gone at hello."

Jack waltzed out of the room and soon Ianto could hear the faint calling of Lucifer's name as Jack hunted for him in the undergrowth, remembering that the little black demon likes to hide.

After a few minutes the blankets moved and a wee head popped up to blink at Ianto and squeak in question.

"It's OK darling" Ianto crooned, "Daddy is just being silly. Go back to sleep Lucy-furry-bum."

The cat burrowed back down to the spot by Ianto's' hip and Ianto soon felt the gentle paws stroking as the cat relaxed and kneaded against him.

He wondered if he might be hungry and looked at the clock, deciding to wait a little bit longer.

"LUCIFER!" Jack roared in a way that would ensure no cat wanted to come near him, almost frantic now as he once more fell to his knees to search for the little shit of a bastard furry shithead.

Ianto needed his cat.

Dahlia sat watching her son with open confusion and leaned forward to suggest he may be inside somewhere.

"IF you want to help, got check if the jelly is set. I want some chocolate mousse for after supper too if we have any mix left please Mama" Jack whined and she rose, happy to do something to help as he was getting quite upset for some reason.

Must be the non-baby. She knew he has wanted one so badly and his tears when telling her that he was not with child had broken her heart. He did seem happier lately, more blessed in his manner.

"LUCFER YOU CUNT OF A CAT"

Well, lately he seemed happy. She sighed as she shook her head and started to measure the chocolate mix wondering if he was having some sort of crisis.

It happened you know.

The men get to a certain age and have this epiphany, start changing their hair style, buy a flashy vehicle, acting like teenagers again. Mid-life crisis. That's what the magazine called it.

Dear goddess. Was he old enough for one of those?

Dahlia considered this and looked up as he entered the house with a defeated look on his face.

"Bastard is hiding from me. I'll take the jelly up and try and think of something else" he sighed as he thought of the Aston Martin sitting in the garage with its lone car seat for the princess. _Never gonna fit two in the back of that as well as nappy bags_ , "Gonna go out later to the car sales yards. Want to get a new car, the Austin Martin is too small for the family now and I want something nice and sleek."

She huffed as she wiped her hands and shook her head.

Definitely a mid-life crisis.

Next it will be a bloody earring or something.


	23. You can hide some things from some people, but you can't hide from Mama

Ianto was asleep.

Starfished across the bed as he snored softly and Jack gushed as he snuck closer, rubbing his hands together without even knowing he was doing it.

Jack checked the temperature was warm before carefully folding back the blankets to reveal the sweet spot.

Ianto's belly.

His belly button was starting to poke out and Jack was mesmerised as he leaned in to look at the alabaster skin as it stretched over the little bump. Thin blue lines, like a road map were visible just beneath the surface and Jack smiled as he saw the first sign of a stretch mark.

Awwww.

He retrieved the skin cream and gently wiped some over the mark, soothing the skin and encouraging it to grow and lessen any problems as he whispered gently to the baby what he was doing.

Wouldn't want to alarm the baby with a sudden poke.

Ianto sighed and the belly rose, then fell as Jack's eyes tracked the movement of his child and he grinned as he imagined his sweetling settling back to sleep along with its …his …it's a boy, Jack is sure of it…his dam.

There is movement at the corner of the room and he turned his head, thinking it was the kitty on the corner of the bed and he came face to face with his mother.

Dahlia had sunk to her knees as she stared silently at the bump and Jack looked back at Ianto with apology as another sigh told him Ianto had woken and knew she was there.

"Dahlia" Ianto said softly, "Where's Byrdie?"

"Asleep" she said softly, her eyes never leaving his bump and Ianto looked at Jack, seeing his distress. "It's OK Cariad. I know she was going to find out sooner or later."

"Mama, Ianto doesn't like touching or…" Jack stopped talking as Dahlia shot forward and shakily placed her hand on the bump, then gasped with glee.

"How far along are you!" she demanded, "What…my gods, your diet….what about…"

"MAMA!" Jack roared, making them all jump and Jack rushed to apologise to the bump for shouting, "Daddy didn't mean to scare you, sorry love."

"Ianto is finishing his first trimester, he's just striking three months" Jack preened, "That's why he's been so tired lately and been sleeping a lot. He's supposed to be on bed rest but keeps sneaking out of it when I go to work."

"There are things to be done" Ianto replied, "I take it easy but there is Byrd to consider. You cannot expect…"

"You are growing a life!" Dahlia scoffed, "What you want is secondary to my grandchild's needs. You will not leave his bed again!"

"Muskrat Jack" Ianto said flatly and Jack flinched.

"Mama, earth is different with…"

"Jackson! Earth doesn't have men having babies so don't try that!" she turned to him, "My baby and you kept it from me!"

"MY baby actually" Ianto was getting angry as he pushed himself to a sitting position and Jack realised he was about to get off the bed to argue.

"Mama. This is Ianto's baby, his pregnancy and he is calling the shots" Jack said firmly, folding his arms, "My beloved wants quiet, peaceful times and no fussing. I know I will do it anyway but I do try not to. He does not want extra work for you, he is so lovely that he worries about you taking on extra things for him. I have assured him that you will not rush about and tire yourself."

Ianto kept his mouth firmly shut as the urge to correct Jack was almost vomitous.

"The team are taking things in shifts, we are all making sure that he is rested, busy with his mind as work is brought in he can do here at home and there will be times he will want to sit up in the chair or even outside in the sun. I don't see why he can't still get around if he takes it easy. He knows his own body" Jack calmed as Dahlia nodded to show she was listening, "Please don't smother or scold. It is important that Ianto is calm and relaxed. This is a high risk one and …."

Her sharp intake of breath as her eyes widened told him he had chosen his words wrong and he didn't look at Ianto as he knew the 'stun gun glare' was probably employed.

"…So Owen is going to be here a lot more, maybe even stay over some nights to monitor bubba. We're on this. Ianto is on this. Please Mama. Byrd loves you so much and spending time with her Hearthwarmer at this stage in her life is so important." Jack thought he may have saved himself there, "Ianto was just saying to me that your cooking has gotten so good that he thought a wee party would be OK with you doing the catering. Just us, family and the team quietly celebrating the new baby becoming …once he is cleared by Owen that he is past the dangerous early stages."

"Oh!" Dahlia gasped, "A party?"

Jack finally looked at Ianto and saw that he was forgiven as his delicate hands rubbed the bump.

Dahlia went to leave and then swung back to address the bump, "Hearthwarmer has just the cake for your Tadda! It will taste so nice that it will make you jump like a little mousie in there! Oh, sugar. Are you allowed that now? Coffee? Didn't I read that you can't drink that? Oh, I need the Google thingiee now."

Ianto's look of horror was echoed as Jack realised his mother was about to clean the house of all the good stuff.

Ianto sighed.

He flopped back to starfish again as Jack face palmed.

* * *

 


	24. what's in a name

Ianto was excited, as was everyone else and he even forgave Jack for the large chair sitting in the space his chair had sat, before Dahlia's cat rescue that is.

It was huge, almost like a bed with enough room for two people to lay with their feet up and Ianto knew it would be nice as the pregnancy progressed. Also, a good argument that he could be downstairs where there were other people.

Tosh and Owen were nervously waiting, hands clasped together as the Lilacs were seen approaching across the lawn and Dahlia let them in, all of them rushing to Ianto with gleeful chirps as they reached for his bump.

Ianto reluctantly folded back the blanket on his legs so the bump was exposed and they all purred happily, sounding like huge cats. Definitely cat people these ones, they even emulated their pets now.

Rhys was also craning to see and looking furtively at Ianto until he gave in and nodded, so he shot forward and reached out to touch the belly with wonder.

"Amazing" he said softly, "A real little baby in there. Christ mate, like…wow."

Ianto smiled at him lovingly and then watched as one of the Lilacs stood back and chirped.

Then the oldest child entered with a large box, supposedly containing something.

"Oh my goddess, they've had it already?" Ianto asked with shock.

"Last night I heard splashing and purring" Jack said excitedly, "I kinda thought that was it, why I invited everyone here tonight for our little party. I was counting in my head and the times are right."

Tosh accepted the box with wide eyes, then Owen shuffled closer to her, "Come on love, luck favours the brave. Boy or girl."

Owen took a deep breath and lifted the corner of the white blanket, swore and dropped it again as he reared back with shock.

"What!" Andy demanded, "Rhysie? What is it babe?"

Rhys reached for the other side as Owen started to hyperventilate and Tosh's face was one of confusion.

"Bloody hell Panda" Rhys whispered, "Its…awwwww…Look. They got a two for one deal. Theres two in here!"

Ianto glanced at Jack who was now gushing as he plucked at the blanket, finally revealing the two little babies laying there silently staring back at them. Naked little chicks curled together with wide almond eyes.

"Oh Tosh, look" Jack crooned, "Your eyes. Owen's mouth aaaawwwwwwwwww look, she's poking her tongue out at me."

Ianto watched as Owen gently reached in and plucked out the little girl, his face one of open adoration as her hands reached for the safety of his hug and he started to cry. Tears rolled down his cheeks as he held a perfect little baby.

Ianto scooped out the other one, handing him to his mother and Tosh held her son with glee, looking at his little fingers and toes.

"Perfect" Owen whispered, "My perfect little blossom."

"He's going to be a Hero" Tosh whispered of her own bundle and Ianto leaned back as his head scratched and crackled with the knowledge of what was happening.

"Hero" Owen looked over, "That's a great name love. Let's call him that? Hero Sato Harper. Kinda sound right."

"And our little girl?" Tosh was looking over at her, seeing Owen's Pout forming on the little face, "Awww, she's a pouty one."

"She's perfect!" Owen defended, clutching her tighter and Ianto smiled softly as he watched Daddy's little Girl twist him around her finger with ease as she cooed up at him.

Now Ianto was interested, wondering what her name actually was. They had all referred to her as Harper, her surname being the only title she answered to. He watched with interest as Owen seemed to consider his charge.

"You know…I bet she is a dainty little thing like her mama, all ponytails and makeup, yeah my princess" Owen was crooning and Ianto bit the inside of his mouth as he turned to Tosh who was canting her head.

"You don't think she might be a wee warrior?" she asked hopefully.

"Nah! Hero will be the fighter, she will be the damsel he has to protect" Owen scoffed "No. We gave him a strong name, the name of a strong man. She is a delicate little flower, she needs a name to reflect her little self. Imagine a ballerina maybe, or on a horse with little jodhpurs on and looking so prim and proper."

Ianto grunted as he settled back and let Byrd climb up for a look at the babies, leaning on to check on them.

"See darling?" Tosh crooned, "This is Hero. He is going to be your best friend!"

She stared at him and nodded, then looked over at Owen's bundle and he eagerly shuffled to the edge of his chair to show her, "See darling? You can share jewellery and clothes and boys…er…maybe not boys."

Ianto looked at the ceiling and Jack frowned at him, trying to work out why he was squirming so.

"Awww" Byrd crooned, "Look."

"Yeah" Owen sighed dramatically, "Lovely right?"

"Can I have her?" Byrd asked, and she held out her arms calmly.

"Er…." Owen looked at Jack who nodded, and then he placed the baby into the arms of her future love.

Ianto swallowed as hormonal tears threatened and watched Byrd grin down at her future wife with open delight.

"She perfek!" Byrd gushed, reaching out to stroke the dark hair, "Oh she lubly"

Owen and Tosh preened as the Lilacs shimmered with delight.

Byrd sighed as she stroked the little head again, "Nice Kitty. My Kitty Kat."


	25. strapping in

So, Ianto found himself standing in the wardrobe room looking forlornly at all those lovely Yan things with a wanting/longing that tore at him, his hands rubbing the slight bump as he considered what the hell he was going to wear to this bloody naming day.

Hero and Kitty were such sweet little buttons and he was having trouble equating them to the two mischievous imps he had met during…that time.

He scratched at his three day's growth, wondering if Jack wanted to shave him as a treat, gods he loved pampering him any way he would let him and it was getting insanely hard to find something that wasn't boring for him while Jack gushed about.

He sighed as he looked over at the Ianto side and grimaced at his tailored suits that would never fit now. He was walking towards them when he had an inspiration so he walked over to Yan's side and removed the nice blue and white paisley scarf Tosh had gifted him that he liked so much, then he headed to Jack's corner.

Ianto stood and stared at himself in the mirror, not sure what to make of himself.

The old pair of denim jeans were held up by a belt and the knitted vest over the soft shirt seemed to look OK, not too much bump visible. It was the coat Jack had never worn that seemed to finish off the ensemble with the scarf tied jauntily. Ianto looked like a cross between Ianto and Yan that somehow seemed fitting.

He was unsure if he looked silly or not so he carefully made his way to the top of the stairs, calling out to his Cariad as he had promised not to travel the stairs without him, the nightmares Jack had started to have of ways he might lose this baby included one of Ianto falling down the stairs.

Jack raced to the bottom and looked up eagerly, then froze as Ianto looked down.

"Holly fuck" Jack breathed as this fuckable god stared down. Ianto looked like he was about to take a catwalk and his blush as he watched Jack lick his lips made it worse.

"Not too…fluffy?" Ianto grimaced.

"Baby, you look super sweet and manly yet…gods, the scarf is perfect. I'm so glad you didn't shave or it wouldn't work but your little beard makes you look kinda dangerous. Like you just flew in from some other world." Jack gushed "Oh gods, you are in my pants! Ho-ho, in my pants."

"Stop it!" Ianto scolded, leaning against him as he let Jack practically carry him down to the bottom, then before Ianto could react Jack was calling his mother.

"Yes love?" Dahlia tottled into the hallway and stopped as she looked at Ianto, "Oh! Where's the baby?"

Ianto grinned and opened the flappy coat, showing the vest which he smoothed with his hands and the bump was suddenly SO real.

"Clever" she laughed, "I like that on you, you look lovely and warm. Can't have you catching a chill."

Ianto resisted the urge to eye roll as gloves were pushed at him and did a pout instead as Jack took a breath, "Now Mama, we talked about this. Ianto knows his own temperatures. If he is cold I will warm him. He will tell me so."

Dahlia caught the warning and smiled as she moved away to check what the little princess was getting into. Now that she was crawling not much seemed safe.

"Thank you Cariad" Ianto gushed with appropriate eyelash fluttering, "Can I please walk to the SUV?"

Jack considered and Ianto knew the urge to carry him was overwhelming so he added, "I need the exercise, you know I will sleep better for it and you can always give me a lovely massage later."

Jack nodded happily and 'helped' him to the vehicle and lifted him into the seat where he found the little minx had inserted herself in her seat already, the distant chirping of Dahlia quietly, yet desperately searching filtering through the open back door.

"Cariad, go tell Mama that Byrd managed to get in here" Ianto said and Jack's head popped up with horror to look at the toddler who calmly poked her tongue at him, then went back to examine the necklace she was playing with.

"Is that your heart?" Jack pointed.

"It's ok Cariad" Ianto replied as he adjusted the blanket Jack was now stuffing around him, "She knows it's your heart you gave me so she will always treasure it and keep it safe."

"Oh OK" Jack shrugged, then he turned to the house "WHAT ARE YOU DOING!"

"I can't find…you little bugger!" Dahlia puffed as she rushed out to peer at the baby.

"Like the tide Dahlia" Ianto said softly, "Never turn your back."

"Indeed" she huffed, "Not going in the front darling?"

"Safer for bumpy in the back, he can wear the body harness instead of a lap belt" Jack explained as he slipped Ianto into a harness, much to his horror, "Must protect the cargo."

Byrd inspected her Taddy's contraction that was sort of like a parachute harness attached to the seat and Ianto counted to ten silently as she pointed at him and rolled her eyes for him.

Then they were off.

Ianto just hoped Jack would calm down before they got back to the Lilacs for the 'after party' party this afternoon. At least he would be happy with home just over the lawn.

Byrd patted the purple love heart as she slipped it into her little dress's bodice.

Claimed.

After all…

We all know it was destined to be there against her heart anyway.

Right?


	26. tokens

The Naming Ceremony was nice, standing at the edge of the bay as the sun warmed them for a change, winter already relenting to the occasional nice day and Ianto had endured the folding chair Jack had carried over because Byrd had happily curled in his lap stroking his neck as she patently waited to get 'her' baby back.

Kitterick. A nice name but one he knew would not be used as Byrd's 'Kitty' which had prompted the posh name Owen had latched onto was now being used by everyone. Now he knew why she called herself Harper. Hard to be taken seriously as an assassin with a name like that.

Byrd had stopped stroking his neck and looked up at him adorningly, now reaching for his beard and stroking that instead.

"Taddy furry too" she said and he hummed softly, "My Taddy."

"Yes darling, all yours" Ianto said, then looked down at her, "Taddy is making another one who will call me Taddy too you know."

She frowned as she nodded.

"And you will be his bestest sister in the whole Verse" Ianto crooned, "You will love him and protect him and maybe sometimes want to thump him but you never will. Hero and Harp…Kitty are lucky because they get to know each other always but you are even luckier because you got to be oldest for real and evers. You will know more and you can tell him so. When he is crying or sad you can be another mummy."

She seemed to consider and then looked over at her father, "Taddy grows him this time?"

"Yes Pumpkin Bum" Ianto rubbed at her back encouragingly, "We love you so much we wanted to give you a special gift. Like Daddy had his uncle Gray who made him so happy once. He wants you to be happy too."

"Where is he?" she asked.

"Daddy's right here silly" Ianto laughed as she shook her head.

"Uncle Gray" she frowned, "Why he not here?"

"Ah" Ianto grimaced at a short and curly one and was relieved when Tosh entered the room looking for a quiet spot.

"Mine?" Byrd asked hopefully and Tosh smiled as she handed Kitty over to her number one fan.

"Would you like to give her the bottle darling?" Tosh asked as she held it up and Byrd nodded excitedly, careful to get the angle right, like Taddy had showed her.

"Look" she gushed, "A bottle for my little love."

"Do you think it sounded right?" Tosh asked Ianto nervously, "Kitterick Sato Harper"

"Harper" Byrd repeated as she looked down at the baby with wide eyes, "You hungry?"

"Kitterick, or Kitty" Tosh corrected and Byrd hummed softly to show she had heard and Ianto cleared his throat as he sought to change the subject.

"Jack is dying to please me and I am running out of ideas for something that doesn't result in my blood pressure rising" Ianto sighed.

"I thought you were chewing the inside of your cheek earlier" Tosh sighed. "As Yan he could shower you with jewels and…what?"

Ianto's eyes had lit up as he reached for her hand, "Tosh, you are a genius. He can do something to please me that might actually get him out of my hair for a while. Clever Tosh!"

She shrugged as she finally got her sleepy baby back as Byrd was too small to 'explode' her. As Tosh giggled and burped the baby, Byrd slid off the chair and wander off, probably looking for that bloody Hearthwarmer and her treats.

Well, shouldn't complain. She was thinner now she was toddling.

"There you are" Jack smiled as he entered the room and found Ianto still curled in the chair alone.

"Tired" Ianto admitted, "A wonderful day and I am so pleased for them but I am tired and my back does hurt darling Cariad."

Jack's face softened as he knelt to stroke Ianto's cheek and ask what he could do.

"Tosh reminded me of something" Ianto said as he let Jack gingerly lift him to carry him to bed, "You know all those lovely little perfume bottles you got me?"

Jack grunted as he looked at the stairs and frowned, "I need to sort you a room down here soon."

"Babe!" Ianto slapped at him, "The glass pretties!"

"Yes darling" Jack was back in croon mode as he headed to the day room instead, the bed in there was big enough for now, "I'm listening sweetling."

"You don't give me pretties anymore" Ianto said softly, "Is it because I'm in male form? You know I still love my shinnies?"

"Really?" Jack asked as he started to cover Ianto gently, "I…really?"

"I love coloured glass" Ianto said dreamily as he settled into the bed, "And besides. The baby will need stimulation and the pretty bottles did keep Byrd's eyes busy in the bath didn't they? She still likes to hold one. Doesn't have to be perfume bottles. You can get little animals in glass too. If this is a boy then a wee set of his own boyish baubles might be nice."

Jack was already thinking of things he had, places he shopped and Ianto relaxed as he saw Jack start to shine with delight.

Yes.

He was getting excited now.


	27. bad timing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://postimages.org/)

Ianto laid staring at her with a soft frown, her harried look and darting looks at the doorway unsettling.

"River, just tell me why you are here" Ianto hissed and she grimaced.

OK, not a problem…a big fucking problem.

"Jack has taken his mother across to the Lilacs for something" Ianto assured her, "Now stop fucking about and….ah shit."

The door of the Tardis opened a bit wider and big Byrd peeked out, her face one of consternation, "Hi-Ho Taddy."

"Byrdie. What the fuck are…OK. Just tell me!" Ianto demanded folding his arms, "Right now. Stand together and tell me what shit you have…"

Ianto's voice died as Yan calmly stepped out behind his daughter…ah…her daughter… their daughter ah. Fuck. You know what I mean.

"Hello me"

"Oh god, I do sound like a Radio Announcer" Ianto huffed from the bed and Yan grinned softly.

"I forgot I said that. I've got myself in a wee spot and I need myself, as in you…to take on something. It's set and has happened here, just not there." Yan said and of course Ianto understood himself, flopping back to reveal the bump as he swore at the ceiling.

Set event.

"Oh my goddess!" Byrd gasped, "You didn't tell me it was….oh wow. Is that the snot?"

"Stop calling your brother that" Yan frowned, "You know that's why he calls you goober!"

"I'll stop when he stops" Byrd pouted, looking like her Dad and Ianto smiled softly as his sweet chickadee.

"OK, what is it you have to sidestep, dump or collect" Ianto asked.

"Who" River frowned as she glared at him, "Not what. And my hubby has no idea what we are up to and is going to spit when he knows we messed…well. When I say messed maybe we just…"

"RIVER!"

"Christ on a stick" Yan snorted, "I was quite temperamental with this one, I didn't realise. Look at that vein on my forehead!"

Ianto glared at his female self and she grinned back gleefully, holding out an envelope, "Right. See this, in the back of the book it goes. Don't open until the date on the front, don't worry. I know when you do and it's OK."

"So I don't do as told, great. Sounds about right" Ianto muttered to himself as Yan snorted and turned to River.

"See?" she demanded, "Happy now. Now go get him while I explain."

As River and Byrd took off into the Tardis Yan sat on the edge of the bed and looked at the bump longingly. "What I wouldn't give just for a touch. Know I can't but…he was such a cute baby. I did tell myself that it's going to be OK. I remember saying that he is small but healthy."

"How far apart are we?" Ianto asked as she shrugged.

"Lots. In this timeline…years darling. Don't worry. Obviously you didn't fuck up because here we are, right?" Yan smiled, then sobered, "Right. This was partly Byrd's fault but don't blame her. You know she is her father's child and more prone to sticking her finger in a hole for no apparent reason that anyone else we know…bar Jack. Right?"

Ianto nodded.

"So! This had to be now because it was now. It's set. Sorry. You see, we found him. Was hard to go back that far but I am so much stronger than you are now…" Yan's eyes glaze over and she grinned softly, "So much stronger than you even think right now. So. He knows me, he is attached to me. Very, both versions…well, all versions. He understands the switchy Chameleon thing and my scent is what he knows best. Look I won't lie. This was hard and a bit of a fuckup in the beginning but I will promise you er…I did actually as I recall …it is going to be OK."

Now Ianto had a cold feeling in the pit of his stomach as he stared at his female form. She wasn't lying, he knew when he as lying but still…she was a bit nervous.

"Come on. Bring him out" Ianto sighed and Byrd yanked the arm of a boy who rushed to Yan and attached himself to her waist.

"Stop it, come on. Look. Me!" Yan crooned, pushing the boy towards the bed and he looked at Ianto was confusion, "Remember? This is younger me. See his baby bump?"

"That's Snot!" Bye said helpfully and then ducked as Yan slapped at her.

The boy moved to the edge of the bed and sniffed the air, then reached out to touch Ianto gently, his face lighting up as he placed his hand on the bump and it moved.

"Great" Ianto sighed, "Now you nutters woke the baby."

"Ah, speaking of babies" Byrd motioned her mother and Yan went back into the Tardis, their laugher booming back out as Ianto twisted in the bed nervously.

"Such a little imp at that age" Yan was talking as she walked back out with baby Byrd in her arms, "Always into everything."

"That's right" Byrd laughed at the baby version of herself, "Steampunk all the way. Don't' give in, Daddy will always let you have the gears! So will Grandpa Doctor."

"Grandpa…what? What?" Ianto blinked as he tried to ignore the baby version's laughter.

Baby Byrd had found some goggles and had shoved them on, making her look quite Steampunk with her little outfit Dahlia had been working on. As Ianto stared he saw the beginnings of the Steampunk Woman who was laughing at her younger self with glee.

"You know, first sign of madness, talking to yourself" Ianto said to Byrd who roared again, her head thrown back as her father's laugh sounded from her throat.

"Here, take her" River shoved the baby at the boy who looked at her like she was about to eat him.

"Gray, come on this is your niece here" River laughed, "This is Baby Byrd. See? Proof, she was a child once."

"Gray" Ianto repeated the name with shock and the boy swung to look at him again.

Yeah.

There it is.

Those Harkness eyes stared as Gray wrung his hands. Ianto could barely breathe as the boy leaned over to place little Byrd on the bed and then he seemed to want something.

"We cuddle" Yan said softly, "He likes cuddling Ianto as much as Yan. He wants permission to hop on."

"Ah…sure" Ianto shrugged, "Why not. What a weird day."

Gray clambered onto the bed and placed his head by the bump to croon softly as little Byrd looked at him and she reached out to touch his face, his smile unmistakable as she mirrored it.

"Oh yeah, he doesn't talk" Yan yelled over her shoulder, "You have to work on his trust. He will talk when he is ready. Be careful though, you know Jack's temper."

Ianto slid the envelope into the back of his diary and looked at the young boy as the Tardis ground away.

"Hello Gray" he said after a while and Gray shot up the bed to hug him, his head now on his chest as he rubbed his face in Ianto's chest hair. Yep.

That's a familiar Harkness trait too.

Ianto sighed as he looked at his Steampunk Child, "You know what Byrdie girl? This is what is known as a clusterfuck."


	28. blessings

Ianto was finally starting to relax as the little boy did too, his hands had stopped stroking and were now firmly around the waist of the baby girl who was asleep in between them.

Ianto watched his face as he examined Byrd, his interest apparent as was his confusion.

"It was explained that this is a long time ago, right?" Ianto said softly, "I don't know you yet. We get to find each other all over again. Isn't that cool? We become friends again, same with Byrdie. She will grow up loving you and when she is big, she will do this. She will remember how much she loves you and will save you along with Yan…the other me. Then you come here for me to love. I always wanted a baby brother. I was the baby, sucks right?"

Gray smiled softly as he nodded, his eyes still searching.

"What is it Sweetling?" Ianto whispered, "What are you looking for?"

Then he noticed that the little boy was smelling the air and he knew. "Jack? You can smell your brother, right?"

Gray nodded and Ianto smiled, "Aren't you in for a surprise."

The noise in the doorway was a soft huff as Jack entered, carrying Lucifer and dumping him on the bed, "Look. Little bugger was in the begonias again, why does he…."

Gray shot to the end of the bed and snarled as the blade from his boot swung at Jack who squeaked as he yanked the cat back off the bed and stared at the wild animal defending Ianto.

"Gray!" Ianto cried with surprise, "Sweetling come here …come to Yan. It's OK, come here."

Gray snarled again as he slowly crawled backwards, one hand still prepared with the blade.

"Gray" Jack breathed with wonder, falling to his knees and releasing the spitting cat who ran off angrily, "No. Oh by the Goddess? Grayson? It's me. Jax."

Gray considered and then a high pitched scream rent the air and Ianto grabbed Byrd as she started to cry.

Dahlia was clutching the doorframe as she stared at her little boy, her face twisted with grief and confusion as the child swung the knife in her direction still snarling, then his lips slowly covered his teeth as he stared at her, his head tilting.

"Grayson" she whispered as she stumbled to the bed and fell beside it, clutching at the covers near his hand, "Sweetling? My little starfish?"

Gray leaned over and sniffed the unfamiliar lavender as Ianto swore softly. He knew the Boeshane smell was gone, "Cariad, come let him smell you by your mother. He can't smell Boeshane."

Jack grinned as he sat and leaned over, exposing his throat and Gray grunted, then sniffed nervously, then moved closer. Then he reached out to touch a small scar by Jack's ear.

"Remember that?" Jack smiled at him, "Da was so furious when he saw that. We told him the mule bit me remember? He would have tanned your hide if he'd known you had thrown a rock at me. But you didn't mean it. I know you didn't mean it Gray."

Gray looked at his mother again, then leaned over to look into her face and she smiled through her tears, "I know I smell different. A plant here called Lavender. It smells lovely, doesn't it? Oh my love, my little starfish, how you've grown. Look at you, such a big boy. You must be at least six. Seven?"

Gray considered and then held up six fingers before shooting back up the bed and snuggling into Ianto's armpit to glare at them defiantly.

"It's OK Cariad" Ianto crooned, pulling him in, "I needed a cuddle right about now."

Gray closed his eyes and sighed as Ianto rolled to spoon, the baby bump in the way and Gray rolled over to spoon the bump, his little hands rubbing it as he started that crooning sound again.

"How?" Jack sobbed as he helped his mother onto the bed and she cuddled against her son. Byrd grinned as she held her little arms up and Jack lifted her, kissing her before he sat on the bed.

"I would say ask her" Ianto said nodding at their daughter, "But you will have to wait some time. That bugger of a woman! The three of us are like the Witches of Eastwick!"

"So River was here too?" Jack asked.

"Excuse me!" Ianto huffed, "I say three witches so you assume it's Yan, Big Byrd and River?"

Jack shrugged, "Well its right, isn't it?"

Ianto started to laugh softly, "Well of course it is Cariad. Come here, I think I at least need a bloody kiss for all this worry."

Jack lay down and placed their daughter against Ianto's back, cuddling in to spoon them both as Byrd nuzzled her Taddy's neck.

"I love you" Jack whispered, "Goddess I love this life."

Ianto had no reply except to lean back and accept a kiss.

After all he did too.

And he thanked that same Goddess every day.


	29. meow

The bath was a new concept but thankfully Ianto had already learnt with Dahlia and calmly tipped Byrd's orange scented bubble bath in, then stood back and watched his eyes widen at the expanding water.

"Bubbles" Ianto said softly, "Come on. Follow me."

He let the robe fall around his feet and he stepped into the bath, sliding into the hot water with a soft moan of delight and Gray struggled for his clothes to join him, squeaking at the heat.

"Come on, I usually have it hotter" Ianto laughed, "But it is bad for the baby to have the water too hot you know."

Gray canted his head as he listened and Ianto found it nice to have someone that listened. Well, other than Lucifer and most of the time he flat out ignored him.

"You get many different scents" Ianto said as he pointed to the bubbles, "Your brother can go shopping and get you a selection, then we can try them all out and you can see which you like the best. Your mother loves Lavender, as you smelt. Jack …well, he's my favourite smell but don't tell."

Jack felt a rare blush as he stood outside the door listening and he grinned impishly into the mirror as he winked at himself.

"Aunty Tosh is all about orchids and Uncle Owen is a twat." Ianto said, then giggled "Oops, I mean, he smells all medical because he is a doctor and they all small like that."

Gray frowned and Ianto saw the mistake, "As in a medical doctor. Not the mad man in a box kind."

Gray grinned as he agreed, that man was quite mad.

"Byrd likes this one at the moment, but she likes strawberry too" Ianto yawned showing his teeth, "But it is too sweet for my stomach at the moment, makes me feel icky."

Gray reached for a bar of soap and it popped out of his hand making his eyes widen again. Ianto laughed as he watched the child start to play, grabbing the soap only to lose it again.

"Slipperier than a fish" Ianto chortled and Gray grinned.

Once they were done Ianto rose and got a robe, then motioned for Gray to get out, wrapping a large towel around him and drying him vigorously. Obviously Gray did know that part and he put his arms up, then laughed as the towel tickled.

Ianto laughed as well, kissing a red cheek before rising to walk through to the bedroom where Jack was waiting.

"We all good?" Jack asked and Gray looked at the clothes laid out with interest.

"I grabbed some stuff quick, we will need to do a wee shop up but these will do for now, right?" Jack seemed desperate for praise and Ianto smiled as he leaned in for a kiss then he whispered that he was such a wonderful man.

Jack relaxed and helped Gray dress as Ianto dressed as well.

"What are you doing?" Jack asked as he watched.

"Come on, I'm going nuts and Owen said I can be up for a few hours each day now!" Ianto pouted, knowing Jack couldn't say no.

"well…you have to sit in the chair and behave!" Jack scolded, "We can watch TV or play a game of chess or something, no exertions."

"Aw, Cariad" Ianto huffed and Gray huffed too, his exaggerated stomping down the stairs making Ianto and Jack giggle.

"He always was a clown" Jack said softly, "When he…after he was gone the life seemed to leach from the entire world."

"Well, we are in for a bumpy ride" Ianto said as they reached to bottom and Jack loosened his grip on his sweetlings, "Poor kid. We have to be patient it will…"

A screech had them hurrying to the main room and they relaxed as they found Gray crouching to examine a huge fat cat that sat calmly staring back. A big black and white moggy that licked it's whiskers as it regarded him, then it rose and wobbled over to touch noses.

"Dumbledore!" Dahlia explained happily, "A kiss? Do you like Gray?"

The cat squeaked. A tiny sound for such a large cat and then wandered off with its tail held high as Gray followed, also on all fours. His own squeaking sounding a little off too.

"As long as he doesn't want to…oh gods, Cariad the cat biscuits!" Ianto gasped and Jack ran to grab them before Gray decided to sample them, his laughter as he called back that the water bowl was already a hit bouncing off the walls. The sound startled Gray who flew back into the room with wide eyes and he burrowed into the cushions of the chair as Ianto crooned and pretended to dig for him until he popped his head up sheepishly to see that he was not being threatened.

As Ianto settled Gray curled around him and hummed softly, then gasped as Dumbledore leaped gracefully to the arm of the chair to regard them. For a fat cat, he moved like liquid.

Byrd stood by the chair as she watched her Taddy cuddle Gray to his chest and she grinned happily.

Things were happier, she felt it.

Uncle Gray made them happy.

She was happy too.


	30. Shaking the nightmare

It was dark and there were lights flashing now and then. Pinholes of light twinkling, flickering on and off.

It was cold and he didn't know where his clothes were, it felt like he had been naked forever. His wrist was on fire and he was cradling it to his chest as he tried not to cry. One of the others had cried and they had descended on him like flies on shit.

The hold was large and there were about twenty kids of various ages crammed into little pockets of space between crates and boxes.

He had worked out that you can't hide from them. They smelt you or somehow saw you even if you were well hidden. Hiding only seems to encourage them to hunt for you like a game.

He sat in a corner in plain sight, a piece of cardboard between him and the floor which was almost as filthy as him anyway. His knees pulled to his chest to hide his bits, they liked to touch those too. If you kept them covered they didn't seem to care, but if they were displayed they wanted to look. It was like they forgot they were there unless you showed them. Like…maybe they didn't know if you were a boy of girl unless they saw the bits and if they didn't see them they didn't know you had them. They didn't seem to remember each time so humans must all look the same to them or something.

Weird when they seemed to see so well in the dark.

It stank.

There was the sound of sobbing, whimpering and things clanking and shifting as the vessel moved through some sort of course. Every now and then there was a scrapping sound against the hull and he wondered if it was an asteroid field. Da had talked about space and stuff like that.

Da.

Where was Da?

Was he looking for him?

One of the older kids was beating one of the little ones. He had shit himself and was being punished for it, the older child's fists making dull thudding noises against the toddler's skin. As the small child started to wail the doors opened and Gray took a deep breath as he looked down at the spot of something nasty on the cardboard, ignoring the weird sound of the creatures as they moved over the grating.

The little one was making too much noise and his cries was like catnip, one reaching out to touch his arm and the child screamed as it burned him with something in it's tentacle hand.

The stench of burning flesh filled the hold and Gray continued to stare at the spot on the cardboard, willing his stomach to remain calm. The slops they had been given earlier were all there was until the next lot in hours and hours. They were all starving and the little one was not going to last long anyway. Far too small to fight for his food and not cute enough for a big one to protect.

The babies always died soon after being caught.

Gray felt something touch his foot, a feather touch and he looked through his lashes as a tentacle slid up to inspect his toes.

Don't scream.

Don't give them what they want.

Don't give them your voice.

.

.

.

.

Ianto was shaking him, calling his name as the boy thrashed in the bedding, his mouth open in a silent scream and Ianto was on his knees now, the child violently shaken as Ianto roared.

Jack sprang from the bed and turned to see Gray's eyes fly open as he took a deep breath and Ianto stroked his face with whispered affections.

Then Gray was clutching at him, frantic for his affection as Ianto wrapped himself around the frail body and rocked him, rubbed his back and tried to comfort him.

Jack found it unnerving that his brother never made a sound, bar the ragged breathing as he clung to Ianto for grim life.

"Poor little Gray boy" Ianto was crooning "You're safe now munchkin. It's OK, you are safe my wee star."

Gray's hands were scrabbling for purchase, gathering handfuls of Ianto's PJ top as he tried to get a tighter grip on his only lifeline, the nightmare still dwelling in the corner of his mind.

Ianto started to sing.

A gentle welsh lullaby that had Gray instantly relaxing with relief showing it was one that he had been sung on the Tardis by his Ianto/Yan already.

Ianto was grateful for his other self choosing this lullaby then snorted. Of course she chose this one. It was Mama's.

Byrd had slept through everything and now as everyone settled she finally woke, sitting up blearily to look over her father at the other two mushed together. She slithered over Jack's chest as he laughed softly to plop into the middle, cuddling against Gray as Ianto spooned him.

Jack's last conscious thought before sleep came again was that this was becoming a regular thing.

The nightmares.

The Byrdie in the middle.

Ianto staring into the dark for the rest of the night worrying.

It might have been easier if Gray had gone to Dahlia's but his frantic silent begging had broken Ianto who had given in.

Jack wondered how long it might be before Gray could let Ianto out of his sight.


	31. understanding a misunderstanding?

Ianto felt comfortable in the big clothes from Jack's side of the wardrobe again, slopping to the car as he steeled himself for an interesting afternoon as Gray and Dahlia sat in the back talking with Byrd.

Ianto settled into the seat and silently endured the harness being adjusted, Jack's loving expression making up for it, as did the loving kiss before the rug was tucked on his lap.

Jack drove sedately, almost granny style to the mall and then rushed to get a wheelchair, much to Ianto's annoyance. But….he did agree.

Soon Dahlia was speaking to Gray softly in Boeshanian as she pointed things out and it occurred to Ianto that she didn't realise he could understand her as she explained to Gray about pregnancies in this world.

"So he will get fat, like our men do but he will be sicker. As you can see Jack is a good provider, and good carer and protector. Ianto does try but he is not like our kind" she told Gray and Ianto's hand froze as he was reaching for a pair of socks, "We must try and be supportive and not judge too harshly. It seems to be his way to be all flighty and weak sometimes."

Jack returned from the t-shirt isle and dumped some things into the trolley, then saw Ianto's face and frowned. "What's going on?"

"Nothing, jut deciding on a nice dress shirt darling" Dahlia purred and Ianto let his hand settle in his lap as he watched. "Hungry? Maybe we should feed the babies."

"Yeah" Jack looked at the munchkin on his chest and she grinned back to show that she agreed.

"Cariad, there is room on my lap for her" Ianto said for the third time, "She is too big for that front pack."

"Nonsense" Jack snorted as he moved them to the checkout, "She's fine!"

Ianto let himself be wheeled to the food court where Jack went to get something and then he looked silently at the plate that was delivered, wishing he had been allowed to choose. He really felt like a piece of banana cake. Oh well.

Gray was enamoured with everything, babbling and pointing with wonder as he sampled everyone's food then showed a liking for Ianto's crisps. Ianto pushed the plate at him, not wanting the salty vinegar treats.

Dahlia noticed and leaned closer to Gray, "He does that too. Doesn't eat. He seems to sulk a lot."

Ianto took a sip of his water and tried to ignore her but Jack was frozen in place as he stared at his mother.

"Mama?" he said calmly, "Why are you being to uncaring? Might it not be the baby that doesn't want the food?"

"Oh come on darling" she snorted, "He is such hard work. A nice Boeshanian boy would have been such a good provider and nurturer. His moods are getting worse. He is not as good at cooking them as you are, clearly."

Ianto placed the glass down and looked out over the food court as he let the little girl in his lap shift to look at her grandmother.

The gasp of shock had him looking back and he was surprised to see Dahlia mopping at her lap as Byrd calmly sat the empty water glass back on the table, her glare a parody of her father's matching one.

"Hearthwarmer, if you are jealous of Ianto or find him unsatisfactory as a son then that is something you need to work through" Jack snarled, "But if you think I will sit here while you openly insult him to the extent that our daughter feels the need to defend him then perhaps we need to reassess a few things."

"It's OK Cariad" Ianto said wearily, "She's been going all day. Gray is ignoring her for the better part. I didn't realise that Byrd could understand her too."

Dahlia looked up from the soggy napkins and stared at Ianto as she finally understood that Ianto understood Boeshanian and had been able to hear every scathing comment.

"Why did you not say you understood me!" She went on the offensive and Ianto chose to look down at his daughter and cluck, jiggling her on his knee as she continued to stare a hole in her grandmother.

"Rude" Byrd finally said, "You rude!"

"Hush now love" Ianto crooned, "It's OK. I have you and I will never worry about being good enough. I know I am a good Taddy because you are strong, brave and beautiful."

"Yeah" Byrd pouted and Ianto kissed her lovingly.

Then she turned to Gray and pouted again.

The hesitant kiss with a delight to them both.


	32. Choosing

Ianto was sitting in the sun watching Byrd and Gray play, the lawn had been mowed and they were playing with the clippings.

Dahlia slid over to sit beside him, her discomfort evident. Ianto waited, feeling that she should be the one to make the first move, not him. After a long and painful silence she finally spoke.

"You are not what I would have chosen."

"Wow" Ianto said softly, "Way to apologise there."

"No, I don't mean it like that…I…." she huffed, "In our time, on Boeshane it is not as simple as love and choice. Franklin is not the one I wanted you know."

Ianto was interested now and made a mall noise of encouragement as he watched Gray stroke Byrd's hair away from her face lovingly.

"There were sixteen original settler families that struck out for the peninsular" she explained, "Farmers who really thought they could irk out a life. So, bloodlines became very important. Making sure the blood remained diluted and no inbreeding occurred. Of course over the years it became harder, everyone was related in some fashion, so began the choosing."

"The committee of elders considered the ledger, looking at the bloodlines of all those eligible and then gave choices" she explained as she saw Ianto show interest, "As women were scarce and male breeding was capable there were three males and two females offered to the one that wanted a bonding."

"How did they decide who got to choose?" Ianto asked.

"Status" she replied, "Franklin's father wanted him to bond and so they offered me as one of the female choices."

She leaned back, "I was enamoured with another and it broke my heart when I learnt he was given choices that did not include me. Seems we were connected through the lines too strongly. Franklin was interested in a man called Seul. I thought he would choose him, he even courted him but then he turned to me. I was both flattered an heartbroken."

"You did not love him?"

"I grew to, after a fashion" she smiled, "It was different. We were expected to provide, cherish and protect. It was a harsh life but one we were born to and knew no other. This place, this life is…a dream."

"So…I would not have been a choice for Jack" Ianto said softly as her first words came back to him.

"No" she said with genuine discomfort, "You are so….less that a match. Whereas Yan is perfect. I would have fought for her to be included in the choosing and then influenced him as much as possible to choose her."

Ianto snorted at the absurdity of it. "Dahlia, you do realise that I am Yan, just in different clothing?"

"I do" she stammered, "But my brain does not always remember this. A male partner had a different requirement or skillset? As a woman, you are perfect. A a man, you irritate me as you seem a poor choice."

"I don't know if you compliment or insult" Ianto said and then he laughed softly.

"I see you with Gray and I see Yan. I didn't with Byrd, maybe because you were not attempting to push it. She saw you, she recognised you but with Gray you are making an effort to remind him you are a dual person" Dahlia looked over as Byrd squealed, "I am irritated because...I think it is because you show yourself to be a good match after all. I do not like failure, I do not like apology and I certainly do not like the realisation that I may have misjudged."

"You seem dual sometimes too" Inot sighed, "You are the Mama I wished I could have kept by my side and you are the thorn in that side as well. I am beginning to realise that you do not know you are doing it."

"It is the role of the Hearthwarmer not only to care for your young, but to challenge you" she explained, "It is dangerous out there. You must be vigilant; you must fight for your family. I think subconsciously I am channelling my own Hearthwarmer, Franklin's mother. She didn't like me either. Too thin and too blonde. She said my children were disappointments as well. Even as she fiercely took them from me when she could. Am I really like that? Snarling an spitting even as I try to nurture?"

"A bit" Ianto saw her with new eyes, "Dahlia. Are you jealous?"

She looked at her hands and Ianto sighed as he chose his words, "True love. Such a difficult thing to see when you were not afforded it yourself. I am sorry. You know…my mother loved me dearly yet she still left me. You love me yet you keep attacking me. Do you not see that you hurt me? You make me feel small and abandoned again? I question my worth?"

Her head shot up as she looked at him and her eyes filled with tears as she recalled the little boy hugging the teddy bear in the laundry.

How could she have forgotten.

He needs a Mama, not a Hearthwarmer.

He accepted her arms and she pulled his head to her breast as her other and slid down to his little pot belly.

How could she be so cruel. She had to remember her own fears and hurts as her mother-in-law scolded her, belittled and scoffed. She had to remember this little one was not of their time, or their mettle.

She had to do better.

She had to be his Mama too.


	33. She said what?

Dahlia retreated to her cabin, now needing to rethink her actions and herself.

When Gray went searching for her it was a pleasant surprise to find the children in her living room by the fire playing with the kitties and she sank into a chair as her hurts thrummed.

Ianto had not been what she expected at all. Her son had been given the choice of anyone he wanted here and there were so many choices. How did they do it? How do they choose just one?

The Jeremy Kyle Show was a good indicator that the lack of a committee of Elders to perform the Choosing was something this place definitely could benefit from.

The way her son looked at Yan, as if he expected her to shatter into gold dust and blow away, yet Ianto was seen as something solid and firm. Somehow Jaxton had managed to see the duality and accept it as one. He held Ianto's hand and kissed the knuckles delicately at the dinner table, just as he had with Yan in the same chair and when he smiled it was the same soft smile of ownership.

She had to find a way to accept this duality.

This was her problem, not theirs and as Hearthwarmer she had a responsibility not only to the babies but to her children to get this sorted. Her misguided attitude was not only affecting Ianto, it was affecting Byrd. And if Byrd could see it, so could Gray who was watching everything with those wide eyes.

She reached out to touch his hair and he drew back, something he didn't do with Ianto and she withdrew her hand, smiling to hide the pain of his rejection.

Was this another reason for her recent anger?

Ianto was right, she was jealous.

She scolded herself and decided to do better, seeing the excitement around her as Christmas approached. With this in mind she opened the books she had got from the library, choosing a pattern and settling with her knitting to create some gifts.

She would provide.

Ianto sat at the kitchen table watching Jack as he poured the hot water into the teapot, "What do you mean, provide?"

"As Hearthwarmer it is her responsibility to provide something for any celebration" Jack said as he pulled out a chair and sat to face his beloved Babycarrier, "On Boeshane things are sparse so she must provide something to ensure the good year to come. It was usually clothing or something plus food"

"So…gift giving became more ritualistic?"

"Yes my love" Jack smiled as he stroked Ianto's knuckles with his thumb, "Christmas was a sacred time, the only time gifts were exchanged. Remember I said we didn't' celebrate birthdays? Only once a year, the Yuletide was celebrated and clothing or favourite food was provided. A feast and sharing of wealth."

"We had a talk" Ianto supplied as Jack lifted the tea pot to pour, "I think she is trying to accept me."

"What do you mean, accept you" Jack snorted.

"She loves Yan, finds her a good match but not me. Not Ianto" Ianto explained, "I am not what she would have chosen for you."

The tea pot slammed down "Did she say that!"

"Easy, I am the hormonal one here" Ianto soothed, "I think I understand. She has to change her perceptions of a mate for you. My duality is still an issue for her. I don't think she knows how she hurts or insults me at times. I have decided to tell her. Each time she insults, belittles or makes me feel inadequate I will speak up and tell her. I think it is simply a matter of learning. Like Byrd learning to speak in complete sentences. Our mother has to learn how to interact with me."

"Shit" Jack sighed, "I thought we were past this."

"No, it has just flown under your radar Cariad" Ianto smiled, "It's OK. Gray just upped the ante a bit. Her jealousy knew no bounds when a second son chose me over her hearth."

"Ah!" Jack leaned back, "Where are they by the way?"

"At hers" Ianto smiled, "I hope she sees that too. She stops upsetting me, they stop avoiding her."

"Byrd is so smart" Jack smiled, "So advanced. She knows how to punish and reward."

"And she is teaching Gray" Ianto agreed with him, "We cannot have him turn from his own mother, it would be the end of her. Please do not go off on a Captain Rant. She is trying. I will give her another chance, yeah?"

"OK Sweetling" Jack chose a piece of banana cake and watched Ianto's face light up as it was placed on his plate.

Jack was noticing his mistakes as well.

Also, he hadn't overlooked the fact Ianto had just said 'our' mother not 'your' mother and knew Ianto was going to forgive her for her mistakes.

He hoped in time she would see.

His choice had been correct.


	34. an outing

"More wool?" Ianto asked with surprise as Dahlia wiggled in the chair.

"Do you think he will let us?" she asked and Ianto sighed as he got out his coms and keyed in Jack's secure line.

"Hey good looking"

"Cariad" Ianto smiled despite himself, "Mama would like to go shopping if you have time. Wool?"

"Oh, really?" although Ianto couldn't see him, he could imagine the grimace and he smiled some more as he placed a hand lovingly over the earpiece.

"Please Cariad?" he whispered warmly, "I need new PJs too."

"Oooooo!" Jack was excited now as he was promised a shopping trip for Ianto's clothing and Ianto rolled his eyes as he now knew a happy dance was happening, Owen's faint hooting a good indicator that it was pretty bad.

"Tell you what" Ianto had inspiration. "We can go to the mall, I will sit in one of their motorised scooters and Byrd and Gray will love riding on it like hooligans, hanging off the back like wee monkeys and we can have lunch at the food court. Mama can get her wool, we can get me some fuller sized clothing and Gray can get some toys. Imagine his first time in a real toy store?"

The line was silent and Ianto knew Jack had stalled out at the offer to spoil the boy.

"Be there in half an hour" came the bark as Jack cut the feed and Ianto knew he was now barking orders like the world was ending as he tried to get the Great Coat on.

Twypsn.

Ianto was telling the truth, he did need more clothes, even Jack's were getting snug now the baban was getting so big. He also had a list of things for Gray and as they waited he handed it to Dahlia, "Gray needs these, add whatever else you think. Byrd has one too, here keep them together."

She looked at the lists and saw that Gray's was being handed to her along with Byrd's and she smiled, pleased that her position as Hearthwarmer and Mother was being recognised.

"Remember to keep hold of the little bugger's leash" Ianto continued as he watched her slide the big brown slippers onto his swollen feet, "Now she is walking she can get into mischief as fast as her Daddy."

Dahlia laughed softly as she agreed, she was as naughty as Jack had been at the age and she looked up to tell him so but found herself kissing his cheek instead as his face shone with excitement.

Poor boy has been trapped too long and is relishing the chance of fresh air.

Dahlia was enamoured with the large motorised scooter and how easily the little one sat on his lap as Gray stood on the back with a gleeful expression that made him look…well. Like her baby again.

"Can we not get one of those?" she whispered to Jack who made a noise of surprise and turned to face her with a reaised eyebrow.

"Well?" she pointed as another person scooted past in their private Mobility Scooter complete with basket attachment on the front and shopping bins on the back, "Look, that one over there is sleeker. We are setting up the downstairs rooms for him, all one level with the wide doors. Darling you've not seen his poor feet. They are almost splitting with fluid and your Owen has to come do something to ease his discomfort."

"Shit" Jack said softly as he watched Ianto gingerly stand from the scooter to reach something for Gray on a high shelf and he hurried over, "I'll get that love. How about you find me a basket?"

Ianto smiled and pouted for a kiss, then drove over to a stack of baskets and had to pull three out before getting the one Byrd kept pointing at. Satisfied, she clasped it in her little arms and waddled over to present it to her father who crowed like she had the crown jewels.

"She is getting more confident every day" Jack crowed, "Look at her go!"

Byrd was now pursuing Gray who has seen something and was now standing looking at the display of planets with open interest.

"An astronomer?" Ianto said softly, "Gray? Do you want to learn about our Verse?"

He nodded and reached out to touch the picture of the earth.

"That's us." Ianto informed him, "The blue planet is us. Earth or Sol3 is its galactic designation. We just call it Earth."

He turned to look at Ianto with interest and Ianto pulled out a picture book, "Look. Here are more planets all around us."

Gray sat on the running board of the scooter and flicked through the pages with awe, his face one of excitement and Ianto motioned for Jack to get several books and then he pointed at the telescope. Jack shook his head and chose the large serious beast, knowing Tosh would have a kittens setting it up.

"Hungry Sweetling?" Ianto crooned and Gray nodded with excitement as he went to slip the book back onto the shelf, "No, you can have that one too."

Now he was so excited he had to run to Dahlia and pull at her, showing her the book and she made excited noises for him, then he ran back to carefully add it to the basket Jack was carrying. Toys and such filled the basket, a hand puppet or two and the book shop was done.

Dahlia added her basket to Jack's and watched the knitting and crocheting books as they went through and then watched with interest as Ianto added two more to her pile. One called 'recycling clothes' and another called 'hand crafts made easy' that she was watching the girl slide across the glass with curiosity.

The food court was packed but they found a seat and as they settled to eat Gray reached out for his mother handing her his juice box and she lovingly inserted the straw, her delight at being the one asked clear.

Ianto took a sip of a sinful mocha and moaned as Jack placed a serviette by his plate.

"Ianto?"

Ianto froze as the all too familiar voice broke the sense of calm and turned to look up at the interloper.

Rhiannon's gaze bored right through him.


	35. smoke and bullshit...er...i mean mirrors

"Hello Rhia" Ianto said softly as he looked for Jack, only to find he was wrestling Gray for another juice box.

Byrd stood by the scooter looking up at the lady and she patted her Taddy for an up and Ianto lifted her absently onto his knee as he tried to work out what to say to his suddenly THERE sister.

"Oh my god, she looks like Mama" Rhiannon said softly as the little eyes bored into her with open interest.

"This is my daughter, Byrd" Ianto said softly, "Byrdie, this is Aunty Rhi-rhi."

Byrd blinked as she looked at the lady and frowned, "Rhi-rhi."

Jack had looked over and seen the danger, dropping the little boy and racing towards his family without realising how Gray would see it. The little boy saw his brother's fear and looked over to see a stranger leaning over his beloved Yan-Toe and he growled as he crouched and started to flank her. They could take her easily.

"Please do not touch her" Ianto said calmly, "She is mine and I am a little bit protective of my little Byrd."

Rhiannon sat with a heavy thump as the toddler smiled, her dead mother's smile transforming the little face and Rhiannon now saw her mother's eyes regarding her from the tiny face as well even if the shape of them was slightly different.

"My god" she whispered, "she is….I mean. So cute."

"Ta" Byrd said and Ianto snorted as Byrd preened.

"Ianto?" Jack came to stand by the scooter, his obvious displeasure thrumming as he glared at Rhiannon, "Come on pumpkin, Daddy is gonna take you to see what Hearthwarmer is doing."

He scooped up his daughter and went to move away only to see his brother approaching Rhiannon from behind her, a small plastic knife from one of the tables clutched as he focused on her.

"Gray, come here little brother" he said and Gray slid around the woman, sure to eyeball her before checking Ianto who smiled and patted his cheek lovingly before telling him to go with his big brother for a minute.

Rhiannon looked at the little boy with surprise, his sneer at her unnerving as he walked to Jack and turned back for one final glare.

"Sorry about that" Ianto said softly, "Gray was abused and is coming to terms with having a loving family. He thinks he has to protect me."

"Why are you in this?" she demanded as she looked at the scooter, also taking in the frumpy clothing.

"Workplace accident" Ianto relied easily, "Back injury. I'll be off me feet for a while."

"Johnny would sympathise" Rhiannon nodded as she understood that, "He's on compo again."

Ianto tried not to grimace, "And the kids? Did they get the birthday pressies?"

"Yes" she brightened, "You actually purchased things instead of money…well, as well as. Finding the fifty pound notes in their cards as well as a gift was too much. You spoiled them. I understand sending them together too, David having to wait a whole month after she got hers would have killed him."

"They are mine to spoil too. Christmas is coming, I'll be sure to remember them" Ianto said with a fake pout, then smiled, "Children are precious. I know that and I also know how changeable their wants are at that age. With their own money they can get the latest crap and feel like one of the in-crowd."

"Well, they are always going on about the other kids and their latest things" she agreed, "It feels…you know. To not be able to give them the same as their friends."

"Mama had the same problem with us I guess" Ianto sighed, "I barely remember now."

"So…she's yours?" she looked over at the little girl who was now playing peek-a-boo with Gray around a pillar.

"Yes. Mine and Jack's" Ianto nodded, "Both our DNA."

"How?" she asked, "Both?"

"His twin sister provided the egg" Ianto said as sudden inspiration hit, "We were blessed."

"And now the boy?" she looked at Gray with raised eyebrows, "He's a new development?"

"A couple of weeks" Ianto replied, "He's from Jack's side of the family, he has the same eyes. So expressive."

"You sound smitten" she huffed.

"I am" Ianto shrugged, "I love him. Gray is mine now!"

Gray stopped moving around the pillar and swung to look at Ianto with surprise as he picked up the words being spoken, his delight filling his face as he heard that Ianto loved him.

Rhiannon looked at Ianto's feet and the big soft slippers, then smiled, "Mama had big slippers she slopped about in, remember? Pink rabbits?"

"Oh my god, yeah!" Ianto laughed, his face glowing, "She called them flopsy and dopsy."

"Your ankles are swollen" she frowned, "Just your back you said?"

"Well, it was quite a whack" Jack said as he came back to sit and smile disarmingly at her, "His kidneys are a little bruised and grumpy. A few days or so and he'll be fine. I'm overreacting with the scooter but I hate to think of him in pain."

Rhiannon nodded and Ianto asked, "Where's Byrd?"

"Mama has her" Jack swung to point and they clearly saw Dahlia and Gray looking at postcards.

"Cariad?"

"Ah shit" Jack groaned as he realised Dahlia had let go of the leash and their darling little hellion was free.


	36. Byrds hitting windows

"Errr" Jack called softly, "Mama? Where's the Byrd?"

Dahlia smiled and turned to point, then looked at her empty hand with horror. Ianto was already moving the mobility scooter back and now Rhiannon's eyes drifted to the stomach again before looking back up at Jack who was turning in small circles while stating to panic.

"Cariad, go find someone with a walkie-talkie as they can call security and use the PA system" Ianto said calmly as he started to scan under tables, "She might not realise she is free yet."

"Right" Jack shook himself, "Right love."

"Byrd?" Dahlia called softly, "Hearthwarmer needs a hug."

Ianto moved away from them knowing the little bugger had time to get some space between them and as he reached the rubbish bins the realisation set in that the wee shit had felt the leash fall and had gone for it, probably in top gear like a zombie going for brains.

Jack returned with two security officers who looked more than a little terrified of the man with that special badge. Ianto rolled his eyes and kept going in the direction of the glass doors, knowing their child would head for the largest expanse which was the main foyer, followed by outside.

There was a small huddle of people near a large glass window looking out over the children's play area and he groaned as he picked up speed, calling out for people to move and he was now able to see a familiar shoe.

"Byrdie!" he shouted and she roared as she struggled in the arms of a large breasted woman who was trying to hold a tissue to her bleeding nose for her.

"Give me my child" Ianto demanded, reaching out to hook the harness at the front and yank her into his lap but the woman hung on creating a tug of war that left Ianto dumbfounded as he stared at her, "Excuse me, this is my daughter let her go!"

"TADDA!" Byrd had gained enough breath to scream as she clutched at his arms and still the woman yanked back as she demanded security.

"Who the fuck do you think you are" Ianto snarled, giving one huge heave and the woman let go, squealing in indignation as Ianto clutched his child. He examined her and found a bump on her head and the bleeding did not show a broken nose thank the gods.

The woman was now on her feet and Ianto assumed it was her skinny and henpecked husband she was shrieking at as she demanded Child Protective Services be contacted about this poor uncared for waif.

Byrd had stopped her tantrum and looked up at her Taddy wide huge eyes, knowing she was in deep trouble and he sighed softly as he regarded her, "Now, how many times have I told you not to run away?"

Byrd opened her arms wide.

"How many times have you run away?"

Another wide arm response.

"Was it worth it?"

A morose sniffle as she shook her head and then the lip wobble as boots pounded in their direction. Deep, deep doo-doo.

"BYRD!" Jack snatched her up and promptly slapped her bum, making her squeak as she felt it through her little training pants, "You scared the living shit out of me!"

Jack then clutched her to him, kissing her face as he cuddled and crooned, telling her she was a naughty girl who didn't deserve any chicken nuggets and was very lucky he was going to get her some anyway for scaring him like that. Byrd sank into the soft touch's chest and looked triumphantly as her Taddy who glowered up at her from the chair.

"What sort of parent does that to a child!" the woman was still going and Ianto sighed as he turned to regard her. "Look at her, just a wee dot and they have her tied like a bloody dog!"

"I wanna doggie!" Byrd told her happily as she wriggled, "Daddy? Doggie?"

"Well, if your father here is too sick to even control you I don't think a dog would help" the woman scoffed as she waved a hand in Ianto's direction, "Seems he should have stuck to a dog in the first place."

"OI!" Rhiannon roared as she descended, her arm swinging and Ianto watched with complete horror as his sister struck the woman in the shoulder, "You leave my baby brother alone bitch! He's sick, clearly there are two parents here, her aunty is right here as well as Jack's mother. If you knew anything you would know kids can be shits of things to control at the best of times."

"Rhia" Ianto said softly as he watched her body slam the woman back from the scooter, "It's OK, Gray has my back."

The little boy had swapped the plastic utensil for the one he had hidden in the chair when they got there and the butter knife glinted as he snarled animalistically at the woman, one hand reaching back for his beloved niece as the other held the knife out.

"See?" the woman shrieked, "All heathens!"

"Yes" Jack said as he flipped the badge at the security descending, making them pale as they stepped back from him, "We are all heathens here madam."

Ianto looked up at his Cariad and felt a swell of love, reaching out to hook his coat and pull him back, "Jack, my darling I love you so much."

"Are you OK babe?" Jack looked down and smiled as he let Byrd slide into Ianto's lap.

"Are you kidding?" Ianto grinned, "I'm bloody grand. Also, it appears I am a heathen."

"What is a heathen?" Dahlia asked as she calmly disarmed her son.

"Us" Jack replied happily, watching the security disperse the crowd nervously. "We are heathens Mama."

"Oh good" she said as she kissed Gray and handed him a banana instead, "As long as we are clear."

"Oh yeah" Ianto slumped as Rhia started to snort with mirth, her hand covering her mouth as her eyes shone with merriment and Ianto poked his tongue at her, "All Heathens here."

.

.

.

Brose 1001 ….yes harness and leash are brilliant. Jem was a runner, pure and simple fucktard when in public and anyone who has not had a runner will not understand the pure terror of a parental chasing the little shit as they peel along at top speed into people, inanimate objects ….traffic….

One old lady one day was chastising me while my darling was in tantrum mode and I lifted said darling sweetie shit and offered him to her, "Do you want him?" She looked horrified and admitted that she hadn't had any children of her own.

The battle for supremacy is never ending when it comes to your children. LOL


	37. gifts

Rhiannon walked to the SUV and watched Jack help Ianto into the back. As he returned the scooter to its bay Rhiannon leaned in and before Ianto could react she reached out and touched his stomach.

"Ianto?" she said softly, "Is that…is that a Tumour?"

Ianto remembered their grandfather and his slow painful death as the liver cancer ate him alive and he swallowed as he saw it from her point of view.

"Get in" he hissed and she clambered in as the door started to close.

"This is a secret, a big, huge, unbelievable secret and don't you dare go off on one" Ianto growled and she nodded as she sat and waited, watching the little boy as he fussed with Byrd's car seat affectionately.

"I am an experimental test subject" Ianto began as Jack climbed into the driver's seat and then froze as he saw the extra passenger.

"Testing for what?"

"Male pregnancy" Ianto replied, "You see, it's a new thing and it is still in the experimental stages, will be years before it's public. Still bugs and you know how the medical licensing board is, well it's a bloody nightmare Rhia, and the paperwork, Christ on a donkey, years! Anyway…Jack went first to see if it would work. Byrd is ours and Jack carried her. This time it's my turn and I am carrying our son."

Ianto pulled up the clothing to reveal the healthy little bump, "A boy. I am having a wee stinker."

Rhiannon stared and then looked over at Jack, "So…that's why you were sitting at the table like that, all crunched under it that time? I thought you didn't have pants on or something."

Jack stared at her with raised eyebrows, "We just tell you a state secret and that's your response?"

She shrugged.

"Jones" Ianto said softly, "Jones all the way."

Jack sniggered softly, "Right. Yes. I was pregnant, Byrd was cooked in me, now our little boy is growing in his Taddy. This is all delicate and secretive and if the other drug companies got wind of it we would be in a shit-storm, not to mention the ethical dilemma."

"Ethical?" she frowned.

"They might claim the kids don't have souls as they are genetically created, or that no mother means no soul or some shit" Ianto shrugged, "They might try to kidnap me, imagine a pregnant man means big money to the right people."

Now Jack saw her face transform in to the Jones Glare of Doom and he knew they were safe, turning back to start the engine, "Can I give you a ride home Rhia?"

"Yes please" she settled happily and clipped in, "This is a lovely big beast of a thing."

"Bigger than the old one" Jack agreed, "You don't know anyone that wants one do you? The trade-in price they offered was a bloody joke so I said no without realising it means I have to get rid of it myself."

"Oh" Ianto blinked as he listened to Jack lie and realised what he was doing, "What about you Rhia? Gods, I would love to free up the garage again, three vehicles is stupid. We only need one each so when Jack is at work I still have this one for the kids and groceries. Mama Dahlia doesn't drive ya see."

"You sound like a stay at home mom" she giggled.

"Well, I still work part time but I am finding myself enjoying this whole parenthood thing" he gushed, "This was a surprise when Jack bought it home but isn't it grand? The last one was lovely but having his Mama living with us as well, it needed a lot more room for soooo much shit. I had no idea babies need so much."

"Tell me about it" she huffed, "David's footy gear, Micha's horse riding stuff…oh thank you by the way. The riding lessons were such a lovely idea. She looks so damned cute up there."

"I got the last picture you sent on the fridge" Ianto grinned, "She needs new jodhpurs soon, text me her sizes and I can get that as part of her Christmas gift."

"Oh you spoil them" she sighed.

"Well, you don't let me spoil you so I have to do something" Ianto teased. "The other SUV, you want it?"

"It's just a size smaller than this one" Jack called over his shoulder, "purple."

She gasped as she clasped her hands together "Purple? I love purple, almost as much as pink! But… you cant' afford it."

"With what the company is paying us? Are you kidding?" Jack laughed, "We're gonna be rich over this MPreg breakthrough!"

Ianto grinned at his husband in the rear view mirror and then covertly texted Tosh to find a purple people mover please. After all, Jack had been lying like a trooper about having a spare but knew Ianto wanted to gift one so badly. So did Tosh who guessed right away, the text reply was a picture of one, it's paintwork flecked with pink sparkle in the deep purple and he told her to get it thanking her for remembering his sister's love of all things pink, grinning as he held the phone up to Rhia, "see? Soooo not me."

Her squeal was epic.


	38. robe noises are real!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://postimages.org/)

It was official.

He was fat.

He grunted as he tried to reach his foot again, the bloody slipper almost on but needing a push but as he got there it….

Fell off.

Ianto grunted as he shifted closer to the edge of the bed and leaned over, well OK tipped sideways and then came the need to pee.

NOW

Fuck.

Ianto rose and waddled to the bathroom where he opened the only robe that didn't sound loud when he walked, yeah right, don't fucking scoff. Robes make noises, really.

He stood and sighed as he emptied his poor bladder then looked over and got a glimpse of himself in the mirror.

Fat.

God.

He finished and shook, then let his hands slide over the now fat pudding poking out, Jack said it was lovely and it wasn't as big as it was going to get but damn, it looked so weird. His innie was an outie and there were fine lines, veins visible. Jack was putting cream on the bump each night singing softly as he did so making Ianto believe he was loving the baby, not him as he did so.

OK.

He knew he was entering the 'poor me' stage of things and he really hoped he didn't do the crying thing Jack had done but deep down he kinda knew he wasn't far off as he slouched, letting it all hang out.

"Oh wow" Jack said from the doorway, "Look at you standing, he looks so sweet hanging there over your tackle."

"Tackle?"

"Yeah, the lure you wriggled to catch me like some king fisherman!" Jack crooned. "Impossible to resist a nibble!"

"I feel so heavy, I feel it pulling on my chest and diaphragm" Ianto sighed.

"Well, I think it's time to start talking about the lift" Jack said softly, "We can have it installed in a few days where the laundry cupboards are. I know you want your own bed, you hate it down here."

"I do" Ianto finally agreed, the thought of the mess his home would be in while it all happened made him cringe.

"And we go to the lake while it happens" Jack offered, watching Ianto' face change and he turned to graze him as the bump brushing against Jack's hip.

"Oh Cariad, really?"

"Mama can come and mind the Byrd the Grayson while we spend some time in the bathtub, Christmas is almost here and it might be the last chance before the snows" Jack smiled, "Mama will love the idea. The Lilacs can mind the furies."

"Your mother is too excited with her knitting" Ianto sighed, "maybe a change of scenery will encourage her to put those needles down for a while, the clicking is driving me mad."

"I know" Jack sighed, "She keeps asking if I can measure Owen. Like….all of him."

"What?" Ianto frowned as he canted his head.

"Head to toe measurements, do you think she's knitting a coffin or something?" Jack frowned.

I'll tell her, I know his measurements" Ianto laughed softly as he leaned against Jack and breathed him in, "But I can't take the chair."

"The off roader" Jack said with glee, watching Ianto frown, "I got a heavy all terrain cart."

"You're kidding" Ianto leaned back to study his husband's face and saw excitement that could only mean some huge thing was already waiting for them.

"You should see the knobbly tyres" Jack gushed, "Byrd is gonna love going fast around the lake path."

"Oh Gods" Ianto sighed, "I take it you have a harness for her?"

"Yeah" Jack was racing to get the brochure and Ianto waddled back to the bed where Lucifer rustled around under the covers to let him in.

Ianto smiled as Byrd toddled in and clambered up, the wee step by the foot of the bed used for more that Ianto's shoe struggles.

"Hey baby" he crooned and Jack raced back it, tripping on the slipper.

"Shit, you trying to get that on?" Jack asked as he kept walking, looking back at it.

"Wanted to get up as I was bored and alone" Ianto pouted, "No you are here and I am happy to be back in bed. Go figure."

"Sorry babe, I never thought" Jack sat on the bed and leaned over to kiss Ianto's cheek, "You need some stuff. TV, the laptop and a bed table. Of course you are itching to do something. I have so many reports to troll through and Tosh is overwhelmed with the kids as well. You could really help us out with some inputting."

"Really?" Ianto perked up, "That sounds great."

"Right, I'll tell Mama when I got to get the lunch tray" Jack promised, "Then I will get Tosh to call around with some work, she will see how you've grown. Also, the babies are soooo cute. You were right about the crèche idea, the little buggers love the cage in the hub by the sofas. They can see us and are quite safe. Gonna take Byrd in tomorrow, I get the feeling Byrd would like that."

"Yes, she is quite attached to them" Ianto said diplomatically.

"Babe?"

"Hmmm?" Ianto was adjusting the bedding as he looked over at Jack.

"The Lilacs…they were asking a lot of questions about Andy and Rhys. They were surprised to find they can't breed like we can" Jack looked at Ianto and shifted in the bed, "Tell me. You know."

"Ys, they want to give them one, yes he is lovely and no, I can't tell you any more other than the fact Rhys and Andy are great parentals." Ianto whispered and Jack made a happy noise as he wriggled like an excited puppy, "So…looking at the ages between those I met…they will have a baby come Valentine's Day."

Jack made another happy noise as he wriggled and Ianto sighed as the baby responded, wriggling too.

Now he needed to pee again.


	39. a spoiler or two

The cabin was as lovely as ever and it was fun watching Gray explore the undergrowth, lunging out with banshee screams as he brandished the plastic sword he had found somewhere.

Ianto snorted and then settled to watch him and Byrd play in the leaves.

"He really wants a dog" Jack said softly, "I think we need to look into that, yeah?"

"Yes, I think a furry friend would help him feel more secure. A confidant." Ianto agreed as he smiled softly at his beloved.

"what about you" Jack crooned, "What do you need oh giver of life?"

Ianto giggled as he pretended to consider, then glanced at Dahlia who had those bloody knitting needles clacking away in the swing seat.

"I could really do with my ankles soothed" Ianto finally whispered, "If Mama doesn't mind watching the beasts."

Dahlia waved a hand at them without looking away from the kids, her needles moving as if on their own and Ianto thought of a Harry Potter spell at work, trying not to laugh as he was sure her limited knowledge of witches would not appreciate the moniker.

Jack watched Ianto as he laughed and saw the beauty in his glowing skin. He reached out to stroke his cheek, 'Gods, I love you."

"Sap!" Ianto snorted but Jack saw the delight in the comment, catching the hand and kissing it.

"I know we have so long together, to get things right, get thing wrong and muddle through" Jack said softly, "Please know how lucky I know I am. You could have left me so many times, turned away. I know I deserved it, I know I'm hard ot get through to. I still don't understand why you forgive me when I can't forgive myself but you always do. Waking up and feeling the warmth of you next to me is the most wonderful feeling, I don't think I will ever rest without you beside me darling."

"Jack, what is this?" Ianto asked with surprise, "What have you done now?"

Jack blinked and then started to laugh at Ianto's logic, "Darling, I done fell in love with you. I continue to over and over again. I can't help myself, each time you enter the room I go all stupid."

Ianto blushed, a deep lasting hue that was delicious to watch and he looked down at their joined hands, their rings glinting in the sunlight.

"I don't know if forever is achievable" Ianto whispered softly, the words catching on the breeze, "But I intend to aim for that."

"Me too baby" Jack grinned like a loon, "Me too."

Ianto leaned back and sighed, "And now I gotta pee. Goddess save, this little bugger is going to love a bouncy swing."

Jack rose to help him stand and gave him some privacy, letting him shuffle inside without an audience. He looked out over the water and felt the change in the air. The noise of the needles had stopped and Jack realised his mother had gone to watch the children closer.

It suddenly hit him that his mother had been back for a year. A year.

He swallowed back tears as he watched her laugh, throwing the leaves up into the air over the babies and watching them squeal with delight.

This then had him looking over at his daughter who was not yet one, the little niggle now full blown as he realised she was much older than that. She was at least 18 months old, maybe almost two.

Ianto returned and settled, turning his head to see Jack's frown.

"Cariad?"

"Byrd, when did she get so big?" Jack asked, "I didn't notice but…she's nearing her first birthday, right? Why does she seem older?"

Ianto shrugged, "I put it down to the Vortex swirling around her."

Jack blinked, then turned slowly to stare at his beloved, "Huh?"

"Don't you see it?" Ianto canted his head, "She…glows. Almost like a golden hue"

Ianto smiled, "She is growing about…not twice as fast but like…fifty percent faster?"

"What does this mean for her though" Jack sighed, "Timelines and such aside, her life expectancy…."

"I think she slows or something, this might be like a growth spurt thing that happens when she's been near the Tardis, don't forget the little bugger can't stay out of her. The adult her, along with the others were fine. The ages were OK. I think she might just be advanced due to our mixes of DNA. The twins and Bl…the other one. They were all the same age to my eyes so she stops progressing like this. Personally I blame the Tardis energy."

Jack grunted and looked back at them again, "Bl. You almost said a name."

Ianto considered the spoilers involved and whispered "Blaine. Her husband Blaine."

Jack stilled as he watched her throw her little head back, her reddish blonde curls glinting in the sunlight. "Is he good to her?"

"He is very forgiving" Ianto replied and Jack laughed, a deep belly laugh as he was given the insight that his daughter was a infuriating as he was and he rolled his head to see Ianto smiling softly as he watched their children.

"A good name" Jack nodded, "A good name indeed. A strong name."

"He is a strong man" Ianto shrugged, "Big, powerful yet gentle hearted. He seems to take a lot of deep breaths as she flitters about blowing shit up."

Again Jack's face cracked as he roared, his joy apparent and Ianto smiled as he decided it was not going to impact things all that much letting him know…after all, it would be worth it to watch his face when the Lilacs present the baby to Andy and Rhys.

When they argue over the name he was going to wear, watching his husband's face would be an amusement.

His amazement would be worth it.


	40. reconnect and recharge

Ianto was watching Dahlia as she scooped the little girl onto her hip and called out to Gray, following him down to the water where he chose a large rock to throw in, revelling in the splash. The clear, still water captivated him and it was the third time he had snuck away to make the waves that were missing. Cheering each time it faded to serene calm again.

For some reason it was highly amusing to him.

Ianto rose and rubbed his belly, looking to the front door as he shuffled past Jack who looked up from his novel with interest.

"Babe?"

"Cooling, I want a cardy" Ianto muttered and as he entered the cabin and went to close the door he found Jack behind him.

Driven by sensation, Jack pushed Ianto against the door, plastering their bodies together as the sound of the children and Dahlia's laughter faded when they walked around the water's edge.

Jack was grinding his hips into Ianto who gasped into his mouth as Jack tugged at their pants. Ianto shimmied his way out of them, all the while pushing Jack's jeans down. Reaching under Ianto's bump, he caught a glimpse of the engorged cock at the juncture between his thighs.

Jack lifted Ianto against the side table, and closing his eyes, he captured Ianto's lips just as he drove to the hilt. Ianto gasped into his mouth and wrapped his legs around his hips. Ianto felt _soooo_ good around his cock, a warm, fitted embrace.

He was leaning back on the edge of the table, the curve of his back helping roll the belly upward and Jack was able to embrace Ianto while inside him. Their unborn child was sandwiched between them in a loving clutch.

Ianto's head fell back against the wall, his breath coming in pants. He slipped his hand to the space where their bodies joined, caressing the cock that rested just above where his cock continued to sink into him.

Ianto arched against the wall. "Jack…oh gods...don't stop…don't stop… _please_ …" he came in a burst, calling his name again in a throaty voice, convulsing tightly around him. Unable to slow down, much as he didn't want this to end, he pounded into Ianto's warmth, his own climax coming in a roar as he pulsated into him.

As the pulses of his orgasm slowed, Jack leaned his forehead against Ianto's. The feel of his heartbeat against his chest grounded him.

Gradually, their laboured breathing slowed. He leaned back to look at Ianto. His eyes were closed. Not wanting to pull out, but realizing he would get uncomfortable soon if they remained where they were, Jack wrapped both arms around Ianto and leaned away from the table.

"Hold on," he said softly, carefully stepping away, holding him securely. In a few steps, he sat down on the bed, Ianto's knees coming to rest on either side of his hips. Fluid in his arms, Ianto fell against him, his head resting on one of his shoulders.

They remained that way for several long moments. Ianto finally lifted his head and sat back a little. Jack took a good long look. His belly was so lovely and luscious, weighted and round with deep pink outtie.

Ianto finally returned his gaze, his lower lip caught between his teeth. Jack wanted to lean over and kiss his luscious mouth again. Instead, he waited.

Ianto's chest rose and fell with a deep breath. He was exhausted.

Jack rolled them both into the bedding and settled, the blankets pulled up over them both.

As he settled back into the bed with his beloved mate gathered in his arms he sighed and kissed Ianto again, giving as much of himself as he could to the bonding, hoping some life-force might help him sleep without the discomfort of his hips and back that had been troubling him after the long drive.

Soon both were asleep, the afterglow not only scenting the room around them but the soft light was almost undetectable in the bright afternoon sunlight bursting through the large windows.

Almost.

As Yan sighed and rolled, the baby within seemed to stretch and settle again as well.

The love and contentment of all three thrummed.

.

.

.

.

Sorry for the last posting but our power has only just come back on, entire top of SI was knocked out Grrrr


	41. freak out

Jack stirred in the bed as he pulled his beloved closer, one hand travelling to that bump that seemed to call for attention as he nuzzled in the soft hair that smelt divine.

The soft sigh as Jack kissed and nuzzled was so lovely and he opened his eyes to see if there were stormy ones looking back, finding his love still sleep, a soft smile in repose.

Jack's smile faded as he stared, then carefully he extracted himself from the bed and stood gripping his hair with his fists as he watched the bump rise and fall with each breath.

Shit.

He turned to wake his mother, curled up in the other bed with the two children and he hesitated, wondering if she would only make things worse so he paced while texting Owen frantically.

Movement in the bed had him rushing back, "Hush love, go back to sleep it's still so early."

He stroked a pale cheek with a shaking hand and tried to will sleep through his fingers like a magician, those eyelashes fluttering telling him he was failing and then the eyes that opened to look up at him were full of adoration. He forgot his fear, leaning in to kiss, love, worship as their lips melded.

"Jack, why are you up walking around naked?"

"It's nothing, a charley horse, go back to sleep love" Jack tried not to sound like he was begging but the frown warned him that a rat was smelt.

"Cariad? What's wrong?"

"Baby, just lay back and let me love you" Jack soothed, his hands sliding around the bump as he felt for any telltale signs of distress and hands slid over his to enjoy the sensation of his stroking, then froze.

Jack looked up the bed and watched those lovely stormy pools go from confused to horrified within a nanosecond, blowing out to fill that china doll face as they stared at the hands covering his and then settle back on him.

"It's OK" Jack repeated, "I don't feel any tension or tightening. Baby is moving like it's all good in there, maybe we just need to give this a moment to …ah…adjust."

"Adjust?" Yan spluttered, "Jack, I've transformed in my fucking sleep, what do you mean it's all alright. Look at me!"

Hands fluttered across the naked body and Jack couldn't help but smile as he looked up and down the playground he loved so much.

"JACK!" Yan snapped, "Fucking focus!"

"Sorry baby" he grinned foolishly at her, "What could I do? You remind me of this…lickable form and expect me not to look? Look, I know the Doctors said no Yan until the Chrystal was strong enough, well…how do we know it wasn't and so it did?"

Yan's frown told him that she had no idea what babble he had just spewed out.

"Sweetling, the Doctor said no transformations until the shard had recovered. You transformed of your own free will. So….I say it's recovered?" Jack shrugged, "You are here, bumpy is here. Ah…Owen is here?"

Jack grimaced as the sound of gravel hitting the side of the cabin resembled machine gun fire, the motorbike kicking up the gravel as Owen skidded to a halt outside.

Then the footfalls as he ran in and looked around, Yan thinking of that angry little racoon in the sci-fi movie they had watched. She felt her chest ease as the panic wore off and she reached back to rub the bump.

"Right, ya bloody egg!" Owen muttered as he knelt and got out the PDA waving it about and frowning at the bump like it was all his wee innocent fault.

"Well?" Jack demanded.

"Congratulations, it's a bloody baby, now shut up I'm working here!" Owen snapped and Yan snorted at the bluster.

"Owen, I feel…hungry. Fine" Yan frowned, "The pain in my hips is gone, have they moved to a child bearing size? Gods, am I a heifer?"

"Don't be a bloody twat!" Owen snapped, "You are fucking gorgeous as always, you look great. Yes, a birth canal and everything where is should be. Prefect."

Yan flopped back with relief as Jack moved from foot to foot, "But bed-rest, right? I mean, we don't want it to fall out."

Yan raised her head to stare at Jack at the same time as Owen did, the twin gapes enough for him to grimace in apology for the brain fart.

"OK, so maybe I am still freaking out a tad, OK?" Jack flapped his hands, "Fucking shoot me!"

Yan giggled softly as she left her head fall back and a small noise had Owen turning in time to see Gray approaching with his little knife clenched.

"Oh great, now it's time for the filleting" Owen snarked, "Calm down changeling, look. We have nothing to fight about."

Owen moved aside and Gray saw Yan, his face lighting up as he raced for the bed and made little squeaking noises, rubbing against her face with his nose.

"Hush now Cariad" she crooned, "I am sure other me told you it would be OK, just like I did, right?"

Gray grinned as he leaned in close and kissed her face, then nuzzled at her earlobe. It was so faint only she heard it and it almost brought tears as she struggled to keep the secret for him, to pretend it hadn't happened.

Gray whispered.

"Taddette"


	42. settling

Since the transformation and all clear from Owen things had started looking up.

The elevator had been installed and she had promised to use it, the chair in the corner sat on primly as her belly sat on her legs and Gray was so excited to have her back as he rubbed the bump affectionately and looked adoringly at her.

Of course, the problem became Byrd who was jealous of her uncle's diverted attention but once he settled down things went back to normal in her little world with him sitting at her wee table eating tiny sandwiches and drinking from tiny cups, thinking it was all hilarious.

Of course, the fact Dahlia kept food coming was a good incentive a well.

Then…

Yan was humming softly as she wafted into the room, the large silky muumuu rustling around her bare ankles as she bent to place the tray of cupcakes down and Gray's eyes flicked down to her poor swollen ankles.

"I know sweetling" she crooned, "Your brother has promised me a nice foot massage when I stop. Don't worry, I can sit and do some paperwork now."

She bent down and kissed his forehead then swung to kiss her dumpling too, her blonde locks falling forward and Gray reached out to hook them back and stroke her face.

"I love you too" she whispered then was gone with a swish and scent of apple lingering.

Byrd looked at Gray as he leaned out of his chair to make sure Yan was using the elevator and she smiled at him.

"Share" she said softly and he turned to her with surprise.

"We share Taddy" she said happily, "Cos we can."

He nodded happily, offering her first cake.

Yan entered the kitchen and Jack was sitting at the table waiting, "Babe! You promised."

"Just feeding the dishwasher love" she smiled, "Mama is snoozing by the fire."

"Awwww" Jack rose and crept into the main room to find his mother had fallen asleep, her knitting slid to the floor and a cat was happily entwined in it like it had been fighting a sea creature or something.

"Lucifer, you little shit!" Jack hissed, "She's gonna kill you!"

The answering tail flick, and vacant stare before the fresh attacking was a clear indication that he really didn't give a rats arse. After all, Taddy would save him. So there!

Yan entered and Jack find himself struck again, watching her glow as she moved to throw another log on the fire, then settle on the sofa, raising her feet and dropping them into his lap.

"Tend me!" she said in an imperious voice and he laughed as he reached for the lotion, starting above the swollen ankles and gently massaging as she relaxed and sighed happily.

"He's settled" she said after a while, "I can feel him like…he's drifting."

Jack had thought she was talking of Gray but then knew it was his son that was drifting so he looked at the large bump and watched as Yan's dainty hands gently rubbed.

Then she started to sing and he was lost, his hands stilled as he listened to the Welsh lullaby and even Gray and Byrd running in to listen didn't make him look away. He was transfixed by her beauty, her poise and most of all…those stormy Jones eyes he knew so well.

Knowing the birth would be via Yan was such a relief, Ianto's male body not having to undergo a C-section or anything which Jack had secretly had nightmares about was such a boon and he knew that she would be a star come delivery day.

First Christmas was here, something he was doubly excited about …Gray and Byrd's first Christmas.

Yan was more chill than Ianto would have been too, meaning he was going to get away with SOOOOO much more and he was grinning as he thought of the little four wheel motorbike hidden in the garage for Byrd, the one a size larger for Gray. They had the back yard for them so why not. He could imagine them zooming around the trees as Yan scolded. Ianto would have had a cow worrying about head trauma or lost limbs but Yan was going to shrug and scold him gently.

Speaking of cows, Lucifer was stalking over to Yan with some wool wrapped around his erect tail, pulling Dahlia's knitting along like a fisherman's net caught on the Kraken, wailing morosely.

"Darling, did the big bad woollies get you" Yan crooned as she let a hand drop to rub a little black head and she effortlessly swept the knitting off as the kit looked at her like she was the second coming.

"I love you" Jack sighed happily, "We are so blessed."

"Yes Cariad" she yawned, making him pull at the knitted rug behind the sofa. He covered her and rubbed her legs as he watched her nod off to sleep, the kids laying by the fire snoozing too.

When Dahlia woke she wasn't even annoyed about the knitting.

"Wasn't Owen's colour anyway" she said cryptically.

* * *

 


	43. whales and other creatures

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://postimages.org/)

Dahlia was watching Yan as she rubbed her bump affectionately, sipping her cup of hot chocolate.

"Might snow" Yan said conversationally as she let her head fall back to catch the last of the sun, her long blonde locks bouncing over her shoulders.

"It suits you" Dahlia said softly and Yan looked over at her with that eyebrow.

"Motherhood" Dahlia said happily, "Jack was so frightened about Ianto and the birthing. He loves him…you so much"

"He is a lovely Twypsn" she agreed as she let her face turn to the sun again.

"I missed you" Dahlia blurted, "Don't get me wrong but as him, I see you as a little boy with no mama. You…you are so self assured, so powerful in your own right. Like the women of my time, you don't need assurance or comfort as your male self does."

"I never really thought about it" Yan shrugged, "I think you are right though. In this form I don't feel inadequate or judged. I do think this is the me I might have been had I been happy as a child. Like, this part of me was protected and he took it all. I know Yan didn't exist back then but it is sort of like that."

"Well, I love both of you" Dahlia said happily, "I am now starting to see that you are both the one person, just different clothes."

"Very different clothes" Yan giggled and both women took a moment to enjoy each other before looking over at their children, Gray on his hands and knees as Byrd rode him like her horsie, then she laid across his back and hugged him, humming happily.

"So glad they get along" Dahlia smiled.

"He knows it's her that saves him, he understands the whole timeline thing and is thankful" Yan agreed, "Also….he has a lovely wee heart, just like his brother. You raised them well."

"Thank you" Dahlia preened.

"I need to pee again" Yan said with a dramatic flop in the chair that had Dahlia giggling again, then Yan rose to waddle inside and Jack stepped around the doorframe sheepishly.

"I didn't want to interrupt some serious womenfolk time" he said and then squealed as she slapped at him.

"You are such a bugger!" Yan laughed, "Get out of the way or you clean up the mess!"

"Oh gods, I remember that feeling" Jack groaned, rushing ahead to open the toilet door and Yan groaned as she sat, then sighed as she looked up at Jack.

"As a man, I never understood the whole 'seat' drama but now as I sit here on the cold porcelain I wonder…why is the seat not left down when this is MY privy?" Yan said in a dreamy voice.

"Oops?" Jack grimaced.

"It's fucking cold!" Yan growled, then giggled as she slapped at him some more, then let him help her stand. She drew the line at him wiping though, preferring to do that herself as he looked around and asked if she wanted a bidet installed.

"Never understood those and Byrd would drink from it like a bloody dog or something" Yan shook her head, "Think it was the drinking fountain at the park. Or wash the dog in it."

Jack considered arguing but then saw that she was right, after all he would have as a child so he shrugged and helped her back out where Gray was low laying on his back with Byrd on top of him like he was a mattress, both cloud gazing.

"You aren't squashing your uncle Gray are you?" Yan called out as she settled back in the chair.

"My Gray!" Byrd roared back without looking and Yan sighed as she watched his little hands reach out to steady his squasher.

"Little shit, takes after her father than one" Yan muttered and Dahlia sighed as she nodded.

"Franklin was like that too" Dahlia replied, "Always had a comeback."

Yan coughed and then looked up at two people were fighting for the jug of water.

"It was just a cough" Yan assured them, "I'm not gasping for water. If I need you to throw water over me I am sure this blow hole will sound."

She pointed at the stomach and Jack looked horrified, "Yan you are beautiful. You are not fat or a whale, don't you dare…"

Her giggle stopped him and he placed his hands on his hips, "Are you playing with me young lady?"

"Oh Cariad" she purred softly, "You are so easy!"

"For you my love, always" he grinned as he slid his hands around bumpy, leaning in for a kiss, "always."

"Good" she whispered as he leaned in to suck at a earlobe, "Because we have that long to try that promise out."

Jack could only grin like the Cheshire cat he was, cuddling his cream.


	44. purple poise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://postimg.cc/image/ibn0xq59b/)

"You said wash the dog" Jack said later as he folded the clothes Yan had discarded as too small.

"Hmm?"

"In the loo, you said 'wash the dog' like…like we had one" Jack said, his face hopeful and Yan smiled softly as she saw her female self being manipulated. But really, was the idea of a dog so bad?

Jack caught the flicker of amusement and grinned gleefully as she shrugged and went back to pulling out dresses and flicking them at him. Then she saw the one she wanted.

"Ahhh, that will look lovely" Jack smiled as she held it against herself and it draped around the bump.

"Yes, lovely curtains" she muttered as he snorted, knowing she was being funny, not self depreciating like Ianto.

"Hungry?"

"Yeah, actually" she wrinkled her nose in that adorable way Byrd does and Jack raced off to see what his Mama was doing, pleased to find her setting the table.

"Is she hungry?"

"Yeah Mama" Jack grinned, "Ravenous!"

The children ran in and Gray lovingly helped Byrd onto a chair and then climbed up too, looking at the sandwiches with glee as Byrd hooted for a piece of water melon.

"Melly!" she said excitedly and he chose her a piece, kissing her cheek as he placed it in a grabby little hand.

"Left" Dahlia said softly as Yan wafted in wearing the pretty purple piece of fabric.

"What's that Mama?" she asked as she placed a cushion on a chair before sitting, sighing as she took a moment to let her head fall back.

"She has it in her left hand again."

"That's because she's left handed" Yan yawned, "Always has been. So am I!"

"You are?" Jack asked.

"Was made to use my right, use it out of habit now but I am left handed" Yan said, picking up a spoon and twirling it to show her dexterity.

"But…why were you made to hide it?" Dahlia frowned as Gray listened as well, his face one of extreme interest.

"Because when I was young it was believed that lefties were inferior" she snorted as she placed the spoon down, "Of course things have changed and now it is commonly accepted that we are simply all unique in our own way."

"Baby, there is no one else like you" Jack assured her, "Common doesn't even touch you. Enigma, mystery, riddle, puzzle, Unique goddess. These words maybe. Common, never!"

"Stop it!" she blushed happily as a hand slid to the bump and Jack watched her reach for a sandwich.

"So" he said as he glanced at her again, "Car ride later?"

"Take them, not me" she sighed, "I would want them all, you know I would. Mama would insist. Just take them and explain that the others will get other families so Gray doesn't panic. Just…not a puppy. Get one grown or half grown that is toilet trained, OK?"

At the word puppy Byrd had stopped chewing on her melon, the rind looking like a weird mouth as her eyes bugged at her parentals, the word had let the cat out of the bag and she was trying really hard not to explode.

"I promise one not too big or boisterous either" Jack agreed, "One that won't knock bubba over…or you. One that doesn't need constant exercise or supervision. I will ask questions not go for the cutest one. Promise."

Yan snorted as she watched him cross his heart with a finger and rolled her eyes, "Hope to die?"

Jack grinned like one of the kids and she knew whatever came home it was likely to be bloody mad thing, they say dogs are like their owners and if Jack chose it would be chaos.

"Gray needs to have a choice in this too" she said softly, "It will be his friend too."

Yah, yeah!" Jack was jiggling now and she ate another sandwich as she watched him parody their daughter who was jiggling too.

"For the love of the goddess, go!" she waved her hands, "Just don't come back with a car full!"

Jack leapt from his chair as did Byrd and although Gray had no idea what was happening he followed his little love.

As they peeled out Dahlia turned to Yan and frowned, "What was all that?"

"A dog" Yan rose to place her plate in the dishwasher, "I finally gave in."

"But…you already have the dog things from the other month" Dahlia frowned, "You…you were going to get one anyway."

"Yes, but now he thinks he won" she said with a soft sigh, "Now it will be HIS dog. The cats never really appealed because they are ours. Don't you see? Jack needs a friend too."

"Ah!" Dahlia smiled as she understood, Jack had to like the dog as he would be the one doing things with it and the kids.

"I want a wee walk around the garden, come show me where you are going to put the winter roses" Yan said an the two women walked slowly, Yan's hand on Dahlia's arm to steady herself as they walked up the small steps and the Lilacs squealed with delight at her purple dress.

Yan reached out to touch the belly of the pregnant one and leaned in close, "Hello Sweetling."

"Oh, that's a solid bump!" Dahlia said as she smelt a rose, "A strong one."

"Yes" Yan smiled as she rose once more, "He will be."

As they walked back toward the house Yan glanced back, "Has to be to survive that mad woman."

The day was drawing near for his birth and she hoped Rhys and Andy were ready.

It was going to be epic.


	45. That's Lucky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://postimages.org/)

_So, here I was sitting in this jail thinking I was done._

_I'm lucky you came along._

_Hang on, I need to go back._

_Sorry._

_I do that, a bit excitable, me._

_So, anyway. I don't remember my mum, I do remember two brothers and a sister but it's kinda hazy now. I was the last to go and it was pretty darned cold, I can tell you that I was starting to think no one wanted me but I was lucky, but anyway, where was I?_

_Oh yeah._

_He-he right. Sorry, so…_

_I was thinking it was just another day at the pound, right? The last family had thrown me away because I had eaten a toy or something but really, the kid kept shoving it into my mouth and a binky sounds like a num-num right?_

_Little shit set me up, sure of it._

_So I've been here like forever, ever since the car hit me. It hurt, I can tell you, getting wiped off my feet and it was really scary because I didn't know the people who grabbed me up and whooshed me along and then there were lights and yelling. I was lucky I didn't die then and there in the snow, right?_

_But back to the lights!_

_I've seen the movies these weird human creatures watch I was sure I was being abducted by aliens, well, maybe I was. Ya know they did probe my butt with something and that was not nice, believe me and I was like whoooooa, what the hell is that?_

_In here, see? In my butt hole! Let me move my tail, see? That's mine._

_You know…_

_You are the first one to actually listen to me._

_Thanks, I mean that._

_Right, where was I… oh yeah!_

_The car hit me. Right? Then the anal probing and this weird gas…I'm telling ya, it was aliens. Aliens all the way and I'm lucky to be alive._

_So, they took my eyeball._

_Don't know why._

_Maybe it's worth something somewhere like …you know, for other aliens. Maybe it's lucky, like me._

_So, right. Shit, look at the size of that moth!_

_Have you ever seen one that colour?_

_What?_

_A butterfly, really?_

_Huh._

_So! No eyeball. Weird huh? Lucky though, lucky to be here and now you are here and you seem nice. I like your hair, do you taste nice? You smell pretty good, I like the little ones, you always have food. Food is pretty nice ya know, I like food. Do you like food?_

_Look, I have a food bowl here, we could …er…sorry. Where was I?_

_I've had lots of owners but they always bring me back, apparently they only have like…a certain amount of time with me and then I need to be returned like a DVD form the store or something because I always seem to be getting shoved back in a cage like this._

_My eyeball! Right. Its ok ya know, I do have another one so it was no big deal and I can still see pretty good on this side._

_See?_

_Wow, your parental is large, isn't he? Does he always run up and down like that? Oh, looking for another one of you? Really? Ah, not the pale one a bit bigger than you is it? Coz if it's him you are looking for he's behind me in my kennel._

_Lucky huh? That you stopped here._

_I already tasted him and he tasted alright too, he seemed tired so he decided to have a snooze. He seems used to cages too._

_Do you think I look OK with this collar thing? I never used to wear one and it feels kinda funky, like something is about to strangle me, do you wear a collar? I see you have a leash but…_

_Hi by the way._

_I like you._

"Dadda!" Byrd called as she stood outside the cage watching the dog grin back at her, his one eye full of excitement, "Found 'im."

"Who!" Jack yelled with raw hope, "Did you find Gray?"

"Yeah!"

Jack pounded over, falling to his knees and he laced his fingers through the mesh to look into the back of the enclosure where the dog had run to show them, dragging his dirty rug off the sleeping child.

"Oh thank the gods!" Jack slumped against the mess, "Little shit! Was always getting me in trouble when we were kids."

"Captain Harkness?" a woman approached, "Did you find one to your liking?"

"Yeah!" Byrd pointed and she looked surprised as she looked into the cage.

"Him? Are you sure, "he's not as young or as…"

"HIM!" Byrd roared angrily, insulted in his behalf even if he kept saying it was OK, he knew he was ugly.

"Right" Jack grimaced, "He's a bit big…I promised Tadda that he wouldn't be..well. We have seen bigger ones, right? So, he's not small but he's not too big, right?"

Byrd grinned as they both spoke at once, her father's voice over the doggie's was similar and she saw the likeness as they both hoped from foot to foot while considering.

Then of course they looked to her.

She nodded calmly like Taddy would.

"Right then!" Jack clapped his hands, "We will take him then."

"Right-o, we need a name for the adoption papers then" the woman said and Jack looked at Byrd with raised eyebrows.

"What?" Byrd shrugged with her hands splayed in typical toddler fashion.

"What do we call him love?"

"Oh!" she grinned, "He's Lucky."


	46. Bonding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://postimg.cc/image/wuu5z7b9r/)

Yan knelt to look at the dog as he sat calmly staring back.

"Lucky" she tried the name and watched the dog's head swivel as he canted his head.

"Stinkpot named him" Jack said as he pointed at their daughter, "Was smitten. I know we talked about one a bit smaller but…"

"No. No he's lovely" Yan smiled and the dog's head returned to a more natural pose as it blinked its one eye at her.

"They don't know how old he is, but think about three" Jack continued to talk as he watched his mother join in the examinations.

"well, he seems like a nice enough guy, good choice dumpling" Yan nodded, "You and Gray had best go show him his things, they are in the main room by the fireplace."

"They chose one that needed extra love, just like my tripod cat" Dahlia gushed once they were gone, "How lovely. He needs lot of love."

"Yes" Yan agreed softly, "Poor guy. Seems a lot of families had passed him back as he can't handle his sense of humour. We will have to learn to adjust. Family is all about adjustment, is it not?"

"Oh sweetheart, your poor ankles, come on off to bed!" Dahlia fussed and Yan sighed as she defiantly waddled out to the deck instead, sinking into the mattress out on the daybed and folding her arms.

Dahlia threw her arms up and went to fetch a blanket.

"He did seem friendly" Jack knelt to stroke Yan's face, "Gray had snuck into his cage and was asleep in his stinky bed. I think they all need a bath now."

"Well, bubbles will encourage them both in, maybe Lucky should have one too, get the stench of the pound off him" Yan suggested and Jack rushed off.

Yan waited a good fifteen minutes before rising and tiptoeing along the hallways towards the laughter and screeching, popping her head around the corner of the bathroom door to see what she had guessed might be happening.

Lucky hadn't wanted the bath, had struggled and escaped, chased by two naked children and an irate Dad around the house as Dahlia scolded, then Jack had finally caught him and struggled with the wriggle monster back to the tub to dump him into the bubbles which had poofed up into the air and landed on the floor, making it slippery and so Jack had then slid onto his knees. Falling forward with the dog still in his grip and gone headfirst into the bath as well.

The children had decided this was quite fine and had climbed in as Jack flailed and roared, Dahlia chastising him for not taking his clothes off first and by the time Yan had arrived Dahlia was the only one not in the bath tub.

So Jack sat in the middle of the tub fully clothed with a look of total doom, a dog in his lap. A child either side was piling bubbles on his head as the dog lovingly licked them off. Byrd stood with a hand on his shoulder to steady herself as Gray knelt, both looking equally pleased with themselves for making this game.

"Awwwww, bonding" Yan gushed with syrupy sweetness as Dahlia clasped her hands with glee.

Jack's eyes narrowed even more.

"You knew!" he snarled, "Somehow you knew this would happen."

"And you don't even have to be a Time Traveller to know you, a dog and a bath were a bad combination!" Yan giggled as a line of bubbles slid down the side of his face, only to have a large tongue take them away.

"ewwwww" Jack howled, throwing his head back and the next handful of bubbles his daughter was about to dump on his head landed in his mouth.

"Opps!" she giggled gleefully before bending to scoop up more.

Now Jack was spluttering and spitting out bubbles as the children shrieked with glee, Byrd standing with her hands gripping the side of the tub as she looked over at her Taddy and Yan laughed back, her own hands on her knees and the two looked like big and small version of each other with matching stances and open mouthed braying.

Jack felt his heart explode as he watched his daughter match his beloved and he sighed happily, forgiving the dog as it licked him once more and revelling in the sound of his mate's glee.

Yan sat on the closed toilet lid and scooped up a handful of bubbles, blowing them at her daughter who gleefully clapped her hands to pop them in the air.

Gray cheered and clapped as he egged her on and the dog looked over at him as if the reassure him that everything was fine and Jack wondered for the first time who had chosen the dog. Byrd? Or was this Gray's best friend as the dog gave soft woof at the boy and then turned back to watch the pretty one sitting over there with her pretty laugh.

Jack was about to comment when Lucky decided he was done and leapt out, his back foot catching Jack in the crotch and Jack yodelled as he clutched at himself and rolled into the bubbles, disappearing with a look of agony. Gray yelled and leapt out after his buddy, a naked flash of bum and bubbles as he ran after him and Byrd squealed, her arms held out to go too.

Yan shrugged and scooped her out and watched her race off with her wet hair curling around her like an angel's halo.

Then she looked down at her husband writhing in the water as he still clutched his bruised goods.

"Cariad, when you're done don't forget to scrub it out, gets too slippery after the bubble bath" she said with a blown kiss before following Dahlia out as the children hooted in another room.

Jack sat up and gaped at the empty room as he palmed his bruised balls.

The crown of bubbles said it all really as it slid around his head to become a beard.

Really?


	47. Boy in the Rain

Rhys and Andy sat awkwardly on the sofa as the large dog eyeballed them….literally.

Lucky sat between them and the wee one, his eye narrowed menacingly as he let them know he was on guard and he watched his boy slide around the chairs with his little knife as well.

"Hey Gray" Andy smiled, "Is that a new one?"

Gray stood up as he recognised the voice and smiled, showing the knife to Andy who made appropriate noises of interest. Rhys leaned back and watched the wee dot as she scampered over and put her arms up for a lift.

"Hello poppet" he crooned as he cuddled her, "What a big doggie."

"Lucky" she said happily, "He our furry brother."

"Wow, a furry brother" Rhys grinned as the dog lay down and licked a paw to show he was going to accept them if she was, "Cool."

"Hello boys" Yan wafted in, her dress a pretty one of three large stripes of colour and both men perked up as she settled and put her feet up with a soft sigh.

"Hells bells Digit, those ankles look ready to burst" Andy frowned, "Has Owen looked at those?"

"Yeah, just fluid. My poor kidneys are working overtime" she assured them, "Everything else looks OK. This heat is killing me. Christmas and I'm cooking in here."

"Mama Harkness does have the heating turned up a tad" Andy grimaced, "She does know that December is a cold period, right? She was here last winter?"

"Boeshane is a hot planet" Yan yawned, "She feels the cold. With me being near the end of things, she is spending more time in the house now so she's fiddling with the thermostat each time she comes in from her place. She means well."

"As long as you don't get the whole 'On Boeshane' thing again, it drove you balmy last time" Andy said softly, then perked up as Byrd left Rhys' lap for his turn. "Hello Princess."

"Lilacs coming" she said happily to him and Yan looked out the doorway as the entities glided in and bowed, then turned to Rhys and Andy.

"Ah shit" Rhys said with wonder as the small bindle was thrust at them and Andy pushed Byrd off, rushing to accept it with confusion. He looked down and his face softened as he looked down at the little cherub, the wide eyes staring back were so Rhys-like.

"Oh my darling" Andy crooned as he settled on the sofa with the bundle, opening it more to see little hands and a tiny wee belly that was also very Rhys-like.

"Awwww, look. An old soul that, look at how she looks at me" Rhys crooned over Andy's shoulder, "Hello sweetheart."

A smile.

"Well, you need to name him" Yan said as she handed a white cat absently to the Lilacs who all quivered and huddled around it with glee, their own delight evident as a new baby was offered in return for their gift.

"Cripes" Rhys looked at Yan, "We name it?"

"Him" Andy sighed as he checked the nappy, "Oh Rhys, he's a wee boy!"

"Rhys" Yan said calmly, "This is your son. They took you and Andy, like they did Tosh and Owen. You both said you wanted a boy. They cooked a boy."

"Bullshit" Rhys snorted, then paled as he looked at his own glare on the wee face.

"Language" Andy scolded, "Me darling doesn't like bad words, do you son."

Son.

Rhys' face lit up as he carefully took the baby onto his lap and they seemed to examine one another.

"Barney."

"No!" Byrd laughed, "He's a purple dino!"

"She's right, not fair to the kid to call him that." Andy snorted.

"It's raining again, like…he looks so fresh he must have been birthed in the storm last night." Andy considered, "Storm?"

"Uncle Storm?" Byrd looked out the window with confusion as she hadn't heard a Tardis and Gray shook his head to let her know there wasn't a visitor out there.

"Rain"

"Too girly."

"Rain on the brain" Byrd sang one of her nonsense songs as she peered at the baby, "Barney isn't a name, for singing in the rain, you are not to blame."

"Blaine." Andy blurted.

Rhys looked at Andy as Andy held his breath, then let it out. "Blaine. The Boy in the Rain."

"Ahhhhhhh, I love it" Rhys grinned, "Blaine Davidson Williams."

"Well, I was…well" Andy shifted in his seat, "If you make an honest man of me I was thinking of changing to Williams. You know, so we could all match like. Just have our boy called Blaine David Williams or something."

"Bloody hell, did you just propose?" Rhys spluttered with glee, Yan's feet crashing down as she looked at them expectantly.

"Well, I guess I did" Andy said happily, "Buggered if I'll be an unwed mother there boyo!"

The two men kissed over their son and Yan watched Byrd lean in to pull back the blankets for a closer look at the little boy.

"Blaine" she said as if chewing it over, then she smiled.

"Blaine Williams" Rhys said happily as he turned more for her to get a good look.

She nodded and then patted the baby softly, "He'll do."

Then she considered some more, "Harkness-Jones sounds better though. I will make him change it when I marry him."

The two men roared with mirth at the wee darling as Yan watched Jack hover in the doorway, his gaze going from the scene to Yan.

Yan gave a small nod, unable to deny the unspoken question and Jack grinned.

"Welcome to the family Blaine" Jack said jovially as he leaned over the sofa to look at his future son-in-law.

By the time Tosh and Owen arrived with the twins Byrd had managed to snag him and was sitting with him in her lap, happily stroking the little face as the baby looked back up at her with equal wonder.

"Oh he's lovely" Tosh gushed, "Look Hero, a wee friend for you, maybe one day…"

"He's mine" Byrd said as she looked up at her aunty, "But they are too, right? I can have all of them."

"Of course you can" Tosh crooned, "All of you can be one big happy family."

Yan ducked her head as she pretended to pluck at a lose thread and Jack frowned as he watched her squirm.

It was just starting to dawn on him that his daughter might be as greedy as him.


	48. bossy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://postimages.org/)

Tea was eaten with laughter and loud shouting, the babies all happily snoozing by the time the adults were done and they crept into the main room where they found Byrd curled around Blaine's little carrier Yan had produced.

The fact it was blue was not lost on either man, nor were the little boy's clothes neatly folded inside. They were surprised to find a little rattle with Blaine's name written on it already so it would not be mixed up with the others who all looked similar and were already named as well.

"I got them all done at the same time, got a discount" Yan shrugged when asked and the two men frowned as they looked at Jack, clucking as he flicked a lump of meat at the dog under the table.

"Do you think he's happy?" Jack asked "Does he need a collar?"

"He doesn't like them" Byrd said as she stretched and yawned, "He sez it chokes."

Yan shrugged as it is explained everything and began a crossword, her feet still sitting on the footrest and Jack slid to his knees to massage them gently.

"Oh, that feels lovely" Yan sighed as her head fell back.

"You're not far off" Owen said as he looked at her with a practiced eye, "You've dropped. Looks like the wee fella will be here for Christmas Day if you go in the next few days."

"What?" Jack's head whipped around to gape at Owen, "But…I've not finished the nursery."

"Nursery!" Yan spluttered, "You promised not to touch the bloody nursery!"

"Er…I didn't take anything away, I just…well…added a few things" Jack whimpered, "Like…he's a boy so …oh this little train crib was sooo cute, look."

Jack showed the photo on his phone of an old hand turned crib, a locomotive with the baby bed in the back that did look like it belong in a Victorian or Edwardian home. Yan was in love with it as she cradled the phone, "Oh Jack it's gorgeous. Old but will match Byrd's bed."

Jack perked up, "Yeah?"

"Perfect my darling" Yan assured him as she settled and considered things.

"A first Christmas for a lot of family" she said softly, "Oh Cariad, what a celebration."

"Just don't pop him out just yet!" Jack begged, "I want him to have a little separation from the others. Gonna be hard enough with the twins so close to little Blaine."

"Well, it would mean one big party per year" Yean said softly and watched as Jack processed.

"How big?"

"Well, if this one decided to arrive in the next few weeks then we could chose the date that is most central for all the birthdays, like…it would be early to mid December I guess and then have one massive birthday bash that is a prelude to Christmas." Yan knew she had him as his eyes glazed over at the prospect of a huge party and then another one for Christmas soon after.

"How big could I go?"

Yan smiled as she settled back, "Well, you know I would want Christmas a certain way, colour schemes and such for my own special time of the year so…I guess it would be up to you. We could say Christmas is mine and Birthday is yours."

Jack was wide eyed as he realised he was being given a pass, "Soooooooo bouncy castle? Petting zoo?"

"Zoo?" Owen squeaked and Tosh shushed him as she watched Yan handle her husband.

Yan hummed as she accepted Gray under the blanket with her.

"Horsies?"

Yan tried not to groan as she nodded.

"Soooooooo….."

"As long as nobody dies" Yan finished and Jack bounded out of the room followed by his minions….Rhys, Andy and Owen…leaving the women sitting there with the children.

"So. This is how it feels to be the wife" Tosh said blandly and Yan snorted.

"I would like to try that new apple cider, would you like a lemonade dear?" Dahlia rose, "Tosh? Dirty martini?"

Tosh blinked and looked over at Yan who pouted, "I would love one. Gods, get out damned thing. Yes, lemonade please Mama."

Soon the women had their gasses and Gray had one as well. A martini one with an umbrella as he sipped his lemonade through a bright pink straw. Lucky walked over and sniffed at the boy and then went to look at the babies, all asleep with Byrd watching over them happily.

"They're mine" she informed him, "But I will share. Have to learn to if we are all going to be together."

_Pack, Lucky thought as he agreed, Pack share._

"Yeah" she nodded, "This is mine."

Lucky sat and considered.

_Yes, he agreed, You need a pack. We all need a pack. You are pack to me. These little pups will be good pack for you once you train them a bit._

"Yeah" she frowned, "They will have to learn who the boss is!"

As she folded her little arms Lucky huffed with amusement.

_Yep._

_Her._


	49. waiting for the storm to come

Yan was humming as she lay on the bed, the room warmer since she had turned on the small panel heater and she knew Mama was busy and wouldn't come in to turn it off if she drifted off to sleep.

Jack was working and Owen was coming over later with Tosh to check on her progress as she seemed to have dropped, whatever that means.

Gray was watching his mother as she baked cupcakes, still amazed that you put something in that hot box and brought out something so yummy. Not at all like the cooking stone back on Boeshane.

Byrd had climbed up by Yan and was humming too, the song an old but popular one, Moonlight Serenade soothing all in the room, including in the womb.

Yan could practically smell the snow in the air, the storm predicted was gonna be a dozy and she hoped Jack had remembered to throw the frost cloth over the rose bushes and she was going to call out to ask for the phone to call him when she looked down and saw her darling child in slumber.

Byrd had finally petered out, her cupid's bow of a mouth a deep cherry red as the warmth of the room lulled her with her lips parted slightly. Her soft hair was in large waves today, something Yan found endearing as each day it seemed to be a different style, sometimes even a darker or lighter colour and she found it endearing that her daughter was part chameleon.

It had not bee pointed out to Jack but she knew he had noticed their daughter's ability to alter her appearance ever so slightly and Yan wondered if she knew she was doing it. Without a crystal she would never be strong enough to shift but it was nice to know there was enough power in her to be creative.

She hoped it would help keep her sweetling safe one day.

Lucifer was playing at the end of the bed and Yan watched as the cat swung around her ankle and lay pretending to attack her foot, so gentle that it tickled as his eyes went wild with cat fever and he showed his teeth.

"Evil little beast" she murmured lovingly as she reached out to stroke the cat with the toes he had just been gently mauling.

Yan went over the plans for the Christmas meal and reminded herself to get the Yorkshire puddings out of the freezer, having cooked them the week before to save time. They were a favourite of Owen's and she hadn't forgotten his joy in them.

The decorations were looking fantastic and she knew Mama was overly excited with her gifts already under the tree, gods she had made more than one thing per person as she revelled in the old customs. Yan went over her own guest list and hoped things would be OK, then decided to let it go as she knew the day would be more about the people not the presents.

A faint sound of laughter as Mama and her boy laughed about something and then Yan heard a soft crash, followed by more laughter. Some gingerbread men may not have made it based in the smell now wafting around the doorframe. Yan wondered if the birds were hungry as she heard the back door slam, the burnt offerings left to cool in the breeze.

The Lilacs were enthralled with the whole Christmas thing and their decorations were all shiny and sparkly, the lights making the entire backyard light up. Although pretty, Yan knew with the first snow fall it would be prettier.

Lucky padded in and checked Byrd, then did that weird doggy circle thing before settling to snooze on the floor in a small patch of sun.

He enjoyed the warm room as well, soon stretching out and sighing happily as he felt safe, warm and loved.

Yan hoped Mama felt the same way, slowly talking of Boeshane less and stating to call this home instead. She never wanted her children to forget where their family roots came from but at some stage Dahlia had to accept that this was home now, these children were of this time and this planet.

Yan rubbed her belly and felt the baby move, woken by the commotion in the kitchen and she started to sing again, lulling her baby back to sleep.

A time for rest now, before the storm predicted to come in the night.

Yan closed her eyes and prepared to drift, hoping Jack had remembered his spare socks.

His feet felt the cold.


	50. snowing

Yan woke and listened to the storm raging outside, shifting in the bed. The storm had blown in earlier than predicted and she sat up with alarm as she realised everyone was out in it getting caught. She reached for the coms sitting on the bedside table and opened the coms.

"Tosh?" she said calmly, "Is everyone OK out there?"

"It's a doozy" Tosh answered, "We already have it building up on roadsides, the problem is that it came in so fast that the rain had frozen on the roads, to form ice. The accidents are starting already."

"Oh my Goddess, is everyone accounted for?" she was worried now and not caring if it was evident.

"Jack and Owen went out on a retrieval as it all kicked off, they are about half a metre deep in snow trying to get back to the SUV with the containment box between them. They are cold, grizzly but fine. You know them, end of the world as their balls shrivel."

Yan laughed softly as she settled, "And the other two yobs?"

"Oi!" Rhys' voice came over the coms, his amusement making his voice hitch, "we're at the Hub thank you ya shit. Just got a bit of filing to do until the containment box gets here, we will catalogue and secure it and all head your way for the Christmas Eve feast."

"Oh, a Christmas Eve feast is it now?" Yan giggled as she imagined the man rubbing his belly, then she heard a faint cry in the background. "Who is that then?"

"Blaine, he wanted in with the twins. Was the sweetest thing. Panda got him out to change his wee bum and he's kicking off, wants back in with his mates" Rhys laughed softly, "like triplets, all cuddling together. Or naked monkeys."

Yan snorted, "I am sure the bond building will serve them well for their entire lives. All family."

"Yeah, he's not an only child. Not really. He had everyone to play with, grow with, belong to" Rhys gushed, "We are so lucky. God, think in time I could wangle a wee girl? Like your little gem?"

"Well, not like her, but in a year or so I am sure the Lilacs would love to cook a little girl for you." Yan smiled as he heard the delight in his voice, "But I assure you, you do NOT want a Byrd."

"Shit"

"Rhys?" Yan sat up, ignoring the twinge in her back from the sudden movement, "Is everything OK?"

"Ahhhhhh, hang on love" Rhys said distractedly and Yan blinked as she waited, moving to the edge of the bed as her worry grew and she waddled to the window, pulling back the curtains to look out at the back yard.

White.

The snow was in full flurry now, swirling and battering against the window pane, drifting down to cover the land in white shiny goodness.

"Tosh? Are they moving yet?" she asked as she suddenly knew what the curse was for.

"Just getting the SUV past a few drifts" Tosh sighed, "It's really blasting out there and they were up a side road. The plough has not been kind at the entrance to the road and they might have to…shit, did he just gun it? Great, really great. Bloody burry the thing then. Jack, was that the right idea? Well…Jack can you back out of the snow bank then?"

Yan held her breath.

"What tractor?" Tosh screeched, "Who parks a bloody tractor in a snow drift?"

"How bad is the damage to Black Beauty?" Yan sighed as she finally understood. They had tried to slam through the barrier and the tractor waiting in it hadn't budged.

"It's OK babe, we will just have to find another exit, shit" Jack huffed as Tosh patched him in, "You OK? You warm enough?"

"Yes Cariad" Ianto sighed softly, "Just want you all here before we get snowed in, this is really thick here in town."

"We'll be there within an hour" Jack soothed, "Huh? Owen would you…what do you mean….huh? Why? Well, I know I was talking to Tosh. Shit. Make that two hours, we have to go back as _someone_ left a PDA sitting on a bloody stump by where we parked."

Owen's voice in the background was harsh and whiny, telling Yan exactly who had set it down and forgotten it. After all, she had gone after him picking up at scenes often enough to know Owen never double checked his kit.

"Just hurry Cariad, I need you" Yan said softly.

"I know darling, I love you. We will get there as soon as we can, just have a nice hot bath ready because my feet are fucking freezing" Jack grumbled.

"I'm already heading to run one actually" Yan said calmly, "I need one."

"Awwww, tease" Jack laughed, "Lavender? Or that Citrus ol?"

"Neither" Yan answered as she stopped to grip the doorframe, "Just big and hot."

"Really?" Jack purred, "You minx."

"Jack, I love you so you be careful and remember you have a mortal with you, yeah?" Yan purred back and Jack laughed as he closed off. "Tosh? Is he still listening?"

"Sorry Yan, the SUV clicked out" Tosh answered, "I can get him back if you want."

"No, no. I needed to talk to you without him hearing, like I said he has Owen in the car and I don't want him to panic and crash or something" Yan said, then groaned softly.

"Oh my god" Tosh breathed, "you're not."

"Oh Gods, I think I am" Yan replied, "Going to get in that bath. If it's Braxton hicks then it will stop soon. If this is what I think it is I will need to be calm."

"We're on our way, we will be there as soon as we can get though" Tosh was excitedly gushing and the yelling in the background meant Rhys had still been listening and Andy's shrill squeals began as he panicked.

"If Andy is doing that running around flapping his hands like his hair is on fire slap him for me will ya?" Yan panted, then rubbed the tight stomach as a contraction hit, stronger this time and she swore softly.

"another?"

"Oh gods, it's not a twinge" she sighed as she started the water in the tub, "Tosh, I'm in labour."


	51. Time Gentlemen please

Yan had called out to Dahlia but there was no answer, probably had the radio on for the kids and Yan groaned as she lowered herself into the hot water feeling it creep up her back like a soft stroking hand.

She was glad Tosh was there on coms, her voice gently encouraging her as the sound of the boys arguing in the background filtered out and Yan concentrated on her friend's excitement.

"What are they arguing about?" she finally asked and Tosh snorted.

"The babies, apparently there is a problem with who had to change them to get them travel ready. Would you believe _someone_ said it was my job as I am the Mama?" Tosh said with incredulity, "Like…I have boobs so I can wipe a bum better than someone with supposed balls?"

"Oi!"

Rhys' voce was faint and Yan smiled at the banter, knowing it had all been said in jest and she groaned as a deep pain hitched, deep in her pelvis.

"Gods, it feels like I'm tearing apart, he is really wanting out" Yan grimaced, "Thank god I'm in female form, Ianto would have been done by now reaching for a butcher knife."

We are moving now" Tosh's voice was slightly breathless, she must be carrying one of the car seats, "We are coming love. You need anything?"

"Our men" Yan groaned, "Bloody fools out there making snow angels no doubt!"

.

.

.

.

Jack slipped again, cursing as his knee sank into the snow and he looked over to where Owen was laying prone, "Just don't move!"

"I doubt I could if I wanted" Owen snarled back as he held his head and tried not to writhe about, the impact of it against the rock when he had fallen had split the scalp and he knew the blood beneath him was quickly colouring and panicking Jack more, "You know a scalp lac bleeds more. I have lots more, I'm not dying."

Jack finally crawled over and checked for himself, "Shit. You will need stitches, here."

Jack removed his scarf and wrapped it around Owen's head, his handkerchief against the wound and he knew Ianto would be pissed as they were the monogrammed ones he had got him, also a wee bit relieved that Yan was waiting as her worry for Owen would trump any annoyance at the damaged gifts.

Both men clung to each other as they gingerly rose to walk over the slippery rocks and stones towards the SUV, Owen panting as the concussion he had been trying to ignore thrummed.

"Come on, fuck the PDA" Jack said as he hoisted him into the passenger seat, "I say it can go fuck itself sideways. We will send a kill order."

Owen's eyes lit up as he reached for the other PDA in the cab and tapped in the PDA's personal code to self destruct, turning to watch in the area where he last remembered placing it. Jack climbed into the driver's seat and smiled back catching his breath as Owen eagerly counted down.

The explosion in the back of the SUV startled them both and they screamed as they clutched at each other and then both turned to look between the seats at the smoke filling the rear.

"Er….I guess I did pack it then" Owen said with a bland face, "Huh. Go figure."

Jack looked back at him with his mouth open and then Owen started to snigger. Jack's mouth twitched and then he joined in as he popped the rear doors to vent the smoke.

"Tell ya what" Jack giggled, "You don't tell Yan the hanky and scarf are buggered and I won't tell that you blew up the SUV."

"Deal" Owen crowed as they shook on it and looked back again, glad of the fire resistant cabin space. Trust Ianto to know they would try to blow it up or burn it down at some stage.

Finally they started to move off, still giggling at their stupidity and Jack sighed, "Yan is so cranky today. Woke up and complained of back spasms and didn't want breakfast. Just then she sounded…hey, did she sound like she was stressed out you?"

Owen hummed and fiddled with Jack's PDA then froze and tapped the screen repeatedly while staring into space.

"Back spasms?" he repeated, "Like…stabbing, rolling, intense and constant or…"

"Coming and going, like a band tightening at times" Jack replied as he swing around a car that had spun out, "She said it was like someone was clinching it. On and off all night, she said."

Owen sighed and touched his coms, "Yan?"

"Hello Owen" came a terse reply.

"We're on our way, honest" Owen said calmly as the tapping stopped, "You in the bath?"

"Yeah."

"Good and hot?"

"Yes Owen for fucksake."

Ah. There is was.

"OK, Tosh and the boys are on their way over right? Tosh know what to do and when I get there we will be ready, it will all be….FUCK!"

Jack hit ice and they spun, Owen grabbing for the suicide handle as Jack roared with rage. Seems the explosion in the back must have damaged the rear brakes and Jack pumped furiously as he glanced over at Owen, Yan words still in his mind.

" _Don't forget you have a mortal beside you."_

"Owen. Brace for impact" Jack snarled as he watched the snow plough slowly lumber towards them, "We're going in hard, close your eyes to guard against the air bag dust."

"Oh Cariad" Yan sighed as she listened to the crashing metal and Owen's yells.


	52. bloody idiots

Owen was dazed, already concussed and now fighting an airbag as he yelled Jack's name but he knew there wasn't likely to be an answer, the driver's side taking a direct hit because Jack had struggled to protect Owen as best he could.

Owen finally gave up struggling and pulled out his firearm, firing into the airbag and dash until he could deflate it enough to look beside him and into the lifeless eyes of his friend. "Fuck Jack what a fucking twat!"

Owen ran his hands over him to find why he hadn't resurrected and found a large chunk of snow plough had come through the window and hit Jack in the back of the neck, severing the spinal column and with a groan of disgust Owen braced his feet against the damaged dash and yanked Jack off the pole with a sickening squelching sound.

Jacks' coms were still in and Owen could hear Yan's voice as she screamed so he hunted around on the floor for his own, jamming it in, "Sweetheart, breathe. Breathe, yeah?"

"I am fucking breathing" she snarled, "What. You think I can yell at you without air ya fucking wanker?"

OK.

"Is Tosh there yet love?"

"If he's dead just say so, you needn't handle me Owen, this is still me remember!" Yan chided and he sighed.

"Just for a wee while, we hit a snow plough on ice and he's starting to twitch now" Owen assured her, "I just gotta check the poor snow plough driver, poor fella must be fucking traumatised."

"Traumatised" Yan repeated, "you get that bastard home or I will show you traumatised Owen!"

"Yes love" Owen said softly as he slid around the damaged vehicle and peered into the snowplough cab at the pale face staring back with wide eyes. "Yep. Poor bugger thinks he just killed someone."

Owen yanked the door open, "It's OK. My friend hit his head but he is already moving. No serious injuries. Don't panic, it's OK."

The man continued to stare at Owen and then he remembered the bright blue scarf wrapped tightly around his head and he sighed, blinking as he tried to come up with a good excuse, "Fancy dress. Jack said I was a douche for using a scarf but a towel kept falling off."

The man chuckled as he relaxed and Jack fell out of Owen's door, then got to his feet and grinned disarmingly at the men, "There you are. Gods, you look stupid with that on your head, Yan is in labour aye, I'm gonna have a baby, well, she is and I am in deep shit."

"See?" Owen said to the man with a soft sigh, "His missus is in labour and he's a twat."

The man nodded and reached for his radio, "I'll call dispatch, get us moving again."

"Well you maybe" Owen turned to look at the crumpled SUV, "She's fucked for sure."

.

.

.

.

Yan alternated between panting through her contraction and thinking up ways to punish them for being so bloody stupid, even as she knew she would be so relieved to see them safe that she would forgive them on sight.

Dahlia had finally wandered up to see if she wanted a snack and was in panic mode, the Lilacs thankfully too excited to be worried as the younger one looked after the kids and the parental hovered making soft cooing noises to the unborn, coaxing it out.

Rhys and Andy had settled with the babies downstairs, the mere thought of seeing Yan naked and in pain upsetting them as they sat nervously eating the finger foods Yan had prepared for that evening's party.

Yan groaned every now and then was the storm rage outside, the house shaking with the strength of the wind.

It was dark now, only the sound of the storm and the flickering lights warning them that power might fail and Tosh had run down to the basement to prime the generator just in case, clever minx was prepared as she raced back into the room, calmly reminding Yan she had a medical degree and was just excited, not scared.

Really.

Honest.

Tosh's pretty almond eyes had blown out her face making her look like a wee bush baby as she checked Yan and pronounced her fully engaged.

"Engaged" Yan spluttered as she felt another pain, "what. Like the propulsion units on a spaceship? What, gonna propel him out and shoot him like a ping pong ball?"

Tosh giggled furiously, hiding her face at the mental image as Yan growled and started to push, "Come on ya wee bugger. Pop!"

Dahlia was confused and looked to Tosh, who was now fully laughing as Yan took a breath and pushed again, "Come on. Get Thee Gone Hence!"

"Come on" Tosh choked, "Eviction notice."

Yan took a break as the contraction eased and laughed, taking deep breaths as she felt it roll to come back, "Oh god, it's not leaving this time, shit, this is it. Come on Toshi, let's do the job."

Tosh crouched miming having a catcher's mitt and commented that she didn't have any protective eye wear for such a heavy job that had Yan laughing weakly as she bore down, her calm disintegrating as she fully gave herself to her child.

Throwing her head back, she ground her teeth and bore down, the deep guttural growl was animalistic as she expelled the head, making Tosh whoop.

"Pause" Tosh yelled, "Oh gods, Pause while I get the cord away."

"Cord?" Yan panted with horror.

"It's OK, not uncommon, let me flick it off." Tosh assured her as she slid her fingers in and found the cord was not tight.

The room lit up and bright floodlight lit the side of the house, spilling into the windows and Dahlia swung to look with shock at the large Snow Cat ploughing up their driveway, Jack's face one of total hysteria as he drove into the back of Tosh's car and then fell out into the tracks followed by Owen.

"Oh" Dahlia said with a sigh of relief, "The boys are back."


	53. Not calling him that!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://postimages.org/)

Jack was holding Yan, his eyes wide as Owen crouched by Tosh and looked at the progress and then grinned. They had run like maniacs as Yan panted and now she was done with the whole thing.

"If I pause any more I will fucking stop" Yan panted and Jack leaned in to kiss her, "You are dripping on me, if you fucking get snow in this bed I will fucking rip your head off."

Jack shrugged off the coat with a grin and Tosh patted Yan's knees, "Come on, last bits."

Owen looked up and grinned, "Come on. He's looking right at me, god he's alert. Hi there wee man, I'm your uncle Owen, yeah, come on. Let's get you out."

Yan took a deep breath and gripped Jack's arm, groaning as she felt like her entire bottom half was tearing away from her heart, the little boy ready to let go and become.

Tosh whooped as she caught him and Owen started to cry as he looked it the perfect little boy. Jack moving down to cut the cord as his mother raced forward with a heated towel to wrap him but Jack seized him and yanked him up the bed to Yan's chest knowing she didn't care about the muck, she wanted her boy by her heart once more.

"Oh Jack, he has your chin" she wept with joy as she examined the little boy, "Oh, your nose too. Oh look, he has Byrd's little folded ear too!"

"ahhhhhh" Jack gushed as he looked at a perfect little version of himself down to the chin and reached out to stroke a round cheek, "Perfect darling, oh he's a perfect one."

Yan lay in his arms sobbing with relief as Tosh and Owen cleaned her up and removed the afterbirth, Dahlia racing downstairs to tell them her grandson was here and soon the cheering was wafting up the stairs as they celebrated, Rhys lifting Dahlia off the ground as he kissed her and danced about.

Such a lovely boy.

Upstairs Yan was fading, the effort had tired her and now the shock was wearing off she wanted to rest. Jack helped Yan feed the baby and wrapped the blankets around them both, just a nappy between them as he struggled to get his own clothes off and join the skin fest.

"Perfect" Yan sighed, "Oh Jack. Look, he's looking at you."

Jack climbed in and looked at the wee face, the dark blue eyes of his father stared at him and he felt himself starting to tear, gulping down his joy as he saw the bloodline so strong.

"Hello Frankie" he whispered, "You are so lovely. Look at you."

"Frankie?"

"My Dad was Franklin" Jack said happily, "I was thinking Franklin Ifan Harkness-Jones."

"Why would I want my father tainting this little star" Yan snorted, "No. It's Franklin Owen thank you."

Owen popped his head up to stare at Yan with shock, "really? Me?"

"You are my brother, of course I want your name on him" she smiled, then a noise had her looking to the door where Gray was peeking around the frame with Byrd clutching his hand.

"Come on" Jack said with glee, "Come meet Frankie!"

"No, not Frankie" Yan said softly, "I had a dog called that, a real snarly thing with teeth like a wee weevil. No. Lin. Yeah? A boy can be a Lin, right?"

Gray rushed to the bed and leaned over, puling at the blankets and he stalled, only his eyes moving as he examined every minute detail of the little one, his mouth slowly twitching into a smile.

"What do you think Uncle Gray?" Yan asked, "Someone new to protect, teach and play with. He is going to love you so much."

"He's snotty" Byrd said as she looked at the mucus still in the baby's hair, "Why is he a giant snot?"

Yan blinked and turned to stare at her with confusion as Jack started to glare opening his mouth to chastise but Owen roared with laughter, "Yeah. He is a snot. He's our snot. Yeah, gonna be my little snot monster, yeah. You and me are gonna rule the world little man, just you wait. Uncle Owen has your back."

Byrd settled against Jack's back, leaning on his hip to look at the baby again, watching Jack carefully wiping his head to reveal….yeah. Little wafts of blondish hair.

"Ahhh, look Byrdie. He had Daddy's chin, Taddy's fingers and your hair" Jack crooned.

"But I like my hair and mine isn't full of snot!" she scoffed, then leaned in and little blue pools rolled to look back, making her grunt.

"He'll do I guess" she said as she flopped onto Jack's pillow, "A bit small but I guess we can feed him up, yeah?"

Jack laughed softly as Yan smiled and turned to look at Owen once more, seeing his joy for them.

"My kids are gonna be your friend, we are all one big family and it's gonna be grand" Owen gushed, "You wait Linny, it's going to be great."

"Owen?" Yan asked softly and he looked up at her, his face full of wonder.

"Yah sweetheart?"

"Why is Jack's expensive cashmere scarf covered in blood and wrapped around your head like a fucking turban?"

The baby chose that moment to make a small mewling sound and everyone was transfixed again.

Owen knew then that this one would be his minion, his confidant and fellow trickster.

Already watching his back for him!

Downstairs the dog watched the humans all race up for a look at the new pup and then he wandered over to sample the food on the coffee table.

Hmmm.

Not bad, not bad at all.

Luck was in the house as everyone was happy in that moment.

Even the dog.


	54. well, sort of quiet time

Yan was sleeping, so deeply asleep that Jack was able to pull her further into the bed without her even stirring.

"Is she OK?" Jack asked Owen with worry and he looked over, still packing up his stuff.

"Look at this wee one your mother is passing about like pass the parcel, this was hard work" Owen said softly, "She's buggered mate. This storm isn't letting up and we are all settling in here. Let her sleep. You know, the Doctor said no shifting for a while, tank gods there was one but I think that and the birth has done her in. Batteries depleted. Ya know?"

Jack nodded to show that he understood and settled to watch her sleep, her face slack as she snored gently, so tired. So damned tired.

Owen was right, she had given everything.

He was startled awake by his mother's gentle hand stroking his face and she offered him a plate of food but he could see Yan still resting so he shook his head, wanting to eat with her. He could hear the party downstairs, everyone revelling as Christmas rolled in and he smiled, knowing the greatest gift was currently asleep in his arms, and his daughter snuggled in the bed with Gray, his side taken as Yan slumbered on her side.

Owen came back in and to Jack's surprise he settled on the foot of the bed and closed his eyes, looking like Lucky. Why he wasn't in the bed downstairs with Tosh was a mystery and then Owen muttered softly, "How was I supposed to know the brakes on a snow plough need more response time."

Tosh's car. Shit.

"We'll take her car shopping in the New Year let her pick whatever she likes" Jack assured his friend, "or we'll let the girls go shop together. Something large enough for the car seats in the back, but still makes her feel sexy. Yan will help her there.

"Yeah" Owen nodded as he accepted the blanket Jack was throwing over him, "Love this big bastard of a bed."

"Me too" Jack smiled, then looked at Yan to find her awake watching him, her soft smile needing a kiss and he lifted the blankets for him, letting him slide in her side with the baby between them.

Jack didn't sleep and was content to watch her sleep, her lashes fluttering against her cheeks. She was beautiful. Owen left and returned with a bottle during the night as Yan slept on.

Jack watched the light sneak around the curtains as dawn broke and he realised the storm was easing so he slid from the bed and carried his son over to the change table in the corner of the room, changing and dressing him as he looked at his wee fingers and toes, then returned to the bed as Yan sighed and shifted seeking his warmth.

"I'm here love" he said as he slid back in and gently undid her nightgown so their son could suckle.

"Oh, that feels good" she sighed, "So full. Did I miss a feed?"

"Owen was on it" Jack assured her, "And he's happy now, look at him go. So strong."

"The wind has died down" Yan said after a while, "Think it's over?"

"It's just a lull" Owen muttered as he stretched and Yan blinked with surprise as she watched Owen get off the bed and walk to the window scratching his crotch and yawning.

Shit" Owen snorted "Even the snow plough is almost covered!"

"What?" Jack clambered from the bed and raced to the window to peer out with Owen at the winter wonderland below, the snow so deep Tosh's smashed car was totally gone, the plough covered over the tracks.

"Wow" Jack said, then snorted as Andy raced out and flopped in the snow, Rhys walking out to yell at him then fall to make snow angels as well. From their vantage point it looked like children playing, not grown men.

"Fuck, I'm gonna play in the snow before the storm blows back in" Owen muttered, walking off and Yan smiled softly as she shook the kids awake.

"Quick" she whispered, "Go get dressed, the snow is here."

Jack helped them dress and he led them outside where everyone else was playing in the snow, snowballs being made for a battle and laughter filling the air.

Jack looked up at the window and wanted to go back up but Yan had insisted he go have fun, his love for the snow no secret and he hoped she was sleeping again.

Soon he would take her up some porridge and then carry her down for the gifts.

He knew his mother was overly excited about that aspect of Christmas and he hoped she hadn't gone too overboard.

Although, truth be known…he was excited too.


	55. Christmas is here

Yan was standing in the bathroom staring at her naked body in the mirror as she listened to the screaming filtering up though the floorboards. The Yan wardrobe was still up here, not downstairs and she was glad of the elevator.

Christmas morning and she knew that they were waiting for her to come down and start the fun. But look at her. Her boobs were huge, her stomach was still fat and she felt…flappy.

Globby.

Blah.

She sighed and ran her hands over herself, knowing they were waiting impatiently and she was lucky she had healed quicker than normal women would without her special abilities. The urge to shift was strong but she knew it might threaten her milk so for now she had to accept she was a frumpy, blobbly mess.

The slacks were comfortable and the Ugly Christmas Sweater was white and flouncy, with Santa peeking over the waistband with Rudolf as if asking everyone to forgive the frumpiness. Well, that was her take on it.

She walked down and saw Owen's for the first time, stalling out as she stared at the plain white sweater with 'F*uck Christmas' on it. The U was Santa standing in the words. She almost made a comment but right now, it seemed to fit her mood.

Jack had a green jersey on with reindeer in a threesome…don't ask…Mama had gone overboard with a holly and Xmas light themed one and at least the others seemed to find traditional ones.

If not for the fact Jack LOVES Christmas she would have begged off, so damned tired but she settled in the huge chair then accepted the baby, looking down at her sleeping tot. His little elf outfit must have taken Mama most of the night to whip up, unless it was for one of the cats stalking around angrily in their own attire and she had just altered it.

"Mama, you don't think they will get too hot in their wee jumpers?" she asked with a grimace and Dahlia laughed as she flapped her hands.

"It's Christmas, I couldn't possibly leave them out!" she gushed and Yan shrugged, too tired to care if they cooked one of the damned cats for the feast, really she didn't give a toss.

"You OK Love?" Jack asked softly, "I can take you back to bed if ya like, I never thought about your clothes all being upstairs, I should have brought some down to the room for you."

"It's OK" she smiled as she accepted a kiss, "I'm gonna get comfortable here, if you can pass a rug."

"OOOOOOOOOO!" Dahlia was like an alarm gong off and everyone jumped as she rushed for the gifts, pulling out one and rushing back to present it to Yan who carefully opened it to find a large mermaid tail.

[](https://postimages.org/)

"I saw the pattern and thought if you" Dahlia gushed, "Look, it keeps you warm and you look so sweet, like a wee fishy. I made you several, you like different colours and even one for Byrdie."

"Oh Dahlia" Yan sighed as she felt the soft wool, "they are soooo darling. Wow, you know…I …sorry."

Yan started to cry and Jack held her, crooning he rubbed her back, looking at his mother with worry.

"Tired" Owen said softly, "She's done in, poor chick. She loves them and is too tired to show it. Let's all have some quiet time while we watch the Byrdie and Gray open their gifts, let Yan have a rest, we can open ours after we eat later, yeah?"

"Thank you Owie" Yan muttered as she snuggled into her husband, their little boy cuddled between them as Jack beamed down at him, also nodding off in his Taddette's arms.

Poor bugger" Owen said softly as he smiled up at Tosh, "What do you say love? Let's go check that turkey."

"He's a nice boy when he wants to be" Dahlia said to the remaining room, "I think he just feels little sometimes and acts out, like Byrd."

"We all feel small sometimes" Andy agreed, "This Adulting thing is hard bloody work."

"Oh, the kitty is hungry, are you kitty?" she crooned and they all went silent as they watched her peel a banana and feed it to the wild Polecat that primly sat chewing.

[](https://postimages.org/)

"Ah, Mama." Jack said slowly, "That's not a cat."

"No, of course not" she snorted, "He's a baby one. A kitty."

"Um."

"Well, he is sort of" Rhys argued, wanting to show support to the lovely lady he also considered a Mama, "A Polecat is a type of…er…."

"Weasel" Yan muttered, "Fuck. Is it smelly?"

"Don't be silly, he had his bath and de-fleaing things" Dahlia defended, "Besides. Look, he loves it here! The snow is so cold love."

Lucky was too busy trying to work out how the hat thing worked, it had been slapped on his head and it slid over his eye again. He smelt a weird thing but no one seems worried about the demon creature in their house.

These humans do go weird when shut in for too long, maybe they all needed out run about outside and pee or something.

It always helped him tucker out.

[](https://postimages.org/)


	56. Gifts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://postimages.org/)

Yan woke to laughter and blinked as she stared at her husband and Rhys, both prancing around in…oh gods, her eyes were burning with the horror.

Knitted underwear, Dahlia had knitted boxer shorts for the men with….oh gods. Sleeves for their dicks.

Everyone watched with shock, like watching a car crash in slow motion as Jack swung his dick, slapping against Rhys who was so taken aback he slapped him, then roared with mirth as Jack landed on the sofa.

Rhys loved his hat and scarf to match though, winking as he told her they were perfect for fetching the food across the Plass and she shone with delight as he kissed her cheek and called her Mama.

"Where's Owen?" Yan asked as she sat up and looked down at her little boy, sleeping in a basket by her.

"Here!" Owen said grandly as he stalked onto the room and now the baby was awake, no way he could sleep though the screams of laughter as Owen showed his knitted onesie off, "cable knit ya know."

Yan tried to tell him to stop but each time she got her breath back she started laughing again and Owen was no help as he posed hands on hips then to her absolute glee he pulled up the hood and crouched like some weird alien super hero thing.

"Beware" he hissed, wriggling his gloved hands (matching of course) "I am cometh!"

[](https://postimages.org/)

Then Tosh walked in and Yan had just recovered her breath, only able to cover her face as she tried to hold back the peals of laughter that everyone else was giving into.

A corset and suspender belt, even the stockings were knitted and Tosh looked like a cross between a femme fatale and a knitted doll.

[](https://postimages.org/)

"Awwwww, look at us" Owen beamed as he pulled her next to him "We are sooo hot!"

Yan had hiccups now.

"No, really" Owen said as he pulled the hood off "I'm fucking melting!"

Yan flopped back and looked over at her daughter walking around in the huge hat that looked so sweet with wee ears, then she frowned, "Where's Andy?"

So…Andy walking in with thigh high knitted socks and matching shorts was maybe a bit too much, especially with the expert 'tuck', making him quite svelte as he minced over to sit on Rhys' knee.

"Christ" Rhys spluttered as he hugged him with glee.

[](https://postimages.org/) [](https://postimage.org/)

"Well, it is blue" Dahlia pointed out, "Boys wear blue. Oh darling, I should really make you a wee singlet too."

"Oh god, yes please" Rhys snorted as Andy preened.

"Oh Mama, you've outdone yourself for sure!" Ianto sniggered.

Gray looked stylish in a sweet sweater with 'Santa Baby' on it, his face shining as he handed Yan a small box, his nervousness thrumming as she opened it to find a little perfume bottle.

"Oh Gray!" she gasped, "Oh! It's lovely!"

"See?" Jack said softly, "Told you she liked pretties."

"Thank you love" Yan leaned over and Gray eagerly rushed forward to kiss her on the lips, his face red as everyone hooted.

"Leave my love alone" she scolded, "My perfect, lovely and handsome young man, look at him. Oh, Lucky, what happened!"

Yan saw the dog backing in a slow circle trying to remove the hat over his face and Jack gave a squeal as the dag backed into the tree, making it shake.

"It's OK!" Owen said, his arms out like he might catch it, "Stand back!"

"He's a lumberjack and he's OK" Andy hissed and Rhys snorted with mirth as he cuddled wee Blaine.

Of course the twins were used to the sounds of their father's madness and slept right through his shrill screaming as the tree engulfed him.

"The Blob" Rhys said calmly, "Lying in wait. In its camouflage, finally come to life as it finds a victim pre-wrapped."

Yan laughed along with the others, her fatigue making her shake as she watched them all act like bloody big kids, all so silly.

The smell of the roast was filing the house, along with the pine as Owen tried to swim out from under the tree, abusing all of them for not helping him and she leaned over to lift her baby up, looking down into his iridescent eyes and knew it was all going to be alright.

She left go of her doubts, fears and self reflection as she felt his warm bum in the crook of her arm, safe happy and loved.

Byrd laughed as she leapt onto Owen's head, screaming "Alien!"

Gray laughed and followed as Owen screamed and Lucky finally got out from under the tree to see his kids in fierce battle so he ran over to defend them, latching on and growling as he ….pulled and pulled….

_God the thing has such stretchy skin and the fur tastes horrible._

Owen roared and rolled to face the dog, making him release his butt and the dribble ran from the dog's mouth to the wool like a sail trail as the dog blinked at him with confusion.

_Had the thing swallowed him?_

"Ewwwww!" Owen roared as Dahlia rushed to get a cloth.

"See? We are all mad here" Yan whispered happily to her boy.

"Welcome to the world."


	57. food glorious food

Yan let Jack carry her like he was carrying something precious, feeling it too as she smiled up at him from his arms.

The table was set and she could have wept when she saw that Dahlia had done it exactly how she wanted, comforting to see the woman had listened to her ramblings after all and Jack settled her in a large comfortable chair, pulling his own over to show his attentiveness.

"Forget something?" Owen grinned as he held the baby and Jack looked horrified for a moment as Yan giggled. No that was nice too, to know she was still his first priority, was that selfish?

Tosh bustled through followed by Rhys and the food was soon dished, everyone settled with large plates full to bursting.

"Before we start" Jack said suddenly as he rose to his feet, "I want to say a prayer to the gods."

Everyone froze as Yan looked at him with surprise and he hung his head.

"My gods, goddesses and those in the shadows who move my existence. Thank you. For my beloved, our children our friends here with us in our family and for the gift of a long life together. Thank you for always taking interests, showing care and forgiving my wrong steps. To those who watch and who revel, weep and exist in our word if only for a moment ... a chapter at a time, thank you for letting us live. Amen."

"Amen Cariad" Yan said softly, "What a lovely prayer."

"I am so happy, so grateful that if I don't do something I may explode and that would ruin the meal" Jack shrugged then Owen cleared his throat.

"Nice. You know…Toshi and I are…well. I never thought I would have a family, especially not a big one like this and I would never change a thing" Owen said awkwardly so Yan saved him.

"We are all lucky, blessed and sometimes almost impossible to live with" she smiled, "That is the great thing about family, isn't it? Even twats are welcome here."

"Owen bristled even as he grinned at her and Byrd leaned across the table for a hot potato.

"Careful love" Dahlia crooned, "I'll sort it for you, you want butter, right?"

Byrd settled happily as she got two hot potatoes cut up, butter spread and then to her delight a scoop of sweet corn as well. She hummed as her spoon worked, her little mouth chomping.

"This is all wonderful you are all hired" Jack said grandly, "Wow. You know the leftovers tomorrow are going to be excellent too."

"We will have to see the Queen's message" Andy said as he lifted the gravy boat and poured some for Rhys and then himself, "I wonder what colour she will wear. I love her prim outfits."

"I want to hear the hymns" Tosh smiled, "Afterwards, the children sing so lovely in the abbey."

"How about we finish up here then" Jack checked the time, "We settle in the other room after a wee bit of a clear up here and then some eggnog while we watch, or mulled wine. Babe? Milkshake for you?"

"Hmmmm, yes that sounds right" Yan nodded, "Maybe the Grinch later? I want to see Gray's reaction to Jim Carrey."

"Ooooo!" Jack looked excited, "I forgot we got that one. I love him."

"What?" Gray demanded around a mouthful, "You love my Yany toe!"

"Not darling, he means like he loves sweet potato pie" Yan laughed, "Like you love chocolate pudding."

"Ah" Gray went back to his food, "Just as well."

"I promise brother, nothing compares to my mate. Nothing, ever. OK?" Jack assured his little brother and Gray smiled as he nodded, forgiving the misunderstanding.

The dog licked his chops as the last of the gravy from his bowl seemed to linger on his whiskers and he considered the conversation.

He agreed that chocolate was wonderful, even if he only ever got to lick it off the boy and seriously, nothing could compete with that turkey.

That was good eating.

He went to lay his head in the lap of the old woman, sighing softy as he rolled his one eye up at her and she rewarded him by rising the fetching him some milk to wash his meal down and then to his immense delight a second bowl with cold custard was placed down as dessert was served, the fruit salad mixed in nice too. He wasn't offered fruit by the other families and he was good this family knew he liked such things.

Byrd stopped eating to watch him lick the custard, savouring it and she looked at her spoon, trying it too.

Huh.

It does taste good that way.

Lucky was clever.


	58. Lilac happiness

Yan was humming as she cradled her little one in her arms and she watched his mouth move as he cooed back at her with delight.

So little, so new and already so aware.

"Lin, you filling your nappy?" she giggled as his little face started to turn red and little grunts agreed with her.

"There he is" Jack crooned happily as he entered with a cup of soup, "Here for Taddette, some yummy tomato soup. I'll take the beastling."

"Oh, lovely" Yan smiled as she swapped and then watched Jack croon at the little one grunting in her lap.

"Awwww, look. He's pulling faces" Jack gushed.

"Nappy" Yan answered, sipping as she watched Jack's face change.

"Really?" Jack whined.

"Yeah, sweet isn't it?" Yan gushed as she took a sip, her eyes dancing over the mug at him.

"Minx" Jack snarled with fake anger, then he grinned as he lifted the baby to the change table and fully began the extraction procedure, making noises of horror that seemed to please the wee one.

"Reminds me of plasticine" Jack muttered, "A disgusting clay. Or explosive. BOOM, what a bomb."

Yan smiled as Jack fussed on the new born, kissing toes before easing the feet back into the onesie and then Gray rushed in making noises too. Jack leaned back to let Gray in and Gray kissed the little tummy near the cord, crooning.

"It doesn't hurt him love" Jack soothed, "Honestly, it will dry up and fall off, leaving a wee belly button like we have. His is where our belly buttons come from."

Gray lifted his shirt and examined his own belly as Byrd did the same behind him.

"Byrdie" Yan called softly, "Come cuddle?"

She rushed over and clambered up, followed by Gray and soon they were all happily covered with a blanket as Jack joyously had his son all to himself.

The lilacs were in the main room with their screams of glee at the gifts and the large number of people pleased them no end, as was seeing all the babies again. Jack carried his son down and dropped him onto the nearest Lilac knowing they would swam, which they did.

He had no fear for his son, the Lilacs were enamoured with the tiny tot and they resembled a giant blob of lilac jelly with the baby in the middle like a heart. Somehow that seemed too sweet for words.

"Is she OK?" Tosh asked, "I might go up for a while."

"She's happy to be back up in our room, I didn't realise how left out she felt back in the one down here, I should have huh?"

"Jack, you did the best you could, she knows that" Tosh soothed, "That's why she never complained."

Tosh headed up to find Yan sleeping in Gray's arms, the little boy cradling her as he stroked her hair with a look of love that was so sweet that she pulled out her phone and took a picture before entering.

Byrd was looking at a photo album and Tosh sat to look with her. She pointed to people and told Byrd who they were, people long gone and not forgotten.

"One day you will have a book like this" she smiled and Byrd shook her head as she pointed to Yan's book sitting by the bed, "Oh? You want to have one like Teddette's?"

Byrd nodded happily and Tosh grinned, "I suppose you will have grand adventures and write such exciting things in there."

Byrd nodded and looked over at Gray, then she whispered, "With my mates."

"Yes, we all need mates" Tosh grinned, then she noticed that Yan had woken and was watching, snorting softly with mirth.

"What?"

"She means her partners" Yan whispered, "You know…bed mates?"

"Oh goodness, she gonna have more than one?" Tosh giggled as Byrd went back to the album.

"She will have as many as she wants" Yan said softly, "She will be loved. Know love and spread it like sunlight."

"And Lin?"

"I don't know, I've not met him yet in my timeline" Yan shrugged, "I expect he will be as troublesome as her with us as parents."

Tosh smiled as she looked lovingly at her dearest friend, "If these two grow to be anything like you and Jack then I have no fear for the future of my babies anyway."

Yan couldn't help but agree.


	59. Lilac Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://postimg.cc/image/e526hy2y7/)

Yan walked through the wardrobe with silent delight, her hands floating along the fabric of the outfits hanging there, deciding on a soft lilac to show respect for the givers of today's celebration.

The snow was melting and although they could come and go, everyone was settled in the house for Christmas, New Year so close that they had been invited to stay and today was a day for the Lilacs.

Their gifts sat on the floor with their beloveds, their look of pleasure when the offer was made to have their party here enough to let Yan know today's celebration was the correct thing to do, to show them some form of special day for what they had done in providing the means for her daughter's future happiness.

Gray entered, pulling at his tie and she knelt, gushing slightly as he looked so dapper in his suit. The lilac shirt with the charcoal waistcoat and trousers looked so cute, Yan couldn't help but kiss his cheek as she whispered how handsome he was.

His grin showed his delight in her affections.

"Remember what today is" she said softly, "We must always celebrate people, no matter what their origins or preferences. Just because they don't do Christmas or believe the same things as us, it doesn't mean their beliefs are any less important or real to them."

Gray nodded solemnly.

"The babies will know where they come from and this will be important to them too, even if they are our babies, they come from Lilacs and so they have a right to celebrate the Lilac Day." She smiled, pulling him in for a cuddle, "Now, wanna go wrestle that mad thing down stairs? I can hear her still in her room."

Gray kissed her gently then raced to tag Byrd knowing she would chase him and they bellowed as they thundered down the stairs instead of using the lift, that waited for Yan who wafted to it happily.

The smell of food was alluring and she went to the kitchen where Dahlia was excitedly icing little cupcakes….yeah…lilac flowers. It had been easier than she thought to talk Dahlia out of throwing lavender into the casserole and the purple cauliflower was enough to please her. Yan sat and helped, also placing little leaves.

Yan then rose and walked into the main room where the Lilacs were proudly watching all the babies, their latest blobs there on the mat with the others and when they saw Yan they lit up with delight in her choice of colour, further enforcing that she had chosen right.

"wow" Jack sighed softly as she turned towards him, her body now taught and toned once more as the nanites worked their magic. Jack wanted to plaster himself against her but knew it had to be her that made the first move, her right to chose when to resume hanky panky. After all, she had just provided him with the ultimate gift of love, his wee sporgglet laying there happily staring at a stuffed giraffe. Seemed the boy was partial to animals and Jack remembered Ianto asking for animal pretties, maybe this was a sign?

Their son might be a zoologist or something? Or a Xoologist? Why not be an alien expert?

Jack turned his attention to the front where the Lilacs were putting on a light display of sorts, like squid they were lighting up and undulating, their pretty bodies showing their delight as they celebrated their traditional time of family.

It was lovely to watch and as Yan slid around the room to step into his hip, her arm snaking around his waist, he realised this was the happiest he had ever been.

"Thank you" he whispered and Yan looked at him with surprise.

"For what Cariad?"

"For making me whole" he said simply, not needing to say anymore as the Lilacs moved into some sort of song that had all the babies transfixed, their wee mouths open and eyes wide as they watched and listened, sweet little Lin engrossed as well with his wee fingers wriggling as if conducting them.

"A fellow artiste" Jack pointed as their son showed delight with some little leg kicking.

"I think he will be the gentle one, the one with feels. His sister there will be balls to the wall madness while he calmly apologises and tried to tidy after her." Yan sighed.

"So she is me and he is you?" Jack asked, then laughed softly. "Yeah, makes sense."

"Oh, she has a little me in her too" Yan said as she moved away to help Dahlia with the food.

Jack frowned as he wondered what that was supposed to mean, then decided it was not a bad thing if Byrd had her Taddette's brains, after all his had gotten him killed enough times and she was so…so…precious.

Byrd looked over at him as if hearing and she smiled, that special Harkness smile that always made him go gooey, her hair extra curly today like a halo.

His changeling.

[](https://postimages.org/)


	60. lift me up

Ianto walked from the bathroom in his altogethers, Jack looking up in time to see that lovely dick flop past as Ianto muttered to himself.

"Come on love" Jack said softly, "You know you are quicker with the numbers and Tosh would come but Hero has his wee tummy bug thing."

"I know" Ianto huffed, looking forlornly at his dresses as he fingered a silk shirt.

"Hey" Jack was right behind him, pulling him back into his arms, "You know I've missed this chest hair?"

"Really?" Ianto deadpanned, "I'm sure I could manage something as Yan ya know."

"Ouch" Jack pouted, "Baby. You are getting too comfortable as her, you know you can't get too settled or it might affect changing later."

"I know, I just….she is so….so…alive" Ianto sighed, "She lights up a room I wraith around in as him."

"If it's any consolation, I like being the one to light up a room too" Jack said as he pulled Ianto back again, "As Ianto you complete me, as Yan I complete you. I love you. You. Her, him, tentacled hir. I love you. Right now I need Ianto by my side so I can shine, he can wraith."

Jack kissed his cheek and Ianto sighed as he knew Jack was telling the truth. After all, it was Ianto who had first turned his head, right?

And really, he had missed shooting his cuffs and raising that eyebrow as Jack sniggered softly.

OK, Jack was right. He had missed Yan so much he was lingering. Lin was happy with his Hearthwarmer now and the Lilacs were smitten too, already downstairs again with their own little blobs having a play date. Apparently the idea was new and exciting for them, sitting with Dahlia complaining about stains in table cloths.

They even tried some knitting again, liking the little rugs on the sofas and Ianto and Jack wandered past getting chirps and whistles.

Ianto swung and did a slow turn so they could see the dark purple lining of the charcoal jacket and they cooed with delight, wanting to touch so he moved closer for them. They didn't see him as him, or Yan. Their kind are non gender specific and they naturally accepted Ianto/Yan as normal.

Right, onto the meeting.

Unit rose as they entered and Ianto wraithed behind his husband as always, slightly miffed when his chair wasn't pulled out and then Jack turned with a look of confusion and he remembered he was Ianto once more, his grin letting Jack know the problem and Jack laughed softly as he waited politely for Ianto to sit, shaking his head at the silliness of it all.

The meeting was underway and twice Ianto politely corrected the General while an aide simpered behind him then came the same said aide moving behind him and muttering about bum kissers.

It happened so fast.

One moment Ianto was sitting there all prim and proper and next thing ya know he was standing with his blade under the little fuck's chin calmly asking him to repeat himself a little louder please so everyone could share his thoughts on bum kissing.

"Ianto, love?" Jack said softly as Ianto canted his head.

"Yes sir?"

"Stand down please"

"Sir" Ianto let the blade move and sank back into his chair with silent shock at what he had just done. Him. Ianto.

"It seems your men keep upsetting my husband" Jack said calmly, "I wish we could all get along but seriously, can they not keep their mouths shut for half an hour without some homophobic remark?"

"Captain, we have the 'don't ask don't tell'…."

"I'm omnisexual" Jack smiled, "I fuck men, women, anything else. Tried a Retillopos once but then…well. I was young then and didn't understand the whole third leg thing ….heh…heh. Fun times. I'm just a one man kinda guy these days."

"I am a one man kinda man too" Ianto said calmly, "Have had women but..well. Once you've gone Jack you never go back."

Jack found he was enjoying this new Ianto and he leaned back to let him go, let's see where he goes with this.

"General we don't have time for these games and if you are not willing to hand over the artefact you team snavelled from the crash site you were guarding for us then this will get difficult for us, you know…to trust you with other security matters" Ianto rose and Jack started, then rose as well, "Good day gentlemen, I hope you realise that this will have to go in my full reports. Come sir, you wanted an afternoon massage I believe?"

"Oh, yes please" Jack said happily, "Goodbye gentlemen."

"And the Vernish in the corner, goodbye to you too" Ianto called out and they all turned to stare at the potted palm with horror.

"Vernish?" Jack asked in the elevator, "What the hell is a Vernish?"

"Dunno, sounds good though" Ianto snorted, liking this new him too.

The two men giggled softly as they stood together watching the lights flick down the numbers.

"Ianto?"

"Hmm?"

"So fucking hot in that three piece love."

"Hmmm. Sir?"

"Yeah Ianto?"

"There's a brake button see?"

"Yeah. Red."

"I like red."

"Heh heh, me too."

The sound of the alarms had people turning and the phone rang on the wall of the elevator as Ianto leaned back and clung to anything he could, Jack's mouth so sassy today as he gave Ianto a blowjob that really pushed home how pleased Jack was with his performance.

Was a good day all told.

Apart for that poor potted plant that was now in a containment box under armed guard.

Jack blowed wonderfully as Ianto grinned at the irony, Unit were the real suckers.

The piece of tech was useless anyway.

Had been a fun snipe hunt to set up though.


	61. Furbies

They were travelling back when Owen contacted them, a problem at the docks and they swung that way as Ianto pulled out his gun from under the seat and checked the clip. Jack was grinning gleefully as they shot down the loading ramp and then his smile faded as they entered hell.

Bodies were scattered around like props from some horror movie then the SUV rolled to a halt as something scuttled past and Ianto straining in his belt to look, "Jack? Was that…."

"Shit" Jack huffed, "They looked like Furbies."

"Killer Furbies" Ianto muttered as he opened the door and thanked the gods he wasn't in heels and a fucking dress.

They both headed for the noise, the screaming that was the only indicator that there still people alive. They shot any fur balls they saw rolling past and as they neared the survivors Ianto felt a cold dread. Ahead of them was a body laying face down, just one leg twitching where a fluff ball was chewing on it. He knew that jacket, he had purchased it not two Christmases ago and he slowed to shoot two furbie things making the others scatter, and then turned the body to check if there was any hope.

Johnny Davies was definitely dead.

Jack hadn't realised the problem and kept shooting, glancing back in time to see his beloved storming back to the SUV and opening the back. Jack let his arms flop and he stood watching with awe as Ianto came around the side of the SUV with a semi-automatic slapping in the clip, then flicking off the safety as he walked that slow graceful glide. He had the rifle at his hip and he swung it without a care, a spray of bullets passing close enough for Jack to feel the wind whistling and he turned to find a Furby still suspended in the air as it was thrown back. It had been leaping for Jack and he hadn't even seen it.

"Thanks love" Jack called out energetically firing again as Ianto deshouldered another rifle and threw it to him with an expert hand, now both men clearing the decks with their high powered gin fire.

"Well, this is a fun date" Jack quipped.

"That's Rhia's feckless husband back there by the barrels" Ianto replied emotionlessly as he unclipped and slapped in a fresh one, swinging behind them.

"Ah shit" Jack sighed as he turned as well and they found themselves in a place of silence.

Then a single barrel rolled past.

"Um…done?"

"Yep" Jack agreed, "Andy, tell the red caps it's clear and they can come do a scoop of any left hiding under the bodies."

As they walked back to the SUV Jack knelt to look at his dead brother-in-law with disinterest, he had never liked him and couldn't for the life of him find any sorrow in his passing. Ianto appeared at his side and flapped out a body bag.

"We know they can't release the bodies, it will be a shit storm and they will blow it all up or something equally stupid as a cover story" Ianto sighed as he started to roll the boy with Jack's help, "Rhia should at least be able to bury the bastard"

Jack lifted the bag and carried it back to the SUV while Ianto walked ahead and cleared some space, the gun boxes still spilled open.

"Owen is gonna be so jealous" Jack said after a while "Come on love. Let's lock it down and get out of here, OK?"

"Excuse me, you can't move any of the…" The red cap was forced to stop talking with the barrel of a little snub nose to his forehead. The Welshman attached to it seemed unwilling to say much either as he snarled silently at the dickhead.

"Torchwood" Jack barked as if he couldn't see the standoff and he calmly slammed shut the boot and walked around to the passenger side. "You drive babe, I have to reload the Webley."

Ianto took another beat or two and then lowered the snub nose, his gaze like glacier ice and the soldier took a few tentative steps back, the expanding patch in his crotch disguisting Ianto so he screwed up his nose and turned, gracefully flicking around the vehicle and into the driver's seat where beside him Jack was indeed, loading his Webley.

They roared back up the ramp at the same break neck speed as their entrance and Ianto didn't even blink as they smashed through the barriers the Red Caps had just erected, Jack starting to laugh as he looked back out the window and yelled back, "Sorry"

"Fuckers knew we were coming, they had time to move it" Ianto said calmly.

"Yes dear" Jack agreed, putting his gun away and settling back to consider things, "That was a large infestation, Tosh will need to track the boat's origins. Those wee fuckers came from somewhere."

"Let Unit do it Cariad" Ianto was a lot calmer now, "They complain about not having enough to do…let them hunt them."

"Point, fair point" Jack said as he closed his eyes and let his head fall back.

After they had unloaded and changed into clean clothes they had another stop to make and it was not gonna be nice.

Not nice at all.


	62. Rhiannon's Reaction

"Ianto?" Rhia was standing at the front door with a look of open confusion, "My god, what are you doing up and about, you just had a…"

She glanced about and then hissed, "baby!"

Ianto pushed her back into the house as she continued to speak, "We are coming at the weekend to meet him, and he's not out in the weather is he? It's too cold for a new born, mind the mess I was folding some pamphlets, the supermarket has a special on this week with meat, I need to remember to add those bloody free sample shampoos this time because they are so up my arse….what are you looking like that, don't tell me…god, fucking phone had been going while I was in the loo, I better get it."

"Rhia please could you just…" Ianto sighed as she turned away to answer the phone.

"Annie? What the hell girl, Ianto had just walked in with that fella of his and…what? What are you talking about, what channel?" Rhia rushed to grab the TV remote as Ianto sighed and the TV sprang to life with a live shot of the docks…or what was left of them. Rhiannon dropped the phone and slowly sank onto the couch with confusion.

Ianto pulled the remote from her hand and turned the TV off, then sat on the coffee table so he was eye level with her, "Rhiannon, you need to shut up and listen to me."

She nodded with wide eyes.

"Today there was an incident at the docks, a lot of people died and Johnny….Johnny was one of them" Ianto swallowed as she took a shuddering breath, "We pulled some strings to get his body released to us but apparently most bodies were not as they were in the explosion. It's going to be OK. Jack and I will take care of you and the kids, we will get through this and you will survive. OK?"

"He's really dead" she said flatly.

"Yes."

"Thank fuck for that" she slumped and Jack snorted with surprise more than mirth.

"I beg your pardon?" Ianto asked softly, "Rhia?"

"I've been trying to leave him for years" she said with her eyes closed, "He keeps catching me before I do. I had a secret bank account, he found it. I had bags packed and hidden in a closet, he found them. Each time worse than the last. God Ianto, I married our father."

"No" Ianto said softly his horror making Jack move to hold him as he pushed some pamphlets and sample sachets to the floor, both men on the table now and Ianto looked down "Think this will hold both of us Cariad?"

"Baby, your sister is in shock I don't think us rutting on the table in front of her will help" Jack scolded, then leaned forward to hold a hand as she looked at him and started to snigger as Ianto's head swivelled to give him the 'look' that was so much like their mother's while Jack pretended not to see the glare of doom as he continued to speak, "Rhia, we will bury him and move on. OK?"

"You have amazing eyes" she told him seriously and he grinned at her.

"Where are the kids?" Ianto asked, looking around and finally noticing they were not there.

"Next door at Henry and Gina's" Rhia answered dreamily "Johnny had a double shift so he always comes home a right bastard. The kids stay next door until he's passed out from the beers I feed him then they sneak home to their beds."

"Shit" Jack said suddenly and Ianto realised he was listening to his coms, patting his ear to respond, "How long before they have the list Tosh? Shit, trust Unit to release a list of the dead, want to clean a few more bodies I guess. Bastards. Thanks for the heads up."

"Press?"

"Yeah babe, seems the idiots released the names and not all next of kin have been told, the media scrums on their front lawns are their first indicator that their loved one is gone" Jack growled angrily.

"Oh gods, then they will be here soon, Cariad the SUV is the Torchwood one with the name on the bodywork" Ianto sighed, "They will work out in five seconds flat that Rhia is my sister and then it's a bum fight."

"Right, Rhiannon and I will pack some bags for her and the kids while you go next door and collect them. They can come home for now and we will work it out from there, OK?" Jack said as he rose to finish the conversation and Ianto rose as well, automatically moving towards the back door.

"What?" Rhiannon said softly to Jack as Ianto slipped out, "Do you have room? We don't want to be a burden."

"Stop it" Jack sighed, "You are family. Ianto will drive your SUV so you don't have to be stuck, I will follow."

"Wait" Rhiannon said as she turned to face Jack, "What did he mean, Torchwood on the bodywork?"

Well…..shit.


	63. This is the Hub ...Hub this is Rhia

The kids boggled as the SUVs slid into the underground car park and the huge cage doors closed behind them.

Jack slid out of Black Beauty and watched the bright sparkle beast slide into a park then he walked over to pull the door open with a flourish, "Welcome to Torchwood."

Ianto got out and looked at Jack with open annoyance and Jack knew it was because he had led them here instead of to the house but he felt the need to give Rhiannon some proof, her interest something that took her mind off the death of her husband.

David was looking around with wonder and Jack led them down to the elevator then into the hub where Andy looked up with surprise, "Rhiannon?"

"Andy Pandy!" she said with glee, "You bloody bastard! This why you never wanted to talk to me about the spooky-doos going on, you shit!"

"Language please" Rhys said as he walked in with a sleepy baby in his arms and Ianto lit up.

"Blaine! What is he doing here, why isn't he at the house with the others?" Ianto asked as he reached for him, expertly flipping him onto his shoulder, "Is everything OK back there?"

"Yeah, Tosh is on one of her 'kill unit' mental things and Owen is busy pissing Unit off" Rhys grinned, "Jack's Mum was happy with the twins and wee Lin but I think this little one would be a bit much with his grump"

"He's not got the same funny tum Hero has, has he?" Ianto frowned, "I wonder if it's the formula. They are Lilac made, perhaps we need to look at that."

"Hadn't thought of that" Owen said as he stomped out of Jack's office, "Could be right there. Is that ya sister? She has your eyes! Shit, look at that little girl, she looks like Byrdie except without that eager look of destruction."

"My daughter does not look like that!" Jack snarled, "She's a fucking angel!"

"More like a bloody devil" Owen snorted, "Wow. What's happening bud?"

"Rhia and the kids are coming home with us so I need to know if you can hold things down here" Jack said and Owen nodded.

"Yeah, cool. Told ya to bugger off home after the meeting" Owen snarked, "If those furry shits didn't turn up you would be there already. Yeah, yeah I know Rhys, I cursed in front of your boy. Piss fuck and balls. Get used to it kid, mine have."

"Owen" Ianto warned softly and Owen grunted as he looked sideways at him, then the kids.

"Right, fair enough. Didn't see those were still here. Sorry Yan" Owen said as he moved away.

"I will forgive you" Ianto said imperiously, "Since you are the only one to fit in the furnace for cleaning it."

Owen cackled softly as he sat at his workstation, amused as always by his bad buddy and his quick tongue.

"I'm swapping SUVs for a plain one and we are going home" Jack informed them, "maybe a day or so to ourselves while we process, yeah?"

"Oi!" Owen's head popped up, "What about the New Year feast damn it!"

"Still on for Saturday" Ianto assured him, "I'm just talking a day or so Owen. Promise, I have the fruit soaking for the pudding, OK?"

Owen nodded smacking his lips as he looked back at his screen.

"Mama's recipe?" Rhiannon asked and Ianto nodded.

"Right, let's get these kids home and fed" Ianto said, "Gray also needs to be talked to so he doesn't try to stab one or something."

"Shit, the kids" Jack agreed, "Byrd will be more interested than anything but Gray might be a bit jealous."

"Either that or protective" Ianto agreed and Rhiannon remembered the boy with the knife.

"He's not dangerous, right?"Rhiannon asked.

"No more than the rest of us" Ianto quipped as he removed his gun she hadn't even noticed and replaced it with another, Owen accepting the used one with disinterest.

"We are going to talk about this!" Rhiannon said with sudden anger, "You and me. You hear me Ianto Blaidd Jones!"

Jack swung to look at her, "Ianto has a middle name? Babe? You said you didn't have one…wait, I've heard that word before. Where have I heard that word?"

"Wolf" Ianto said with a sigh.

"Hah!" Jack pointed at him "Wolf! Holy shit, she really is everywhere"

"Stop it" Ianto hissed, "You are making more questions arise."

"Grrrr" Jack growled as he agreed and smiled at the kids, "Come on little pirates. To the life boats!"

The kids gleefully ran for the SUVs, still unaware their father was dead and Ianto sighed as he saw that job would likely fall to him as well and he followed them with Rhiannon holding his hand.

"Is he always so….childlike?" she asked softly.

"I prefect the word 'numpty' but that will do" Ianto muttered and she smiled as she saw her lovely brother was happy with his fella, his eyes twinkling with merriment even as he pretended to be annoyed.

"Hurry up love" Jack roared ,"We're hungry!"

She smiled wider and she watched as Ianto quickened his pace, the need to feed strong.


	64. No Maiming Family

The Lilacs were excited to meet the kids who were frozen to the spot with shock as the large purple blobs slithered around them and Ianto walked though the room calling out distractedly, "These are my sister's kids, don't smother them. Kids they're the Lilacs, don't poke them with anything sharp."

Ianto was going through papers on the coffee table and a small Lilac rushed over to engulf his foot and he looked down then laughed softly, "Ewain, my shoe is not sanitary young man."

They watched him scoop up the jelly thing and rub his face into it making it change colours and go all sparkly before he placed it back down and it slithered over to one of the little sleeping babies and attached itself to a pudgy little arm.

"Right, those two are the twins Hero and Kitty. That tiny one there is mine and your uncle's new son Lin." Jack said proudly to them, "See? He has Ianto's nose."

The kids finally found their feet and moved over to croon excitedly as they realised they were not in any danger from these weird things, "Uncle Jack, what are they?"

"Told you" Ianto answered as he found a notebook and flourished it at Jack, "They are Lilacs."

"Aliens" Jack hissed at them, "From a planet 50 krells that way!"

The kids stared at him silently.

"Ianto and I work for a secret government agency called Torchwood, see?" Jack flipped open his wallet so they could see his badge and they both leaned in with their eyes totally bugging out now, "We hunt aliens. Not all are bad though; some are our friends and live here peacefully. All around us here in this wee cul-de-sac, full of aliens. They will all want to say hi ya know, they love your Uncle Ianto and any family of his will be so exciting to them."

"Wow" David said softly, "That is so cool."

Ianto re-entered the room and sat, "She's looking thorough the pamphlets."

"That your funeral book?" Jack asked and Ianto nodded, the book he had full of funeral directors that would provide bodies or dispose of them with no questions asked. Best keep it in the family, this whole Johnny business.

"Right, kids" Ianto sighed as he steadied himself, "Something bad happened today and that's why you are here."

"We finally escaped" David said with a knowledgeable look to his sister, "We ran away and Dad can't find us here."

Ianto swallowed and took another breath, "Today there was an accident on the docks and your Dad was hurt."

"Is he dead?" David asked blandly, "Coz Mum is here too, not at the hospital, so he's dead right?"

"Yes" Jack answered as he watched Ianto struggle.

"Good" Micha whispered as she wrung her little hands, "Good."

Ianto looked at her and slid from the sofa to pull her into his arms, kissing her little face as he whispered that no-one was ever going to hurt her again and if anyone tried he would kill them.

"Did you kill Dad for us?" she asked.

"No darling, but I would like to have" he assured her and she relaxed in his arms as David looked at the babies again.

"Are they Asian?"

"They are mine" Byrd said as she stomped in and sat with her pack, "They are family."

"That dog only has one eye" David blurted as Lucky rolled it at him and Ianto saw how much like his father he was, also how much work it would take to make him a better person. He could though, teach him.

"David, Lucky is a rescue dog from the pound" he said softly, "There are a heap of cats out back on the lawn if you go look. This time of day they catch the last of the sun on the low concrete wall in the garden."

David's face lit up as he rushed for the back door calling back that he loved kitties and Ianto saw a little of himself then, Jack did too and he smiled as he watched Micha run after her brother yelling for him to slow down.

"A lot of changes" Jack said to Byrd who had watched silently, "You both need to be a bit caring, OK?"

Gray's head appeared from under Ianto's large chair and he glared at his brother, "Big mouth that fat one."

"I know, he is used to talking big" Jack agreed, "They will sleep down here in the room Ianto had, OK? Tomorrow we will sort another room down here so Rhia can have that room to herself and they can share one. We will remember that they are family and we will not cut them or anything, OK?"

"Can I burn one?" Gray's voice was muffled under the chair and Ianto started to giggle as Jack yelled no.

"Just a thump? What if I step on a foot?"

"Gray, behave yourself young man" Ianto giggled, "You are not too big for my knee!"

The snort of amusement told them he was not the least bit afraid and Rhiannon walked in to find a seat, "What are you laughing about?"

"Gray wants to know if he can stomp on David's foot as it is not technically maiming." Jack sniggered "So specific a choice of attack."

"David is sad and doesn't know how to deal with it because he is happy too" Ianto said softly, "remember how weird that feels?"

"Yah"

"I love you Cariad" he said softly to the chair.

"Love my Taddette" came the reply and Ianto smiled fondly as Byrd rose to point to a baby, declaring it stinky.

"Oh, let me" Rhia said as Dahlia stopped rushing towards them, "Lovely wee mite, aren't ya."

Ianto realised the other one about to have feathers ruffled as Dahlia watched Rhiannon change her nephew's nappy expertly.

Fun times ahead, eh?

Ianto let his head fall back as he wondered if they would survive the Davies brood under the same roof.


	65. beds

Lin had woken and was currently smashed in his Aunt's boob with a look of sheer bliss.

"She can have that one" Byrd said with a sniff as she patted her little loves sleeping around her. Gray climbed out to look at her and then he remembered she was from the Mall and he smiled, showing that Harkness Grin that had him pressed to the other boob as Rhiannon crooned that he was adorable too.

Byrd frowned as she considered if this was treachery or not, then decided Gray was big enough to fight his own battles going back to sing to her Kitty.

The funeral director was delighted to have an actual funeral to officiate for a change and when they learnt it was Ianto's brother-in-law they promised it would be tasteful and simple as requested but Ianto knew they would get the best service.

The kids were hungry, Ianto could see that even though they didn't complain and he wondered with a heavy heart how often they had accepted this as normal, turning to Dahlia as he decided those days were over for sure.

"Hearthwarmer, the children might be peckish" he said softly as he watched her face light up, "They do not have their own Hearthwarmer as their father was alone as well. My sister's children must have a Hearthwarmer and I believe you should take that honour as you have served my children so well."

Dahlia swallowed back tears of joy as she looked at the two little ones, needing love and her so willing to give.

"Come on darlings, come help me make some num nums" she gushed, "I bet you would like milkshakes too, do you like chocolate like your lovely uncle?"

She ushered the children out and Ianto settled to watch Rhiannon as she unfolded the baby from her breast to look at again with wonder. "You forget how small they are."

"He was definitely a wee one" Ianto agreed happily as Gray finally escaped after the other children and Byrd watched before sliding to the edge of her seat.

"Taddette, could you please mind my babies?" she asked as she found her feet and wandered off in case there were good treats on offer.

"Such a funny one" Rhia smiled, "She called you Taddette?"

"Yeah, a mummy Taddy" Ianto smiled as he watched his sister giggle. "You OK Rhi-Rhi?"

"Oh Ianto" she sighed as she laid the sleeping baby with the others and sat looking at their adorable little selves, "I don't know if I should laugh, cry or fart."

So Rhiannon.

Ianto snorted and then looked up towards the ceiling, the floor above and the dresses.

"Rhiannon, we are Torchwood" He began and she waved her hand as she rose to dismiss him.

"I don't wanna know" she said flatly, "I am still angry with you and your secrets but I know you have reason for them. Just…nothing else right now eh? I don't think I can take any more surprises."

"Right, you'll want to settle. Tomorrow we burry him and then on to the New Year Feast the next day. Gods, what a week." Ianto grumbled as he rose, "I'll show you to the room, it was mine once I was too fat and waddlish. The bed is huge so you can all share tonight, maybe the kids would like that and tomorrow I will do out the boy's room for them. They won't mind."

"The boys?" she asked.

"Andy and Rhys" Ianto answered as he stepped aside for her to enter his baby bump room. "They are a couple, have that wee bubba back at the hub. Why they won't mind, they only stay once in a blue moon and for the New Years dinner they can sleep on the pull out. They will both get sozzled knowing Mama will mind their spawn."

"You called her Hearthwarmer?" Rhiannon asked.

"Jack is from another place, there the mother lives with the oldest child and helps rear their young, then when too old she is cared for by her child. She is called a Hearthwarmer because traditionally they live in a small cabin-like shack and she slept by the hearth to keep the fires going in the night for the babies to be warm."

"Where is he from then?" Rhiannon snorted, "Alaska?"

"A little planet called Boeshane" Ianto answered absently as he pulled out a couple of his dresses that were in the rack and left the big pink bathrobe there he hadn't liked anyway, "Jack is an alien too. Ah, slippers to match the robe, knew I had them somewhere."

"You know…" Rhiannon sat on the huge king-size bed and grinned at him, "You are such a bullshit artist, always were. I can never tell when you are having me on. Guess why you were right for this job."

"Yep" Ianto smiled softly, "That and I know my way around the Dewey decimal system better than the trolls I loosely call teammates. Jack needed an archivist, I fitted the bill. Love came later, surprisingly, painfully, angrily later."

"He does love you" she smiled, "He watches you move like you are a dancer enticing him."

"Well, he does accuse me of that" Ianto agreed with a soft snort, "Cheeky bugger."

"At least one of us chose well" she sighed.

"Oh he wasn't me first choice, Lisa was remember?" Ianto asked, "Jack was my final one. Big difference, just like he may have been your first but you will find another, someone who loves and cherishes you. He will be your last."

"I hope so" she nodded sadly as she flopped back on the bed.

Ianto went back to emptying the drawers as he thought to himself that the next one will have a gun shoved up his nose for a wee interrogation before he even gets to first base and if he proves to be a twat he will not even remember who gave him a beating.

Ianto smiled lovingly at his sister.

Yes.

A good bloody beating.


	66. planting him

They were standing by a simple grave with the coffin sitting on the planks, old fashioned and apt somehow as a lot of Jones funerals had been in the past.

The kids were clumped together forlornly shivering as the cold swirled about and Ianto wanted it over with so he could take them to McDonalds or something, reward them for being so good.

The black vans that swung up the cemetery road and around the plots were not welcome, the one that ran over the flowers placed on a fresh grave to slid to a halt was the one Ianto chose to focus in and Byrd made a small noise as she stepped towards her Gray Boy and he stepped in front of her and removed the knife from his cool ankle holster Taddette had given him.

Ianto walked calmly towards the men as they poured out with their side arms in their hands and he casually approached the one with the most arsehole aura around him then he smiled serenely as he swung. The man made a dull thud as his head hit the bonnet of the van and Rhiannon's jaw fell open as Ianto ducked a punch and his leg swept the one who had swung down, a rabbit punch to the man's larynx stopping him as Ianto popped back up and grabbed the wrist of the next fist flying past, reaching out to hook the man's trousers at the pocket and pick him up, bodily throwing him around his hip so his head left a good dent in the door Ianto snarling as he head butted the one that had seen a chance to get too close.

The gunshot stopped everyone as Jack stood with his Webley raised to the heavens, "Now, if I just killed a bird or something I will release him again."

They moved away from the Welshman who was openly growling.

"Sweetheart, come here and stop playing with them" Jack called softly, "You don't know where they've been."

"We've come for the body" the one in charge yelled through the blood from his broken nose.

"Well, my buddy has given you several to chose from, if you want a dead one he can accommodate you there too" Owen called out with glee, "Get 'im Yan!"

Ianto roared and went into a Wolverine style stance that had them stepping back even more and then they retreated leaving their leader alone and visibly shocked.

Rhiannon felt little hands on her legs and looked down to find Byrd peering around her with a look of intensity as she hugged Micha to her.

"Taddette gonna skin him alive" she hissed, her eyes seeming to glow, "Taddette gonna cut his wobbly bits off if he comes near us Mimi."

"My uncle is a badass" David said with awe as Jack swaggered over to stand by his mate.

"Well?" Jack asked calmly, "You wanna dance? My beloved is a champion. He will chew on your bones for the marrow and then fuck me against the side of that van!"

"Language Cariad" Ianto scolded.

"Yeah, sorry Sweetling" Jack smiled sweetly, then turned back to the man.

"I am going to let our child decide" Ianto said, "Byrd?"

"I want Maccas" she said calmly as she peered into the pram to check the babies were OK, all clumped together like kittens. "This is boring"

"OK" Ianto straightened up and shot his cuffs as he dismissed the men and he walked jauntily over to the pram "Lets settle the babans in their seats then shall we? Andy?"

"Yes, lets!" Andy said in a matching voice as they virtually flounced off, Rhys sniggering softly as he lowered the semi automatic Rhiannon hadn't even noticed and Owen snorted as he spoke softly down the coms to Tosh who was running the van plates back at the hub.

As the black vans sped off Owen wondered how they were going to explain all those traffic infringements and such they had suddenly garnered through the system and then he heard Tosh snigger as she said she had reported them all stolen as well.

"Bad Toshi" Owen growled, "Bad girl!"

"That's why you love me" she quipped.

"Yeah and that way you snort coffee out your nose is cute too" he sighed theatrically as he walked away.

Rhiannon watched Jack sort things in the SUVs that sat side by side and then she turned to Ianto to watch him calmly hold out a hand for Owen to wipe the blood off, amazed when she saw no damage. The way he was punching she expected at least swollen knuckles if not some broken but Ianto seemed unscathed, then Owen said it.

"One had a knife?" Owen sighed, "How deep did it go?"

Until it hit my pelvis" Ianto replied as he lifted his bloody shirt and she saw pristine skin as Owen ran his hand over it, "I broke his hand and by now he's realised that pinch in the small of his back is his own blade."

"Nasty" Owen grimaced, "You are so nasty!"

"My Nasty Boy" Jack giggled as he turned and then his smile faded as he looked at Rhiannon.

"Right, I don't know what the hell is going on here but I think you have some explaining to do mister! When we get home you will spill!" she growled and Ianto nodded as he glanced at Jack.

Jack wondered if they had smelling salts at the house.


	67. Reveals

Rhiannon sat on the sofa waiting as Dahlia calmly placed cups of steaming sweet tea down and plate of food, more at the second table the children were all sitting on the floor at.

"Right, where is he then?" she demanded as Jack entered and collapsed into a chair that was unmistakable his with the little occasional table next to it covered in magazines and tat.

Then that woman from the mall entered, her blonde hair flowing loose today instead of tied back like other times she had seen her and the pant suit looked like it was poured onto her small hips. Rhiannon felt jealously sticking in her throat as the pretty vision that looked so much like their Mama sat and looked at her silently.

"That's me brother's chair" Rhiannon finally stated and she nodded back silently.

"Taddette" Byrd demanded, "My straw isn't bendy enough!"

Yan delicately accepted the juice box and bent the straw at a jauntier angle and returned it to the smiling baby, "There you go stink pot, remember to share the pastries."

"Yes Taddette" she nodded as she leaned in for a kiss and then went back to the table. Yan resumed her staring contest with her sister who had gone very still.

"The industrial accident that damaged Ianto was of alien origin" Jack began to speak and as agreed he spoke the truth. He laid it all out, the crystal in Ianto's heart, the chameleon qualities from it and Ianto's new gifts.

True he left out some bits, I don't think she really needed to know about the time thing just yet. After all finding your bother made a prettier woman that you was shock enough for any girl.

"I can be more or less" Yan said, demonstrating as her hair flowed black from the roots like liquid, running to the tips and a raven haired goddess had Jack intrigued.

Then Yan changed her appearance and became Tosh, changing to Dahlia and then Ianto's grin before Yan reappeared. "I like this one though."

"Mama" Rhiannon said softy.

"Yeah" she smiled back, "I didn't realise it was her at first, we lost her so long ago. I guess I miss her so much, wonder about her so much that it seems…right somehow to keep her here, if not just in my heart, then through it."

"My god" Rhiannon leaded back and Jack wondered if it was time to search for the salts then that Jones boom of laughter started and Rhiannon threw her head back as she revelled in the madness of it all.

"You see, I had to live a lie" Yan smiled, "This is me. This sassy, outspoken bitch of a woman is the me Mama would have been friends with, shopped with, told secrets to. I think in my mind I see this me as a daughter to her. You have so much Tad in you and I know it hurts you that you don't have Mama's delicate ways. Rhia, you have her heart and her spunk. I see that."

Rhiannon saw her brother's eyes twinkling in that gorgeous face and she started to laugh again, "You shit. That day at the mall, you looked like you were sucking a lemon. Christ, it was you all along."

"It's been hard not telling you" she confided in Rhiannon as she leaned closer and reached for her hand, those delicate fingers making Rhiannon's look like sausages, "I've needed you so bad. Tosh has been a great sister to me but…you remember mum. You know how hard it's been to look in the mirror at times. Before I could control it her face was all I had."

"So, these kids really are yours and…Christ. Ianto…what ….er…."

"Yan. In female form we call me Yan, in male form it's Ianto." She was told softly, "I'm OK."

"I don't' know if I should hug you or lamp you one" Rhiannon snorted.

"Well I would prefer the hug if there's a voting system" that familiar snark came though and Rhiannon laughed again as she cuddled her sibling, the sister she had always wanted.

Micha was watching with disinterest but David was keenly listening and he spoke up, "Do you have girl parts?"

"Yes David" Yan replied, "I can go all girl. Same as all boy. No, I can't do both."

"Cool" he nodded and went back to eating like it was no big deal.

"So, what now?" Rhiannon asked, "I mean…I have to sort out stuff at the bank and…."

"I will take you" Yan assured her, "We will go and sort things together. In the meantime you stay here with us and we will sort things out."

"I don't…I don't know what to do" Rhiannon said suddenly rising from her chair to pace, "How do I look at his clothes? I can't' bear to touch them, they will smell of him still, won't they."

Yan's heart was torn for her sister as she saw how much she loved him, even if he was a first class pig and she rose to comfort. Rhiannon felt those arms around her and the shoulder to rest her head on was so much like their dear long gone Mama's that finally she was able to weep, clinging to the only family she had left.

"Tomorrow" Jack said firmly from his chair, "Lawyers, bank and whatever else we can look at affairs to be placed in order. We will do all that tomorrow. Today we burried him and now we simply sit and be. OK?"

Rhiannon wiped her eyes and nodded as they walked back to the sofa and sat again, this time feeling a lot better.

They would look after her, better that he ever did.


	68. mother.....rat.....bastard

Rhiannon sat shocked to silence as Jack blinked at the lawyer and asked him to repeat what he had just dumped on them.

"Jonathon Dafyd Davies has left his wife here in considerable debt and a third mortgage on the house" he repeated, now more concerned for the young man who was making a strange sound as he jerked in the chair, then Ianto exploded.

"Fucker!" he spat, "Fat, useless drop of whore's pussy fart…"

Jack slapped a hand over Ianto's mouth and struggled with him, almost tipping the chair over as Ianto groaned and writhed, then settled and the lawyer watched with awe as Jack removed said hand and Ianto took a deep breath then shakily shot his cuffs.

"OK" Jack sat again as Rhiannon watched her brother's red face and she placed a hand over her mouth as she struggled with her own emotions, her brother had never acted like their father before, she had never seen that level of anger and it was as amusing as hell.

"How deep" Ianto asked calmly and the lawyer sighed as he wondered if it would take two to contain him in a moment, "three hundred and twenty thous…."

Ianto slammed a hand down and the lawyer jumped, waiting as Ianto struggled, then settled to stare at the ceiling and count loudly to ten.

"I taught him that" Jack said proudly, "Have to do it all the time with Owen…well, you've met Owen Rhia. Right?"

Rhiannon nodded as she wondered if this was some sort of nightmare.

"So what happens now" Ianto sighed.

"The bank had already started foreclosure proceedings on the house, he was four months behind and….I am sorry Mrs Davies…." He paused again as Rhiannon released a sob and blinked back tears.

"My sister will not be made bankrupt" Ianto said slowly, "You were paid to do a job, do your fucking job. When you have sorted the mess out to where we have a final amount to clear her debts I will be ready to talk, until then get the job done or I will fucking help you."

The lawyer nodded meekly.

"Rhia, do you want to save the house?" Ianto asked and she shook her head, the thought of living where she was afraid and abused unsavoury.

"Right then. I know what that house was worth, I bloody paid for it" Ianto rose as Rhiannon looked up at him with shock, "I want to know where his money went, how much is owed after the house sale. My sister is going to remove her things now, if anyone thinks they are locking her out then they can talk to us."

Ianto rose and everyone else did automatically and they drove off in silence, Ianto staring at the scenery as Rhiannon struggled to understand how Johnny could have done this to her. Tosh saying there was a gambling debt already 'sorted' by the boys also upset her as she knew that he had gone back to his old ways.

How could he.

He may not have cared about her but his own babans.

"The house next to the Lilacs" Jack finally said, "We have to fix it up and we were going to reroof it as well, right?"

"Yes" Ianto said as he realised what Jack was thinking and he turned to look at him with surprise.

"It needs a lot done. Rhiannon, would you seem capable of that job? Oversee the entire refurb?" Jack asked as he swng around the corner like he ws asking if she wanted KFC or fish n Chips for tea. "Yan told me the men liked you."

"You will stay with us until things are all settled, you can help with the house repairs and redecorating and it will be OK." Jack said firmly, "settled."

"How do I tell the kids their father did that to us?" she asked sadly.

"Either truthfully or not at all" Ianto answered, "David is old enough to understand if you feel he needs to know why he is not going home but Mimi would only be confused, money means nothing to her and you would only be telling her that her dad fucked up. Choose. I would say nothing, when they are older and ask one day you will have had time to think it through and have an answer for them that is more metered and less passionate. You might even get through the whole thing without the word 'Bastard' being used."

She snorted softly and rubbed at her face, so bloody tired and fed up.

Ianto was right they were happy, safe and that was all that mattered right now.

It was a lovely house too, a big two story place similar to Ianto's but a smaller scale. She started wondering what it would look like with different colours and the veranda extended. Ianto watched her furtively and relaxed as he watched her perk up at the thought of being useful.

Ianto reached out and hooked Jack's hand, pulling it over to kiss and Jack grinned, "Careful darling, I'm driving and your sister is in the back. What if I get excited and pull into a sideway? Goddess, she is too delicate to see me go feral on you."

As he had hoped, both siblings started to snort with mirth and he grinned as he watched Ianto's' face glow with affection.

Score one for Jack!


	69. building something

"Look Missus…"

"Jones" Rhiannon said, surprising Yan as she sat on the top step of the house watching her sister greet the workers, "its Miss Jones."

"Right. Will Miss, the piles are sound and so is the backbone of the house but the cladding is fu…er…buggered and the roof definitely needs doing before the next winter. She's as cold as a witches tit in there coz there is no insulation so if you were wanting to reline the walls we should insulate those as well as floor and ceiling. Make a hell of a difference."

"Yan?"

"Up to you Sissy" Yan said softly, "Jack wants you to do this, go for it."

"Right then!" Rhiannon puffed, "Do it and while we are at it, can you do something about the fireplace? Ready looking stupid, I would like a more inviting hearth in there, this is a family home. Not a site for a bloody prono shoot."

The builder smiled as he saw her moxie and nodded, then turned to leave but hesitated and glanced at the petite blonde woman watching him, "You want me?"

"We need quite a bit done and I want speed" Yan said as she smiled at him, "I know your brothers will pitch in and I want to give you a chance."

"Thank you Missus Sir" he bobbed his head and took off with a soft hum.

"What did he call you?" Rhia asked Yan with amusement.

"Missus Sir" Yan replied, "I am not sure if it's because they call Jack Sir or is it refers to my sex swapping."

"Sweet" she giggled, then frowned, "Wait. Are you telling me he's a alien?"

"From Dergoltia, humanoid" Yan smiled, "They aren't all little green men ya know. He is like us, just a few minor differences. Sense of smell is more heightened, they don't like getting wet much apart from for grooming reasons as for some weird reason they can't swim. I don't know why, they love any hot or spicy food and are afraid of sheep. Not best for county life then."

"I never know when you are pulling my leg" Rhiannon said as she looked at what she saw as a perfectly human man walk away with very tight jeans and a lovely bum.

"There are five bothers" Yan explained, "We have another family we usually get in for bits and bobs but they are away at the moment visiting family so I thought we would give this lot a try. Been hearing good things within the community.

"Well, he will pretty the place up for a bit anyway" Rhia replied as she turned to smile at Yan, "Thanks by the way. I know you are in female form so I can be in charge. If it was a man sitting there they would all automatically defer to you like I wasn't here."

"Sexist pigs" Yan scowled, then they both laughed softy, "Oi, here comes ….ah….Mattis. He will be doing the garden."

"Hello ladies pretty Yan and other" the alien was obvious, his silted language through a translator as his mandibles clicked, Rhiannon torn between screaming at the huge cockroach and giggling at its high pitched childlike voice echoing from the speaker in its hand.

"Mattis, Rhia. Rhia is my sister..er…my …Hatchling mate"

His body jolted and he moved closer, a hand reaching out to touch her hair and then he stepped back, "Not same."

"No, humans are complex, aren't we" Yan agreed as she fiddled with her skirts "Must be so confusing to a race where you are all uniformly the same."

"Then how do they …." Rhiannon started to ask the most asked question of how they told each other apart and he had clearly heard it enough time to recognize the start of it.

"Smell lady. Smell all."

"Why they love gardening" Yan explained , "Also a high sense of smell means they make more companionable choices in plants."

"So you've introduced two different ones with the same smell qualities?"

"Well, we can't mix them up. If we get one with a low sense it will only insult those of high sense. Imagine that smelly kid in class?" Yan snorted, "Can't be done without ruffling feathers. No, when hiring a crew make them as similar as you can, less arguments and believe me they can argue about weird things."

"Well, I don't care as long as the job gets done" Rhia shrugged as her fear left and she found herself intrigued by the huge bug that was currently clipping a bush with its secondary set of feet that she could now see were sharp talons.

"Yes" Yan said softly as she materialised next to her ear, "They are a warrior race. He's retired. Also very loyal. Those fuckers come here trying to be pigs about Johnny's gambling debts and strong-arm money from you, imagine if that is your watchdog."

Rhia turned to look at Ianto with shock.

"They eat their kills, very efficient" Yan said at her sisters' look, "What. I don't' want to have to clean it up."

Rhia shook her head again as she turned back to watch a wonderful cat appear in the foliage being trimmed.

She never knew when that one there was having her on anymore.


	70. Lucky Luc

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://postimages.org/)

Rhiannon turned as a sound alerted her to someone in the house and the builder entered without seeing her in the corner as he headed for the fireplace.

He bent to measure the fireplace, his jeans hugging his arse in such a way that her mouth went dry and she must have made a noise because he spun to face her with surprise, his face breaking into a grin, "Cherlok! You startled me woman."

"Sorry, I was trying to visualise" she smiled "Ianto gave me some magazines and I found this one."

She moved closer and flicked open the magazine at the picture she had marked and he leaned in to look, making a noise of interest, "Yes, I like that style too. Sort of country rustic with a touch of beachcomber. Like Mother Harkness' place."

"Yes, but she is a bit…well Cat Lady Bordello too" Rhia said without thinking and he laughed, his deep boom soothing.

"Well, I like the natural wood accents" he reached out to tap one of the pictures, "just a hint. Not too much so it's still modern."

"Yes, I like the lack of colour" she continued, "Just a splash of colour here and there. I never knew citrus could look so nice, the white walls and natural wood tones along with the lemon and orange splashes look so inviting."

"The kitchen too" he moved in that direction and she followed, "So, if we have the cooler lemons in this area of the house where the sun spills in, then the bright and burnt oranges in the darker half for the evenings like the fire and such, so we carry the warmth over."

"Oh, yes!" she gasped, her hands flapping and his eyes followed the movement as she gushed, then she bent to look in a low cupboard as she wondered if this entire thing was needed, his eyes widening as her plump hips swayed and her generous arse was presented, his swallow a hard one as he shuffled back a step.

She rose and turned, smiling still and then she noticed his discomfort. "Are you OK?"

"Yes missus" he said softly, "Just…happy for the work. I have five brothers and they have mates, children to feed. I don't want to cock things up."

"Well, I know the feeling and it's Rhiannon" she smiled, "My children are my life. Now it's just me and them I have even more reason to want this to work. My first real attempt at something without my dead husband there to scoff and scorn. I really want to feel satisfied."

"Luc is mine. Your mate is dead" he repeated slowly.

"Yes" she sighed, "Furbies."

He pulled a face, then looked around again, "Mine in childbirth. I have a boy. He be seven now, hard on your own."

She sighed as she felt compassion for him, "You didn't remarry?"

"I have few friends, move in a small circle here in the community. My kind we…well. Not all like us. We are not always welcome. To find another mate, one with the attributes we prefer is difficult" Luc shrugged, "When the Gods will it, one will be presented. I have faith."

"That's nice, to have faith" she smiled "I have faith in those men next door. Not much else right now."

"Yes, the Missus Sir." He smiled, "The Enigma."

"Apt" she giggled softly and his eyes widened a fraction at the sound, "I like that."

"As do I" he said softly as she turned to look up this time, frowning at the cornices.

The Gods are funny things.

He followed her from room to room as she talked and found himself responding, then she was laughing as he told her of his thoughts, his ideas and some of the hideous things some people had asked for and as she finally led him back to the fireplace he knew what was happening.

The Enigma.

Always trust in those who trust in you. That's what his father had always told him, that and don't turn down a good thing.

"I may bring my boy to the site? He and yours may be friends?" he wondered and she smiled.

"He would like that. He and Gray don't seem to get along, Gray is too possessive. David doesn't make a lot of friends, a bit of a plump boy." she agreed.

"My people revere in the fuller body" he said softly, "We believe a well proportioned person is healthy and virtuous. We like our family to be full, happy and well cared for. Your son is a lovely boy, mine is also a …plump one….he does not make friends easily as they are all too skinny and unfed around here."

Rhiannon roared with mirth as she agreed, Gray definitely needed a good feed as far as she was concerned.

As she sat on the large hearth to pull another book over he sat as well, happy to be near her.

Gods, she smelt so fine.

The Enigma was a minx to be sure, setting him up like this.

Of course she was perfect for him.


	71. Damn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://postimages.org/)

The next day he was back, this time in an old beat up jeep instead of the old motorbike from the day before and the small boy that tumbled out looked as rotund as David who was watching with open interest as they started towards them.

"Just looking at paint options for the new cladding" she called out as they neared and she watched David move to the boy who was marginally shorter but the boy stopped to blink at him with interest.

"Shae, this is David" Luc said softly, "He is living next door. Want to see cats? David has cats."

"Cats?" the boy's voice was gravelly, his eyes seemed to blink from the side, not just top to bottom and David was suddenly interested in those green eyes that were sort of…reptilian.

David smiled and nodded, beckoning and they both waddled off.

"Well thank fuck for that" Rhia sighed, "Right funny things, boys. Either like each other or want to hit each other with sticks at that age."

"Yes, I agree" he smiled and Rhia felt herself blush as he focused on her, "You look lovely today. Pink. I like pink."

"Me too" she said happily, "Johnny hated it. I was only allowed dull colours in the house so this is such fun. I can't believe Ianto is letting me do this."

"Well, I guess if you are going to live here it should be what you want" he said as he pulled his beanie off and his blonde hair flopped out to flow around his face. She was busy watching as a piece caught in his short beard, then the words filtered through.

"What?"

"He said this is yours, so I am to do as you like" he said as he flicked the hat onto the top step of the porch, "This needs to go around the house doesn't it. Seems silly to stop when you get the sun right along this side."

"How old are you?" she asked suddenly, making him turn to look at her.

"Er…in Sol 3 time? Ah, hang on. I worked it out last krell….ah…seventy two" He said then frowned, "No. That's not right, that's Gerfillot time. Damn, I always mix things like that up."

"So, you are from somewhere else" she said as diplomatically as she could, "Do you like this planet?"

"Yes, overcrowding in my sector was leading to wars, I knew if I didn't get out my children…well. Child as it turns out…wouldn't have a chance." He looked over at where the boys were chasing a kitten with glee, "I had no idea there could be a planet this lush."

"Well, I'm glad you made it" she said softly, turning to look back at the house, "You must have travelled for a long time."

"Years" he nodded, "worth it."

"So. My brother is intending to give this place to me" she said more to herself than to Luc, "This will be my home."

"Why it's your responsibility I guess" Luc agreed, "Mind, you have great taste. Just like hir."

"Hir"

"If not male or female but something else, it is called hir, H. I. R." he said calmly, "It defines without designation."

"You really aren't human?"

"Humanoid" he said as he pulled a hammer from his jeep and wandered over to pull at a loose board on the side of the house, "Like…60% human, 20% Nergot, 10% Catkind and there is another 10% of don't know what."

"Catkind?"

"Yeah, I love to bask by a fire, drink milk and sometimes when really happy I apparently purr" he said and she grinned as she settled to watch.

Another bullshitter, just like Ianto.

No wonder they got along so well.

"So your wife?"

"Similar but not the Nergot. She had a bit of reptilian to her…makes my son a little unnerving with her eyes. But, most seem to get over it. Well, those here." He smiled.

She found herself wondering just how much of him was human, her eyes then given a feast as he pulled off his shirt and scratched a peck, frowning at the house as if not knowing how damned sexy that was, "Less rot than I thought."

"Huh?"

"The cladding" he said as he turned to face her, his smile soft as she looked back at the children and he saw her vulnerability.

He now saw what the Enigma had wanted him to see.

He looked around and started to see things he hadn't noticed before and he pulled out his phone, he would need his brothers for this.

By nightfall this woman and her offspring would be safe.

If he had to live under her fucking porch to make sure of it.

Something was coming and she was afraid.

So very afraid.

He could smell the danger in the air.


	72. cross my heart and brain box

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://postimages.org/)

The boys had gelled, so much so that the begging had been fierce as they had hugged each other like they might be torn asunder by some huge force and Rhiannon had tried not to laugh as she agreed to the sleep over, both boys crowing as they raced upstairs to see the room they wanted, now the one that would be David's even though he didn't know it yet.

Beds had been put up, food had arrived and other furniture moved in as the house seemed to come alive with laughter and good wishes for her new venture into the unknown.

Now the cat was out of the bag….she had no idea why Ianto had found that so funny, he and Luc giggling together like schoolgirls when she had said it …she was free to live there.

Tosh was lovely as she explained the in-house security and demonstrated with the PDA and she found it sweet how Luc was intently watching her as well, his grunts and soft questions cleverly thought out.

The garden shed was also filled with things and as the boys finally settled in the pop up tent in the bedroom and Micha told her 'Granny' had a warmer bed Rhiannon settled to watch the flames as the house slowly settled into the night.

She felt…right.

Ianto had been the last to leave, hesitant like he was concerned and in the end she had told him sternly to bugger off and put his own kids to bed, his look of pleasure was so warming as Jack had hooked him from behind and kissed his neck as he had stage whispered that he needed putting to bed as well had been deserving of the Jones Eye Roll before they had finally left her alone.

She must have dozed off in the chair because the creak of floorboards was her first indicator that she wasn't alone and she sighed as she wandered which child was creeping downstairs for a midnight snack, the food from Ianto still filling the fridge and she rose to see if they needed help.

She was not expecting the men who were waiting in the darkened hallway and they were clearly not expecting her to be downstairs, or so damned lively.

Seems she was a Jones like she had said.

She roared and screamed as she thought of the young ones upstairs, then snarled as she bit down on the hand slapped over her mouth, her blood boiling as she threw herself back and slammed the man against the wall, another moving in to help so she kicked him in the balls.

Felt good.

Then she glanced up and her mouth dried as she saw another figure at the top of the stairs, a third one.

She screamed for David to run, screamed for her little boy as she fought like a tiger.

Then the back door smashed open and a roar filled the house as a large body slammed into the one who was holding her and as she fell to her knees she looked up at Luc, his teeth gleaming in the moonlight as he swung the hammer like a warrior at one of the men and she looked to the stairs.

The boys.

She stumbled to her feet but Ianto brushed past her already heading that way as Jack stormed to the one still cradling his balls and calmly stomped on his head silencing his moans and as a shot rang out upstairs Luc dropped the body of the man he was bludgeoning and turned to start up the stairs only to catch the body flying down and swing to back onto the floor with disgust.

"Sorry Luc" it was Yan's soft voice and Jack sighed as he knew the bullet had been for Ianto, "Didn't see you there sweetling."

"Are you OK Missus Sir?" Luc asked as she walked down the stairs like a black panther seeking prey in the black silk PJs, heading for Jack who was waiting with open arms.

"I'm fine, you might want to call Mattis. He may want a piece of these" Jack said as he pulled Yan along the hallway, "We will need the extra eyes as well."

"Oi, is that a joke about night vision?" Luc called out as he rose from a corpse and Rhia turned to look at him, seeing him for the first time.

Jeans, no top, white in the moonlight like some ethereal creature and he had smeared the blood on his face like a cross, from forehead to fuzzy chin, and across the eyes.

"Go to the boys" he commanded, "I will watch for more until the bugs get here. Do not fear Sweetling. I will kill them all for you."

Rhiannon headed up to where the two boys stood clutching each other with fear, much as they had earlier with affection and as she reached them she looked back down at the god who stood with the dripping hammer, looking up at her.

She didn't doubt him.

He would kill them all for her.

She was not afraid.


	73. Hornet's Nest stirred...check

Ianto was beyond enraged back in his male self, pacing as he snarled and Jack watched as he cuddled their little one back to sleep. Lin had woken when the house had been disrupted and now he was a limp little bean as he snored softly so Jack settled him back in his little bassinette by the bed, Ianto sitting now and glaring into the room.

"Where were you shot?"

"Head" he replied "Hurt like a bastard too. Fuckers. Thank god Rhia didn't see that."

"I can go get some oranges, the smell of the fresh peel can help" Jack offered and Ianto shook his head as he watched Jack with their son then grimaced at the residual headache.

"So, what now?" Jack asked.

"Well Rhiannon went right off when she realised Luc had slept in the shed and moved him into the house" Ianto said softly as he calmed down, "I can't get Lucky to come inside either. Gods. Luc and Lucy are both pissing on the bushes."

Jack snorted, "Lin. Luc, Lucky. Gods, is this some sort of pattern?"

"Lucy" Ianto said as he stood "Luc's name is Lucy remember. Luc as in Luke came when he realised it was a feminine name. So Luke and Lucky are even more connected. I wonder. Was this something connected? I don't know Cariad. We are some sort of magnet. Then again, Byrd is a little of me."

"I like him" Jack said as he slid into the bed, "He's a nice piece of eye candy too."

Ianto slowly turned to look at him and Jack grimaced, "Sorry. You hate that one. Any consolation that you are my soul food?"

"The papers with them were for exhumation permission, seems the only way they can get around the judge's orders is to have her sign the body back to them" Ianto said as he flopped back to let his head lay on Jack's stomach. "They thought a wee bit of strong arming would do."

Lights lit up the bedroom as vehicles spewed across the lawn and Ianto yawned.

"Mattis is here" Jack said softly, "let's get some sleep. They are safe."

"I know" Ianto sighed as he settled, and the unspoken words hung in the air.

They might be safe.

UNIT wasn't.

.

.

.

.

Next morning the boys were squealing as they ran around outside, thankfully Gray had warmed to the strange boy as well and they had found a ball Byrd did not care for.

She didn't want to join in as it was a pointless act.

"I see. So you don't need to throw a hand grenade one day to blow up a bad guy" Ianto said as if disinterested, buttering some toast, "Totally a boy thing. I agree."

She sat up and glared at him then slid from the chair to storm out and demand they help her learn how to throw better.

Of course Gray insisted and they were soon cannon fodder for a screaming banshee.

"That was cleverly done husband" Jack snorted and Ianto swung with a raised eyebrow.

"Well, she needs a good strong throwing arm" Ianto shrugged,

"And you?" Jack asked, "You need to hit something too?"

"Yes" Ianto said as he opened the jam jar, "I need to hit something hard. I guess I will get the chance soon enough"

"Ideas?"

"They know by now that their bid failed since their team never came back. I doubt we have much time before they try another tactic" Ianto surmised, "maybe we need to be prepared for a counter offensive over this."

"Well at least Luc is there now" Ianto said as he looked out the window and saw the man striding over to the kids and offering them a plate of food.

"That was sneakily done" Jack agreed, "He seems to be settling."

"She will need more time" Ianto sighed, "She doesn't see it yet and I can't force her."

"She will get there, she's a Jones after all." Jack assured him as he saw his vulnerability, "Stop worrying love. Come on, wee Lin is going to want a bottle soon."

"You call the boys, I want them all to stay here tonight as well."

Jack didn't argue, simply went and called the hub where he told all of them to come home for that night and then he called Tosh and Owen who had gone home to sleep off the night shift and said the same adding that the Hub would be on shut down, he wanted them all home tonight.

They had daylight to work, all the community coming together to help one of their own, especially Missus Sir. Hir was upset and they didn't like that one bit. Hir was special, important and they felt it was a personal attack against them all to have their hated enemy come into their community like they had every right.

Tonight, if they came they had better come better armed.

Not that it mattered now.

They would fall like cord wood.

This time they would be ready.


	74. Line in the sand...or fresh cut lawn

They did come.

In broad daylight like the fools they were, striding across the freshly mowed lawn with their boots sinking into the lush grass as Rhiannon looked up from the paint pot she was stirring with a stick she had taken off the children before they poke an eye out or something.

The way they had laughed it was obvious Ianto uses the same saying.

So she stood, the stick dripping pearl pink on the newspaper as they came towards her, their red caps jauntily placed and she opened her mouth to tell them to fuck off but Luc beat her to it.

"Who tha fuck da you think ya are!" Luc was roaring as he stroke towards them with a strange brogueish accent, his hammer once more swinging at his hip and the Unit men hesitated with surprise as he stepped between them and Rhiannon, his intent to protect clear.

"Fuck off" he raised his head, his chin jutting out so his short blonde beard seemed to be a blade cutting the air.

"You heard him" Ianto's soft vowels had them turning to find the gentle looking man in the three piece suit who had spoken standing next to their vehicle looking at it with disgust, "This…display is unnecessary. I believe we were quite clear in the return of your men."

A beat and Ianto sighed, "Ah. Damn. Mattis and his hive must have eaten all of them then."

The men gaped at him.

"Look, your last team were eliminated and it was a shame because if you had just come to Torchwood in the first place we could have explained to you that we win" Ianto shrugged, "We always win."

"Look, mister…."

"Harkness-Jones and it's First Lieutenant if we are going to get pissy with titles and stuff" Ianto frowned as he turned towards the grill of the vehicle where Jack stood silently, "Or is it Admiral now. I don't know, Cariad you were listening to her weren't you? I was watching Byrd with the corgis."

"First Lieutenant love" Jack agreed as he casually leaned against the Unit van, "You turned down a higher office because you didn't want to appear too greedy."

"Ah" Ianto smiled lovingly at his Captain as Jack leaned over and pulled a switch blade from his pocket and started to scratch the paintwork, the drawing becoming a….rocket? Sausage or… "Jack! What will that tell the babans?"

"Oops? It slipped in my hand?" Jack said as the dick pic was now finished so he grinned and slid it back into his pocket.

"Bad Captain" Ianto scolded. "Bad, bad Captain."

Jack grinned some more as Ianto turned back to Unit, "Now. Paperwork? Her Majesty's signature?"

"huh?"

"You are on Her Majesty's land, where is your rite of passage?" Ianto asked officiously. "Got it?"

"No?" Jack helped them with the big words.

"Right, piss off then" Luc said as he swung the hammer in the direction of their vehicle, "Or I will cleave your skulls."

"Wow" Jack said happily, "Cleaving in the morning."

"Look Captain Harkness, we…"

"Harkness-Jones since this handsome man caught me and made an honest man of me" Jack postures, then frowned as he reconsidered, "Well, sort of honest."

"Cariad" Ianto crooned, "You cheat, you always cheat."

"Yeah, but not with you" Jack whined with big eyes.

The men suddenly realised they had been flanked by five other men as burly and unfriendly as Luc, his brothers now resembling extras in some sort of Viking movie as he openly simmered.

"I think you boys had better go before they decide you look better in a hole in the back yard" Jack pointed out and the Unit men started to back up. "Don't come back unless with a signed decree from her majesty giving you permission to be on our land."

As the vehicle peeled out Rhiannon turned to her brother and demanded, "What are you talking about, Her Majesty's land? I thought you owned this."

"Well, this is Wales, right? All hers then" Ianto shrugged and Jack grinned at her.

"He cheats too" he confided to her as Ianto walked over to Luc and they had a quiet conversation, the men all deflating as Ianto soothed them.

Jack turned slowly to watch the arse end of the vehicle disappear through the large gates at the end of the cul-de-sac and he wondered if it was time to close them.

He knew it would have to happen sooner or later but had hoped they could stay part of the outside world a little longer but given the growing community maybe it was better this way.

Jack and Ianto shared an unspoken agreement as they both handed keys out to those assembling, locking their community from visitors.

Now the only way for anyone to enter was via the front door of the Harkness-Jones house.

Good luck there.

.

.

.

.

To those wondering why they wanted Johnny's body…because UNIT claimed the site and the boys stole it. Also, I think because they are pricks.


	75. pink for promise?

Tosh accepted her cup of tea and leaned over the edge of the chair to check on wee Hero who was asleep in his capsule still.

"You did what we all knew was going to happen eventually" Owen was saying as he cuddled his baby girl possessively, "Tosh and I are eyeing up that two story place on the corner, the one that looks like it had bats in the belfries, Halloween will be so damned cool."

"The black and purple place?" Yan asked as she wafted in and Tosh perked up as she saw the female version of her friend, signalling some 'girl time' as the hub was so full of testosterone lately she was choking on it.

"Yan, can we find out about that one?" Tosh asked and Yan smiled as she assured her it was already on the purchase list.

"An elderly couple thinking of a retirement home" Yan confided, "I am working on them to find what they want and then offer them a bit more. I think we will have that in our clutches in another few months."

"Then how many?" Tosh asked and Yan raised an eyebrow. "How many houses left to purchase in this area?"

"The Petersons look to be staying since their oldest has taken up with a Bofitt. I was worried we would have to Retcon them but they are not only receptive to living amongst aliens or their daughter marrying one, they are great for when they need a human voice or face for some of their various businesses. We can't be there all the time and another human family would be a tremendous help"

"So, them aside?"

"Four more and then we can fence the entire block" Yan smiled, "I think I need to step it up, lock it down all the way. As long as there are houses not in our control, there are leaks."

"Agreed" Tosh reached for a pad and pen, amazed at how Ianto had these things scattered about then she smiled at herself for thinking of them as two different people.

"Is Rhia OK?" Owen asked and Yan focused on him.

"Shaken and more than slightly stirred" Yan sighed, "Luc and his brothers are doing a great job. Rhia is already moved in and decorating like mad. I think her nails are suffering though."

"Really?" Tosh said as she watched Jack perk up, listening, "Shame. You know how important nails are to a girl."

"You know, she has never has a real spa day" Yan said as she caught on, "Prick wouldn't let her waste money on herself."

"That so" Jack said as his eyes narrowed, "You know, I think you girls should bugger off for some girl time so us menfolk can fart openly."

"Charming" Yan rolled her eyes as she wondered what Luc's reaction would be to bright pink talons on her sister.

After all, Pink is a colour of arousal for Nergot and he was 20%.

Right?

Rhia was both shocked and overjoyed when invited as she didn't have many friends, well...none since Johnny ...well….and she did like wee Tosh.

The idea of a pamper day was wonderful and Yan said they needed to go shopping first to get some things for a spa day so they all clambered into the SUV and froze as Luc climbed in and sat with his arms folded as he declared himself their bodyguard.

Yan watched Rhia laugh at him and smiled, seeing her happy.

They drove to a boutique where they started looking at clothes and as expected Luc was there as well, finding pink pretties to show Rhia and Yan settled on a sofa to watch as Rhia twirled for him, his clapping as he declared her 'superbly proportioned in that' as Tosh sighed and wondered if Owen would ever get the hint to do something like that.

"She still doesn't see it" Yan muttered and then sighed, "Us Jones' are tough nuts."

Tosh snorted, "I could have told you that!"

"I have never thought of her in danger" Yan said quietly to her best friend, "It never occurred to me that she could ever leave, get hurt…die. This had scared me so much, to think those bastards thought they could just make her do what they wanted, right next door to where my babies were asleep and safe."

"I look at mine and worry of they will survive Owen to adulthood" Tosh replied "I am scared he will smother one to death."

"Fine young loves" Yan assured her, "In my mindseye I see them as grownups all handsome and vibrant with a touch of dangerous. Like gun power in the air. I think Kitty will be thoughtful and quick to find solutions where as Hero will just wanna blow it up."

Tosh laughed as she smiled at Yan, "God, that would be a thing. An Owen sized assassin."

"A Blowy-uppy Owen doll" Yan giggled and they watched Luc stalk a fur stole with a look of confusion, poke it and then roar with mirth as he plucked it off the mannequin to shake at Rhia.

Yan was enjoying her day out, she hoped the menfolk were too as they had forgotten the small matter of the babies and were now unsupervised as Dahlia sat in the other side of Yan watching her purple nails get glitter on the tips.

Lord.


	76. cuffed

It was David who pointed out their slight miscalculation in their plans for an afternoon of sitting in the sun.

"Uncle?"

"Yes love?" Jack asked as he struggled to crack a walnut with the hammer.

"One of the babies has shat itself" he informed him, watching his face pale as he looked up at him with horror.

"Micha said I had to tell you" he said imperiously, "Apparently she is too young to be a mama."

"Um…shit?" Jack said as he turned to Owen, "One of yours ya think?"

"Nah, she changed them before she left" Owen frowned, "Hey Rhys. Your fella shit himself today?"

Rhys blinked and then turned, "Hey Andy. You shit yourself today?"

They all roared with mirth, then sobered as the penny dropped so they left their toys…er...tools and wandered inside.

Gray was looking at the babies with total revulsion. His eyes rolled to his brother and he said distinctly, "rotten."

"Ah shit, they took Byrd with them?" Jack asked, "I don't remember them saying they were taking her."

"So?" Owen asked, then as if in answer the babies all started to scream and roar as one, four little lumps of pure anger.

"Shit, er..they all smell" Rhys said with disgust.

"Well…lets separate them to different corners" Owen decided to be in charge, "Then we can see who is shitty and who is just farting, right?"

"OK"

They all moved the babies and a sniffing competition started, Owen declaring his the smelliest farters but he was sure he knew the difference between farts and shit. Jack leaned over wee Lin and sniffed as his son watched with wide eyes, his little face splitting into a grin. They all looked at Rhys as Andy held their son under his arms with a look of fear or flight mode engaging.

"Well…I guess he is all your…" Jack turned to see Owen disappearing out the door at a run followed by the three older children and his mouth fell open as Andy thrust the baby as Rhys and ran out yelling over his shoulder that someone had to sort food for the kids while Owen watched them.

"Right." Jack sad slowly, looking at Rhys who has started to giggle with mild hysteria.

Jack plucked the baby up and expertly changed him, not even upsetting the wee tyke who was soon back with the others happily kicking away.

"Bloody hell, you got that down to a fine art" Rhys said and Jack started to snigger, glancing outside where the other two were prancing about like fucktards as they did a yucky dance.

"Wanna mess with them?" Jack asked and Rhys nodded.

When the two men wandered outside the other two looked relieved to see everything was OK and the baby monitors were being waved, "They all nodded off to a bit of Elvis on the radio."

"Awwww, That was nice" Andy smiled as Rhys leaned in for a kiss, then he squeaked as he looked at the smudge of something brown on Rhys' face, by his eyebrow.

"What?"

"Er…nothing" Andy said softly.

Rhys smiled as he settled to pick up a piece of wood and look at it like he was an art critic.

Jack sniffed his hands and frowned, "I can still smell it ya know."

"Yeah, was kinda…weird. Never seen it all gluey like that" Rhys said as Owen stopped bashing a nail energetically into a piece of wood like a three year old at day-care.

"Gluey?" he asked, "Like mucus?"

"Yeah, real sticky" Jack agreed ad he leaned back and raised his hands over his head in a yawn, "Gods, I still smell it ya know."

All eyes followed the movement and zoned in on the brown smudges on his cuffs, the horror beginning to dawn.

"Well, this looks nice" Jack lunged for the sandwiches as they both yelled and they dove to stop him, his face one of confusion, "What, no shares?"

"Go wash up first" Owen waved a hand nervously.

"Nah, I was careful" Jack looked at his cuff and sniffed it as Rhys scratched at his face.

Jack licked the cuff and twin groans of disgust filled the air.

"What" Jack barked, "It's just chocolate pudding…I think."

He licked it again experimentally and they moaned some more. Rhys reached out and let his hands wave over the food, the brown from his eyebrow now under his nails.

"Ooo egg. Stinky farts" Rhys giggled as he took one.

Jack decided he had been mean enough, "You got choc pud on your face mate, we shoulda used spoons."

"Yeah but licking the bowl is the best bit" Rhys argued, "At least I rolled me sleeves up first."

"Yan's favourite" Jack confided and the other two finally got the game and started abusing them for horrifying them like that.

Totally worth it.


	77. family talk

Ianto was feeling lazy, his hand rising to look at the manicured fingernails with amusement on his male hand. He wondered if he should change back but then decided it didn't matter as his little girl snuggled against him.

Luckily he had boxer shorts on, pulled into the bedding after the evening of…activity with Jack who not only found Yan irresistible, but had found Ianto with those nails more than exciting too.

"I feel like a cross dresser for the first time since this all happened" Ianto whispered and Jack snorted as he snuggled the other side of him, Gray snoring on the other side of Jack like a wee lumberjack cutting wood.

"Sexy" Jack whispered, "So damned sexy. I can't' wait to see them against one of your dark suits…ooooo….pinstripe…please?"

"Really?" Ianto looked surprised as he looked at his love, his face so close their noses rubbed together, "They look huge."

"Yeah" Jack grinned, "I wanna see Owen's face!"

Ianto smiled as he kissed him, teasing him as Gray's snoring stopped and a small voice calmly called out, "Hungers!"

"Go see if Mama is downstairs, I can smell coffee so I bet she's down there cooking for the men working today" Ianto said and Gray growled as he slid out and pulled a robe around himself, stomping off as Byrd yawned and then slipped out to follow.

"How long before Lin wakes?" Jack said with his eyebrows waggling and the answering chuckle from the baby monitor had Jack flopping back with a growl of frustration.

"That answer that one?" Ianto giggled as he rose and went next door to the nursery where Lin was waiting patiently, a little giraffe toy getting a cuddle "Ooooo, hello Gerry Giraffe. Are you and Lin having a cuddley wuddley?"

Lin grinned happily at his Taddette, holding it out and Ianto kissed the toy, then gathered his son who was gaining weight nicely. Since his birth Ianto had felt so supported and he knew this time around he was not going to hesitate in demanding his child, his place and his rights. It was nice to know Dahlia had started to back down, especially with Rhiannon here now.

Ianto changed and dressed his wee beast, the giraffe swapped for a polar bear. Wee guy seemed to like animals and Ianto looked up at the little glass pretties his Dadda had started leaving for him and knew Jack had noticed as well.

Mica was in the kitchen, her and Byrd holding their mugs all prissy like so their little nails gleamed and Ianto smiled as he settled in a chair, the baby in his lap.

"Why hello there Snot" Byrd said with a wrinkle of her nose, "You got a teddy?"

The little face changed to confusion as he looked up at his Tadda.

Jack started to laugh, "A Teddy is a Teddy Bear. A Tadda is a Taddy. They sound the same don't they. I guess because Taddy is like a Teddy, all cuddly and wonderful, yeah?"

The baby seemed to consider, then laughed softly as he squeezed his little bear so it made a growling noise.

"I never thought about it" Ianto smiled, "I wonder if that is where the name came from."

"Oh you still have your nails" Dahlia said with delight, "So pretty. Look at that, you have such delicate hands they still look pretty with the masculine wrists."

"Yeah, who woudla thought" Ianto smiled, "I can play me guitar wearing these I guess."

"I can play me piano with you wearing those too" Jack quipped and Ianto blinked, then started to laugh as he pushed at Jack.

"Ya Twypsn!" Ianto snorted.

Luc walked in and saw the baby, his face lighting up as he rushed to steal him, cooing as he kissed and crooned at the wee man who happily accepted the love of the pretty man who purred like Lucifer does.

Rhiannon entered and smiled as she saw her daughter and niece locked in conversation. The boys entered and waved, Gray lighting up as he watched them sit next to him and they talked about their day ahead, playing in the garden. Ianto hoped that Gray would soon feel safe enough to join the sleepovers the other two were enjoying so much.

"They match well" Luc said as he watched his son glow with the joy of friendship, "All good men one day."

"Yes Luc, they will grow to be good men" Ianto smiled, "And good friendships make for lifelong companions."

"I was lucky to have my brothers" he nodded, "My son to be only one always worried me, he not alone now, yes?"

"No, he will never be alone" Rhiannon said as she buttered some toast, her power currently off during some work being done, "David and Gray here are family to him now."

Luc looked at her lovingly and he smiled a he accepted the toast "And I am not alone either, yes?"

"Of course not" she snorted as she started on another piece, "You are ours now."

Ianto smiled as Luc shone with delight.

She was starting to get there.


	78. nice couple

Luc had been thinking, watching the lovely Hir and the little boys playing as the girls pretended not to care.

"I have thoughts" he finally said and Ianto turned to him with a raised eyebrow, still waiting for Jack to finish with his wee boy.

"They need a house" Luc said as he pointed at the kids and the dog that was currently chasing them, "Like a little one for sleeps."

"A cubby house" Ianto nodded, "It is like a miniature version of a proper house so they can pretend to be grups with a house of their own. Little table and chairs so they can nest in there and have fun, even a sleep area for afternoon naps and things."

"I could make one?" Luc asked.

"Tell you what, ask Jack to help you as he wants to spend time with you and doesn't know how to approach it, he wants to be your friend" Ianto smiled.

Luc liked surprised and a little chuffed as he nodded and when Jack came out he spoke to him straight way, "You and me should build our children a kitty house…no…cubby. Cubby house.

Jack lit up as he agreed and told Luc he would tell Andy and Rhys to mind the hub over the weekend and they could have a real go at it. Ianto saw the two men as they would have been as little boys, both hooking their pants up as they talked excitedly, eyes wide and arms flapping.

"What are you up to" Rhia asked as she came alongside her brother and looked in the direction he had been, seeing the two men bonding.

"Aw, sweet. Are they making a play date?" she asked with mirth.

"Yeah, they are going to build a cubby house down the back of your house for the kids." Ianto smiled.

"Oh, how wonderful" Rhia said with surprise.

"It was Luc's idea" Ianto told her, "He is so happy they all like each other. In his world children grown in clumps and he was so worried about the boy. To see a family here had given him relief. His brothers are all in their own colony but he doesn't have a house yet, his oldest brother providing for him but they do not get along. Too picky with the children and Luc is a bit protective of his only offspring."

"I worried about David being the only one, when I fell with her I was so relieved. Can't believe they don't like each other" she sighed.

"Well, brothers and sisters fight" Ianto reminded softly, "Doesn't mean there isn't love too."

She smiled as she accepted his hug and then she watched Jack flutter back to them, "we're gonna build a wee house!"

"Yay" Ianto replied in a calm, even voice as Rhia giggled.

"Right, work" Jack said happily, "I really wanna see Owen's eyes following those nails."

"Just one more thing" Ianto said as he watched Jack fluff his coat and Jack looked up with surprise.

"Where is Lin? He's coming to the hub for face time with his friends, right?" Ianto asked and Jack raced for the house as Ianto laughed at him.

"He is really good for you" Rhia noted, "Must be nice to have a man that caring, attentive to your needs."

As she spoke Ianto watched Luc approaching totally unaware of the conversation, "Rhi, you want the pink in the hall too? The pretty shell one?"

"Pearl" she corrected gently, "Yes please Luc."

"And I see the carpet men come tomorrow so I make sure it all done today" he assured her, "You want stairs done with carpet too, right?"

"Yes, the runner right up, just the wood showing each side" she explained, "Cold in the winter on bare feet otherwise."

Luc looked down at her bare feet and smiled softly, "Pretty toes."

She looked down at the nails and smiled as she spread her hands to show all her nails matched and he crooned happily, "Pretty claws too. You fight with those, they be sorry."

She laughed as him and Ianto found himself grinning too.

"Here we are" Jack called happily, the baby in his wee capsule with an expectant look like he knew where he was going and Ianto smiled as he turned to follow them.

"I will be here" Luc called after them, "I will stand."

"Thanks Luc" Jack waved as he climbed up onto the step of the SUV, Ianto's arse wriggling as he knelt in the seat to belt Lin in the back and Luc pointed, Jack swung to look and looked back with a leer.

"Nice couple" he said to Rhia who showed her Jones moxie as she answered quickly.

"Can you see them from that angle?"

He turned to look at her and blink, then he started to laugh. A deep belly laugh that filled her with glee.

As he walked away he was repeating what she had said with a shake of his head and Rhia blinked as she watched him bend to pick up something.

Damn.

Nice couple.


	79. a thinking tap

Jack was driving, Ianto riding shotgun and Owen and Tosh in the back as they talked softly about their work.

Ianto stretched and tapped his fingernail against his leg making Jack glance over at the bright purple talon with open lust.

"Gods, but that is sexy" Jack finally said and Ianto turned with a raised eyebrow, "Your nails. I like them red too."

"Like this?" Ianto held his hand up and the nails seemed to bleed to bright fire engine red making Jack check the road and swallow. "I've finally mastered that bit."

"What bit?" Owen leaned through the seats with interest.

"I can now apply my makeup by thought" Ianto said, proving it as his lips changed to match his nails and Owen stared at the strange sight of Ianto bloody Jones with red lipstick that a hooker would be proud of, then it faded away.

"Look at you" Jack sighed happily, "A perfect self-made man…er…woman…I every sense of the word."

"And to think" Ianto purred, "I am perfectly made for you."

Owen grumbled in the back seat, "Well, if you're done being perfect maybe that perfect match can pull over to the side of the road for a tick."

"Why?" Ianto was looking out the window with interest now as Jack went to turn the wheel.

"So I can puke" Owen growled, "All this nicey nice shit is turning my stomach."

The slap as Tosh reached across a startled Andy filled the SUV.

"What was that?" Rhys asked through the coms, "Did she lamp him? Eh? Did Tosh lamp him?"

"Yep" Jack chortled.

"What's the time!" Rhys demanded and Andy checked his watch.

"12.30, ah bugger!"

"Told ya!"

"What are you two up to?" Ianto frowned and laughter came through the coms.

"We had a bet, when Owen would get a slap." Rhys giggled, "We heard about you girls going on a day out and we knew someone would say something and get a thump. I bet Owen, after 12pm. I win, hahahaha."

"And I wasn't included in this?" Ianto was incredulous, "You know I can get Jack slapped in five seconds flat by his mama!"

"Exactly, your odds are sooooo low it's not worth the bet" Rhys was choking with laughter as Ianto frowned as Andy.

"How rude!" Ianto said dryly then snorted with mirth, "Cheeky beggars."

"So, what's your afternoon plans?" Andy asked as the SUV crawled to a stop outside the Harkness-Jones house and Ianto turned to grin back at them.

"I'm going to spend the afternoon with the kids, maybe make a pillow fort and watch TV" He said happily, "Maybe Star Wars or Jurassic Park marathon."

They all groaned and Ianto glanced at Jack who was smiling softly as he saw where this is going, "Need some food love?"

"Yeah, pizza and fizzy drinks" Ianto gushed and more groans issued from the back, "Thinking those mattresses could be made up like a big bed. Could fill the whole floor area, and have the sofas for beds too."

"Sounds like a lot of fun" Jack glanced over to where Luc was visible digging a hole for a shrub and Ianto glanced over, then back at Jack, "Maybe a sleepover for all the kids."

Now Jack knew where he was going and could only grin at his cheeky monkey.

"So I was going to invite ALL the kids" Ianto continued and Owen perked up.

"Are mine included?" he asked, "They could come, I'll help supervise! They sleep mostly."

"Oh, wonderful idea Owen, you can all come" Ianto smiled at him. "Give Rhia the night off."

"And Luc" Jack muttered, "A nice quiet night just the two of them."

"Well, I suppose so" Ianto said with side sliding eyes as Jack laughed softly at his cunning mate.

"So, I guess we could all take the afternoon off if Rhys finishes that report on the stupid piece of tat we just dropped off?" Ianto said, continuing the innocent face.

"Yes!" Owen fist pumped as he started to struggle out of the SUV and Tosh calmly unclipped the belt that was restricting him and he was off yelling over his shoulder, "I bags the mattress nearest the back sofa coz Yan will pinch that and have the best treats!"

"Well, apparently I will have the back sofa made up" Ianto said dreamily, "As Yan no less."

"Awwww, look. Wee fella wants a sleep over" Jack crooned as they all climbed out and they saw the kids running after Owen, definitely the leader of the pack. "Look at that, he already rounded them up."

"Just to make sure they know which bed is his no doubt, all that boarding school as a child coming in to play" Ianto nodded, "Makes him a crafty little shit."

"Yeah, lucky he's ours" Jack smiled.

"Yeah, he is kinda cute" Ianto smiled.

He glanced at his friend and noted her soft smile as she watched him and knew what his next mission would be.

But Rhia and Luc first.

* * *

 


	80. Finally!

The house was so quiet, almost freakily so as Rhia walked through to the living room and stopped, then smiled as she watched Luc peering out the window at the kids running about.

"They OK?" she asked.

"Yeah, Owen is playing with them" he answered, "I planted the bush and I am going to finish that stair tread now."

"Lovely" she nodded as she walked over to the side table and started to carefully unwrap the things waiting to see the light, excited now the room was done and ready to dress. That's what they call it when you personalize it, dressing it. She loved that.

Luc was bashing away and then here was a loud grunt, a thud and silence.

Rhia moved a glass bauble closer to the light and watched the colours flicker.

She canted her head, listening but Luc was silent.

That was new.

Rhia padded through to see what he was doing and was horrified to find Luc folded in a heap at the base of the stairs, his lovely blonde hair slowly turning crimson as his scalp bled.

He had struck his head on the edge of the banister while reaching under it to retrieve his dropped hammer. What a stupid..boneheaded…

He blinked up at her and smiled.

Useless….male…sweetheart.

awwww, poor baby.

She helped him to the living room sofa and sat him there, pulling her apron off and pressing it to the wound and then hurried for the first aid kit Ianto had repeatedly told her to keep handy. Then she carried it back and leaned in to look, Luc crying out and pulling back as she tried to check the wound.

She didn't know how it happened but she wound up straddling him as she applied some butterfly plasters and if wasn't until he made a small noise she realised she had blown on the wound like she would one of the children.

It was while pondering this that she leaned in and mindlessly kissed it better.

What?

What the hell did she do that for?

She looked into his cold icy blue eyes for sign of annoyance and felt his hands slide around her hips as he pulled her closer, his lips seeking hers.

Jesus H Christ of a fucking Harley!

His hands were now sliding up her sides and she felt that familiar pulling in her gut as he moaned softly, canting his head for a deeper kiss as his hands splayed across her shoulder blades like wings.

Wings.

And she did feel like she was flying.

She suddenly became aware of her weight on him, his arousal against her thigh and she started to pull back only to have him clamp those hands down and pulled her in, turning to press her against the sofa.

"You are so beautiful" he sighed, "Lovely woman, I want you."

She was stunned as she looked up at him, now looming over her like a Norse God, his eyes suddenly dark and fathomless as he leaned in, his lips warm for such a cool skin.

"Beautiful" he repeated, "I must have you, you must yield to me."

Yield? Yeah, sure whatever.

She must have said it out loud because his face softened as he pressed against her, "Yield, as in agree my love. I would never take what is not given freely. I mean to say…you must consume me…is that the right word?"

"Yeah" she panted, "Works for me."

"Yeah" he agreed, pulling at her wantonly and she vaguely remembered Ianto saying the children were with him tonight, the darkening world outside the living room window seemed worlds away as he took her to the floor in front of the fire like she weighted nothing, his predatory grin as warm as the fire he had lit earlier and now fed eagerly.

Of course he did.

Getting chilly in here.

Can't have that, not if there is about to be some nakedness.

Rhiannon blushed at her thoughts and then he was there, mewling and running against her as he licked at her skin, her blush doing something to him that she couldn't fathom.

It was glorious.

He knelt over her, pulling his clothes off with a frantic snarl that was so animalistic she started to wonder if he was part something dangerous….

Well a lot dangerous….

That was …nice too

Then her clothes were being torn from her as he panted and whined, entering her easily and roaring with delight as he took her to somewhere Johnny never could.

For the first time in her life, without the aid of a vibrator, Rhiannon had an orgasm…and another…another…oh….oh… She had thought it a myth, the multiple orgasm but…. Rhiannon threw her head back and cried out as her world blew apart.

And he made her whole.


	81. homes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://postimages.org/)

Yan was humming.

Jack knew something had happened by the way his love was swinging those hips as she danced about the kitchen depositing pancakes onto plates.

"The Vickers place just went" Yan said happily, "The one Owen and Tosh need."

Owen froze, his fork half way to his mouth as Tosh squealed and ran outside to look across the lawn at the old to story house with its imposing eves. It looked like Dracula might live there, bodies in the basement kinda thing and Tosh had loved it at first sight. The attic windows were leadlight and she could see herself up there with the space turned into a small art studio, her water colours drying in the heat.

Yan had followed her out, "I called in last night to see how they were and they confided that their son was ill out in Spain and they wanted to emigrate. Seems they will be gone as soon as the money clears…which it did this morning after I left their place. Two weeks, I reckon and they will be all gone. Maybe you should go see if they plan on storing their furniture or having a yard sale. Bound to be pieces that suit that house."

Tosh squealed again, jazz hands as she danced and Yan laughed softly.

"What's going on?" Rhia called as she walked towards them and Yan turned to answer, then canted an eyebrow as she saw exactly what had been going on as the large love bite on her neck peeked out from her collar.

"My house" Tosh screamed pointing, "I got my house!"

Rhia's face lit up as she seized Tosh's hands and they bounced up and down, Luc suddenly appearing to watch Rhia bounce with wide lust filled eyes.

Yan watched Rhia share Tosh's excitement and realised this was probably the first real friends she had apart from those other mothers who sat at the kitchen table and talked kids, bills and nits. Tosh was the first friend that had a touch of adult to her.

"Oh Rhia, two weeks Yan thinks, two weeks and we will be neighbours" Tosh gushed "Just think of it. We can sit out here and have coffee and watch the kids play. Oh, shopping together and when the kids are all at Yan's we can even have dinner parties."

Rhia looked like she might burst as she agreed, Luc stepping forward, "And I will help make it your own personal nest pretty little bird."

"Oh Luc, yes!" Tosh laughed, "First of all will be an exterior paint. Wow, think of it ivory white with a black roof and purple trim. It will look so much friendlier."

"Yes, purple is good" he agreed, "almost as pretty as pink."

Rhia blushed as she beamed at him and Yan smiled as she watched Luc puff with delight.

"Well, of all you lovelies are done dancing, I am taking my sweetling out for some time alone" Jack called as he walked towards them, "Come on love. Let's go shopping. Lin could use some one on one time."

"Byrd no interested?" Yan asked with surprise, the little girl usually loving a chance of a ride.

"No, they are still in the fort Owen made in the living room" Jack laughed "apparently they are all settled for the day, including Owen."

"Well at least Andy got Rhys out of it before he wreaked it" Yan smiled, accepting the baby as Dahlia arrived to hand him over along with his nappy bag and battle warmer, "Come on little one, a wee ride for some shopping and maybe we can watch the birdies over the bay."

"Sounds like a plan love" Jack smiled as he offered his hand and they walked to the SUV and an afternoon of quiet time, just the three of them.

Lin loved the idea of the birdies flying over the water.

Birdies are cool.


	82. big mouth

The fish and chips tasted wonderful, just the way Yan liked them and she smiled as she watched Jack run along the water's edge swinging the baby down so little toesies got wet, making the baby squeal with fake horror then burst into peals of laughter as Jack swung him up above his head again.

The sun was warm and the gentle breeze caught Yan's hair whipping it about her face as she lifted her head, closing her eyes to bask.

Jack was laughing at his son and swung to look back, intending to say something silly but the sight of his mate was so captivating that he lowered the baby and manoeuvred him in his arms as he whispered, "Look Lin. Isn't' Taddette pretty?"

Lin's coo agreed wholeheartedly as he snuggled against that wonderful chest, feeling the heart he knew so well and Jack did the front pack up around the wee body.

Jack walked over and his shadow fell over Yan where she sat in the pebbles, her eyes slowly opening to look at him as she smiled. Gods, she was fuckable.

"All OK?" Jack asked.

"My feet hurt so these shoes will be fed to Ferdinand tomorrow" Yan replied as she glared at her sandals, then she smiled, transforming into some alluring siren pouting for a kiss.

Jack knelt to oblige but as he leaned in the baby tilted his head and Yan laughed softly, obliging the baby with a gentle kiss to his chubby wee cheek, the warm doughy skin tasting of salt from the water.

"Oi!" Jack laughed , "Cheeky beggar, steeling my bird."

Lin laughed and pointed at a flock of gulls flying overheard as if to say, plenty more and they all laughed as he showed his advanced development, just like Byrd.

"I need to secure that place on the corner" Yan said as she leaned against Jack, letting the baby get a handful of hair to amuse himself with, "Then Andy and Rhys can have it. Then we will have the entire cul-de-sac from front to back."

"Who's in there?" Jack asked with a frown, knowing it was not some elderly couple happy of the money.

"The Banderfits" Yan said softly, "They are like fecking vampires the way they only come out at night."

"They have sun allergies" Jack defended them, "This planet is not conducive to their skin."

"Well, why did they settle here then" Yan harrumphed and Jack realised she was playing.

"My charm and good looks, also the fact they are bum height means they are entranced with my mighty chubbie" Jack waggled his eyebrows as Yan laughed and watched Lin's we head bounce happily against the heaving chest of his father.

"You know…Archie could do with them underground in the main archives" Yan sat up with shock at not thinking of it earlier, "They need never go topside again. He was complaining just the other day that he needs some minions. Feck, put some little dungarees on them and chopper them there overnight."

"Archie" Jack slapped his hand onto his face as he agreed, also not sure why such an obvious solution was never seen before, "They love old musty things."

"And the archives will interest them too" Yan giggled and Jack snorted again.

"I'll call him tomorrow, he will jump at it, he used to have a herd of Fingles" Jack said as he settled the sleepy baby more, "They couldn't talk but their looks were pure poison. Like cats. Naked, hairy, wrinkly, ugly ones."

"You sure they weren't just Sphinx?" Yan asked and Jack frowned.

"Like the pyramids?"

Yan rolled her eyes as she pulled out her phone and googled Sphinx cats, then showed Jack a picture of one and his mouth dropped.

"Well. Bugger me" he said softly, "Shit. Don't tell Archive whatever you do. He was sure they were aliens that he had befriended. Did studies on them and everything."

Yan started to giggle at the thought of the old fool taking covert pictures and documenting their yawns and Jack joined in, "Gods. Hairless cats. Why did I never….Ooooo. Do you think Owen knows about them?"

Yan let her smile fade as she saw her mate start to scheme and saw a new edition to the family whether she liked it or not.

"Ewwww, not one of those" she said, "They are not exactly Cardiff material."

"Rubbish" Jack was clambering to his feet, the baby in the front pack swinging wildly as Jack started to get excited and Yan resisted the urge to punch herself in the face, "Archie is in Scotland, and they lived with him for bloody years. The oldest one was about sixteen when it got run over by his mobility scooter. Gods!"

"What? Wait, he ran it over?" Yan rose and watched Jack grab the picnic stuff up, hurling it into the basket with abandon, "Mobility scooter? He doesn't need one of those, he's as fit as a bloody fiddle"

"Yeah, but he still wanted one for the long zoom along the archives warehouse" Jack said as he picked up the basket and something made a horrible tinkering noise inside, Gods it was probably the nice bowl the strawberries had been in, "Apparently it went faster than he thought though. The clean up was terrible, took him days to get the shelving upright again."

Yan blinked as Jack took off for the car.

Shit.

Another cat.


	83. NOT Dobby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://postimages.org/)

"Well?"

Ianto looked at the blob in Jack's cupped hands and frowned, leaning closer, "Is it…shit. It looks like a little chick fallen from its nest or something."

"Just a kitten" Jack was gushing as the little thing resembling a hairless rat opened its eyes and looked up at him.

"Looks like Dobby the house elf" Ianto muttered as he canted his head and definitely saw the alien-like features that had fooled old Archie, "Pretty eyes though."

"Yeah, really reminds you of the sea in the Bahamas, right?" Jack gushed, "Isn't he sweet?"

"Er…not to cold? He looks…."

The scream was sudden and piecing as Ianto calmly placed his fingers in his ears and watched Dahlia have a mental breakdown at the sight of the Sphinx kitten. She took a ragged breath and her hands shook as she plucked the poor creature from her son's hands and held it to her breasts, Ianto seriously wondered if it was about to be plopped into the cleavage like a bantam hen sitting on her chick.

"Poor baby, where's his fur gone!" She demanded, "If one you boys shaved the poor thing I will put you over my bloody knee, see if I don't. You cruel shits!"

"It's a breed of cat for people with allergies" Ianto sighed, rolling his eyes, "They are bred to be hairless."

"How barbaric" Dahlia gasped, her eyes wide with horror, "Poor babies. They must get so cold, I feel the poor wee mite shaking. Shivering, poor baby."

Ianto resisted the urge to point out it was probably bloody terrified by her ranting but instead he smiled sweetly, "Might need a wee cardie then Hearthwarmer, imagine the wee thing in a wee jumper? One to match Lin's? Awwww."

Her eyes filled her face as she stared at him, then she was off, "I don't know what wool I have I might need to go shopping, I can't leave him though, maybe a trial one out of scraps, to see if I have the pattern right…"

She was gone, running for the cottage as the kitten did indeed disappear into her cleavage.

"Crafty" Jack said with narrowed eyes "That will keep her busy for ages."

"Yep" Ianto popped the p, "Rhia and that fella of hers stole our baby while you were out too. Byrd and Gray are over there alternating between guarding Lin and eating everything in sight."

Jack grunted as he flopped into a chair, "We can still scare Owen with it, right?"

"Jack"

"I mean, I got him. Technically he's MY bald weirdo thingee" Jack muttered.

"You. Me. This house. All alone." Ianto tried again and Jack flopped his head back to stare at the ceiling.

"Buster. No. Ralph" Jack sniggered then made a noise like a cat sicking up, "Yeah. Ralph."

Ianto sighed.

"I want to fuck you now"

Jack grunted… flew from the chair and charged up the stairs, then back down to look at his mate still seated, "What, wanna carry too?"

Ianto squealed as he was seized and thrown over his husband's shoulder and carried up the stairs and he roared with glee as he was thrown from the doorway onto the bed.

"What did you call him downstairs?" Jack asked, panting as he wrestled with his trousers, toppled, hit the bedside table, groaned and grunted on the floor as he rolled around a bit, slithered to the edge of the bed, griped the covers and levered himself on the corner of the bed, grunted and kicked his feet frantically as the trousers hung around his ankles like an alien being trying to attack.

"Dobby, you know? Harry Potter?" Ianto said and Jack nodded, enthusiastically balling up a sock and biffing it at the basket, watching it sail out the open window, shrugging and pulling at the other one …rolling onto his back… the sock released and he punched himself in the face, yodelled and then flopped back on the bed, starfishing naked.

"There ya go. Have at me!" he declared and Ianto calmly finished undressing and straddled him, looking down as if measuring him.

"No."

"Huh?"

"You can't call him Dobby the House Elf" Ianto said calmly.

"Bumpy bumpy bump bump" Jack said as he energetically bucked beneath his love, "I'll call him whatever ya like, do you ride or do I take it like a man?"

Ianto sighed as his mate showed his attention span.

"I think today….I shall fuck you so hard your head bashes the headboard!" Ianto said and Jack made a strangled noise of glee as he pulled a pillow from Ianto's side to buffer against the wood, his mouth open as he panted for it to begin and his leg rose.

Ianto smiled as he leaned down and kissed his mate, "Cariad, you are a silly bugger sometimes."

"I love you" Jack said dopily, "Bumpy bump bump now?"

"Silly, daft Cariad" Ianto crooned as he palmed Jack's cock and balls, rolling them in his fingers and tugging gently. "No Bumpy bump...um... Thud, Wham and Wreaking"

Jack was making little whimpering noises as Ianto took him to that place where only bonded mates can go, their joined pleasure making them both go blind for a moment as they writhed in the bedding, sweaty, hot and almost at supernova strength, their combined orgasm taking their strength and they lay boneless as they shuddered in each other's arms, grunting and moaning happily.

"I am going to call him Archie" Jack decided after a while of silence and Ianto started to snigger.

He did look a bit like an old man.

Just needed a little tartan hat.


	84. Chicken leg

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://postimages.org/)

Archie sat on the cushion like some Egyptian god, his almond eyes almost black now as he slowly blinked at the child whose face was mere millimetres away.

Ianto entered the room and froze, his baby teetering as he struggled to pull himself closer to the kitten until their noses met and he squealed with glee.

Archie blinked again.

"Oh my gods" Ianto whispered to himself, "The little shit is crawling already? Gods, I am so dead."

"What's that love?" Jack said as he slipped past shaking the bottle in his hands, "You know I...AARRGGHHHHHHHHH"

Jack was running, the bottle thrown at the sofa where it bounced and Ianto deftly caught it, Jack scooping up the baby off the floor to dance about with glee, "My star, oh gods, my wee star. Did you crawl all that way? Did you?"

Ianto took a deep breath and looked down at the cat that canted his little weird head, his wrinkled face twitching with amusement at the big twat and Ianto nodded his silent agreement.

"Botty?" Ianto suggested and Lin threw himself about with vigour as he roared for what he had missed entering the room seconds earlier. A greedy wee chap this one, like his dad for sure.

Jack settled and plugged the bottle in, "My wonderfully clever wee man. See? told you that cat would be great, already has our baby crawling"

Ianto looked down again at the kitten who had raised a chicken legish limb to lick dispassionately at itself as if it tasted as sour as it looked. Ianto was becoming more and more aware of the lack of humour in this one. Quite...sarcastically inclined.

"Hey" Byrd chirped as she entered and threw herself on the floor, looking at the cat, "Hello Archie me old...date."

Jack laughed as Ianto rolled his eyes, the puns were a new thing between father and child as they thought up titles for the cat. Archie rolled his head to stare at the child and a slow blink showed his lack of mirth.

Byrd rolled onto her back and looked at the ceiling "Uncle and Aunty are at the Batty House looking at what Luc had done. They moving into it soon?"

Jack made a little squeaking noise at the mention of Owen and looked excitedly at the cat. Ianto resisted the urge to face palm at what was about to be an epic carry on.

"Darling sweetest daughter of mine" Jack crooned with syrup on top "Can you go get your uncle to come here? Tell him Lin is colicky?"

"Lie?" she gasped with horror, her little hand flittering to her chest with wide eyes as she camped. Yep, both kids channelled their bloody father. He grinned as she sniggered and took off, pausing in the doorway to point at the kitten, "Stay!"

The kitten paused it's grooming, staring at the doorway with its little pink tongue still poking out and then it calmly rose and regally shook itself as if the insult of being spoken to like it was the stupid dog had contaminated it and Ianto watched it stalk under the sofa as Jack squeaked.

"No, oh no, wait, er, kitty kitty, er, sweetums bum" Jack was frantically trying to get it out while his son's growl told him that if he moved the bottle he was a dead dad.

Owen entered and looked around, seeing the baby and he frowned, "How bad is it?"

As he spoke Archie deemed Jack's apology worthy and stalked out between Ianto's feet to stare at the new person in the room. He had not seen this one before. Small, compact and rat faced. He wasn't sure he liked him as he stalked over with his little piece of string that passed as a tail held out behind him to sniff disgustedly at Owen's jeans.

Owen was frozen to the spot, his mouth open as he panted with excitement, watching the creature now sit and slowly look up his body as if measuring him, pausing the stare as the trembling hand, then move up to lock eyes.

Totally black almond orbs stared out from the oval face and wrinkled alien-like features topped with two enormous ears like radars.

They regarded each other.

Archie grew bored and his head swivelled like an owl's to look back at Ianto as if to say, what the fuck is this thing?

"Owen, this is Archie. Archie this is Owen" Ianto said with incredible calm, his need to pee starting as he held back the giggling that threatened and Owen gaped at the cat again.

"Archie?"

"Yep" Byrd said as she settled by her father to watch the Snot drink, "That's Archie."

"Shit. I thought he was really Scottish" Owen said and they all looked at him blankly.

"Well, hi Archie. Did you get that file I sent last month on the Vermitin?" Owen asked politely, "I wasn't' sure if you have any info on them or not."

Ianto couldn't take it and rose, "excuse me."

He made it to the kitchen before the laughter started, holding the back of a chair as he screamed with mirth.

Owen thought it was the Director of Torchwood Institute in Scotland.


	85. Weird Shit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://postimages.org/)

"Well I didn't know what to think" Owen spluttered angrily, still pissed that Jack had got him so easily, "You said he was over a hundred and eighty odd years because some device or something had stopped him aging, I thought maybe he had shrunk like some people do or some weird shit!"

"Weird shit" Byrd repeated slowly and Ianto growled deep in his throat as Owen was reminded of the slip.

"Ah. That's a grown-up saying love, you are only allowed to say that if you have money in your pocket" Owen said quickly and she frowned as she felt her pockets and came up empty.

"Bum."

"So...it's one of those hairless cats?" Owen asked, now interested as his medical mind clicked in, "Can I touch it?"

"The amount of times I've heard that...ow!" Jack squeaked as Ianto slapped the back of his head and growled again.

"Well, she's my daughter. I think soon enough she is going to learn that I'm pretty bad love" Jack defended himself as he rubbed his head and grinned sheepishly.

"Look, I feel the need to take some responsibility here, I did tell Jack what they were" Ianto sighed, "I had no idea he would get so excited about it, now did I?"

"Actually..." Owen took another look at the creature now nestled in a blanket in Jack's lap as he stroked is happily, "I think he's kinda cute. I mean...he looks bad arse!"

"I know" Jack gushed, "They get tall and spindly like something from the Jim Henson Workshop and their ears stay all funny too."

"Do you think his eyes will change colour?"

Ianto shook his head as he rose and walked out to find the children laughing as they chased Lucky about the garden, Luc's hat on his head as Luc sat and watched.

"Clever one him" Luc motioned with his cup of coffee at the dog, "Lets them get close and then....poof!"

"Yeah, he can keep them busy for ages and tires them right out" Ianto agreed.

"Where your bird?"

"She's inside trying to get her uncle in trouble as usual" Ianto replied as he settled with Luc to watch the older kids play, "You settled in?"

"She a good one."

"Yes, you need to take it gently, she had been badly treated and spooks easily" Ianto sighed.

"Yes, but she strong too" he nodded back, "I kill for her. No problem. She have strong babies, look at them. This a lovely hive."

"Yes it is" Ianto smiled and watched the dog let himself get caught and make fake yelps of horror as he was hugged and kissed, then wriggled free and ran with a child's shoe that had come off.

"I like the Owen." Luc said after a while of companionable silence, "He a little bugger with good heart. Be a good friend over there."

"Yes, he is fiercely loyal to those who love him" Ianto agreed, "His own childhood was unpleasant, his mother constantly told him he was a disappointment and she rejected him. He fluffs because deep down he is afraid she was right."

Luc made a noise deep in his chest and Ianto knew Owen had a new friend who would kill for him too.

Ianto patted the muscled thigh of the man who resembles a Norse God, and walked inside to find his sister at the lithe window watching them all outside, "Why didn't you come out."

"I knew you would come in" her face was flushed and she was nervous, "I want him in my room, how do I tell him I...shit. He is fantastic, you bastard prick-face, you knew....ah. He makes me feel all...¦."

"Moist?"

She slapped at him as he laughed and then she clasped her hands together, "You are a little prick, aren't you."

"I assume his is quite manly like the rest of him then" Ianto said dryly and she blushed more.

"He was just covertly asking me for you" Ianto said as he watched her closely, "He thinks you are strong and a good fit for him. He loves your children and I think he would love to make some with you."

"God, what?" her eyes bugged out.

"He thinks you are a wonderful mate" Ianto laughed, "He wants to settle. Not just shag, he sees you as his queen."

"Oh my god" she breathed.

"You know, I was just thinking out there that he looks like a god too" Ianto smiled as he turned to leave, "All yours. Nice bum too."

"Hey!" she yelled after him "Stop looking at his bum, that's mine!"

Ianto laughed as he watched her race after him and he ran out the door yelling over his shoulder, "I'm married not dead. You think Jack doesn't check it out too?"

"Oi!"

Ianto laughed all the way back to the house where his husband was on the floor with the kitten, his own bum held high as he crouched on all four with his face down level to croon softly at the naked kit.

Nice bum there too.


	86. thats what friends are for

Yan was pushing the pram along happily window shopping in the large mall as Owen and Jack hunted like they were on safari. Whatever this new drone was that Owen wanted to get Tosh for her birthday, he was determined to find one. Owen and Jack split up to cover the mall better so it was Owen that Yan was watching placidly, knowing Jack would probably give her blood pressure hell as he climbed shelving like a monkey to hunt in the stacks. Yan had seen him do it in the archives enough times to know it rarely ended well.

Yan saw Owen ahead and smiled as she changed course and as she drew near she saw that he was talking animatedly to an older woman who seemed to be looking at him with open dislike.

"I told you, I have a lot on" Owen said as he tried to step away.

"All the money that bloody medical school cost and you can't even afford one afternoon with me" she said sadly, "After all I did for you."

Owen froze, turning slowly to face her, "Say that again."

"What?"

"Say that again Ma, that bit about all you did for me" Owen stepped into her face, "Come on. Tell me what you ever fucking did for me other than shit me out!"

"I am your mother, how dare you speak to me like that" she said with a wavering voice, her jowls wobbling with emotion, "When your father died I had nothing"

"Nothing" Owen said softly, "You had his bank balance, the two town houses plus the Spanish villa. All those collectable cars and let's not get into the coin collection shall we. Tell me Ma, what did I get when Dad died?"

She looked at him silently.

"I know" Owen said as if it was a sudden thought "I got boarding school, not one of those like in the movies where they do panty raids and shit, no. I got one with nuns and straps and cold fucking porridge for tea. Yeah. You gave me a lot. What did you tell me when you shoved me into the taxi, not even caring enough to take me there? Oh yah, 'you are my son and for that I have to love you but as a person you are unpleasant and I do not want you in my life' right?"

"I was devastated when your father died" she defended, "I needed time for me."

"His name was Harvey not 'me' Ma" Owen sighed, "And he comforted you well enough to run out on you with some of that money. Think I don't know what your toy boy did? He told you to get rid of me, write me off. You never even sent a Christmas or birthday card. Not since I was eight fucking years old. Do you even know when my birthday is?"

"I was there" she spluttered. "I bore you!"

"Yeah? You bore me too Ma" Owen canted his head, "I sometimes wonder. I mean. You never loved me, never wanted me. I was a disappointment from the word go wasn't I. Tell me Ma, did you pick me from the pound like all the other mongrels out there?"

p>"Owen I...You have such a nasty mouth" she suddenly changed as she sneered at him, "You always took after him with your snivelling demands for affection, attention. What about me. Do you have any idea what is it like to suck a cock twice your age? I deserved that money for having to fuck him and pretend I liked it, god. You think I wanted you? Getting fat, saggy breasts for what. A little weasel faced shit like him."

"Well now" Yan said angrily, "That is no talk for the presence of a child!"

Owen spun to look at her with surprise, her coiffed hair perfect as usual and the pretty dress hugging ever so delicately as she looked like she had just stepped out of a photo shoot for perfume or something, his face still showing his hurt.

"Owen, darling" Yan purred softly, "I saw this lovely necklace"

Yan's fingers danced over the diamond necklace Jack had gifted her on the birth of their child and she knew it was real, as did his mother as her eyes widened at the dripping wealth on the pretty blonde's neck, "You don't mind that I got it do you love? You did say I could have anything."

Owen blinked as Yan's eyelashes fluttered and she leaned in to kiss his cheek, "My lovely daddy. Would you take our wee star over to look at the waterfall? I don't want to get too close, my hair will frizz."

Owen finally caught on and grinned happily, "Sure thing sweetheart."

As he started to walk away Yan called after him, "I might get the earrings to match, only another fifteen grand!"

Then Yan looked down her nose at Owen's mother, looking her up and down with distaste and huffed, "Look I don't know who you are but we gave at the shelter where we helped feed the homeless. Do move along, I don't want my child to see such ...such....poverty. I am sure there are some Op Shops with better clothing than that, here."

Yan shoved some notes at her, "Go get something to eat and some nice warm shoes. It gets cold out there sleeping rough, it's OK. My husband is a doctor to royalty and we are rolling in it. You poor thing."

Yan then swanned after Owen to stand back and coo, waving to her wee chickie.

Owen was so made up at the display that he puffed like a bantam. Ianto would never have had the balls to be so rude to an elderly lady and lie like that but as he looked at his mate in female form he finally got it. He understood. This was Ianto's alter ego. Still Ianto but without the butler filter.

Owen turned and watched his mother still standing there staring at the money Yan had shoved at her and he started to snigger.

Gods that was a mic drop for sure!

Fucking epic!


	87. Comfort of an afternoon

Jack had called to say a ship had gone down. No survivors. A curt, emotionless snap to tell him he needed to change out of his wet clothing.

Yan had stood looking at the phone for a while, then moved up the stairs with purpose.

Ianto met Jack at the door, almost naked but for suspenders and silk stocking ...oh yeah...and hard, and Jack slammed him right into the wall as he kicked the door shut behind him.

Jack's tongue was hot and firm in Ianto's mouth, and Ianto moaned shamelessly as Jack roughly shoved his knees apart and slotted his thigh between them. Ianto rocked his hips against Jack's thigh, his cock leaving a damp patch of pre-cum on Jack's pants.

"Where are they?" Jack gasped as Ianto rubbed against him, the silky underwear teasing more on the male body than it would have on the femaleâ€¦and Ianto knew it.

"Rhia's for the entire afternoon" Ianto purred, fluttering his eyes.

Jack dragged him to the bedroom and gave Ianto exactly what he wanted, thrusting his tongue into Ianto's tight hole as Ianto writhed and fisted his hands in the sheets. Ianto whimpered helplessly when

Jack pulled back, wriggling his hips at the loss, but Jack didn't leave him wanting for long. He sank his slicked cock into Ianto's body in one long stroke, and Ianto let out a strangled, wordless shout.

Jack pulled him roughly to his knees, hand tight on his shoulder as he drove his cock in with punishing force. Ianto sobbed brokenly. "God's yes, that's perfect...fuck, Jack, more."

"You want more?" Jack growled, snapping his hips forward.

Ianto shuddered, his thighs quivering. "Fuck..."

"Tell me you want more," Jack said, his voice pitched low.

"I want...fuck, yes, I want more," Ianto gasped.

Jack's hand slid from Ianto's shoulder to rest on the back of his neck.

"Tell me how much you love my cock in you."

"Oh god," Ianto sobbed. "Yes, I love it... _fuck,_ I love your cock. More, please..."

Jack grabbed Ianto's throat in one hand and slid the other around to rest on his chest. He pulled Ianto up until he was kneeling, his back pressed to Jack's chest as Jack squeezed his neck lightly, just the barest hint of pressure.

"You're going to be good for me, aren't you?" he murmured, his lips hot on Ianto's ear.

Ianto's body felt battered and limp, filled to the brim with emotion and sensation, so full he might burst.

"Yes," he whispered, leaning forward into Jack's grip on his neck. "I'll be good for you, so good. So good for you, Daddy."

He didn't even have time to be mortified, because Jack groaned loud and long, his hips jerking hard and his cock throbbing in Ianto's arse as his rhythm fell completely apart, reduced to nothing but force and hardness and heat, filling Ianto and possessing him.

Jack's palm was a burning brand on Ianto's neck, hot and perfect, and the words just didn't stop. "Please, yes, Daddy, give me more...fuck, I want it, I want...harder, harder, yes, give it to me...fuc...”"

Jack came with a ragged shout, his cock impossibly hard and his hand pressing so tight against Ianto's chest that it forced the air from his lungs. He dropped his hand to Ianto's cock and started stroking him roughly. "That's it, that's perfect...be a good boy and come for me."

And just like that, Ianto was coming so hard his vision went white, Jack's hands on his neck and his cock, and Jack's words echoing in his ears. His orgasm seemed to go on forever, his brain detaching from his body and floating away on endless waves of sensation.

The two of them collapsed heavily, and Ianto made a face as he landed in the wet spot, but the larger part of him just didn't care. Jack rolled off him with a groan, gasping for breath.

As Ianto's racing heart slowed to a reasonable pace, he chewed on his lip, venturing a glance over at Jack. Jack's arm was thrown over his eyes, his lips parted and his chest shining with sweat.

"So..." Ianto said, hesitant. "Was that...okay?"

"It's...I don't really want to talk about it."

"So...¦that's a yes," Ianto said with a smirk.

"It's an 'I don't want to talk about it.'" Jack said firmly, his arm still resting solidly over his eyes.

Ianto chuckled, slithering closer to him on the bed and winding his arm around his waist. That was fine; they didn't need to talk about it.

Ianto would just be the one doing the talking anyway.

Talk about the kids, the room that needed repainting, the pots of colour to be moved from the shade, the cat that needed de-sexing.

Anything and everything. Nothing.

Normal, everyday family stuff.

All Jack wanted to hear.


	88. weekender?

"You are such a disappointment"

"Your father and I planned you, did you know that? God we tried so hard to have a baby and look what we got. Look at you. The best years of my life and I missed out. My friends were gong ot parties, having fun and I had to look after you. Whinging and wailing. God, what a disappointment you were. So, unattractive and snotty all the time. Weedy and needy, that's what you were. A horrible little runt that I can never look at with anything but remorse. I am your mother. I produced this. God, what did I do wrong?"

"I am you mother so I am expected to love you but if we are being honest here...I can't stand you and I will never forgive you for ruining my life!"

.

.

.

.

Owen surged out of the bedding, crying out as if in pain and Tosh reached for him, soothing and crooning as she held him tightly against her, his tears wetting her nightgown as he wept for his mother. Tosh held him and wished the bitch a slow horrible death, preferably with bugs involved.

Next morning she headed across the lawn to the other house, glad to place her babies into the room where Dahlia was already gushing over them.

Archie was sitting in one of the children's armchairs that had apparently been chosen as his and his head swivelled as she entered and watched the babies get taken from their pram and placed on the blanket before he rose to regally bless them each with a nose bump.

That done he returned to his chair and sat regally observing.

_An Emperor with no clothes seated on his mighty throne._

"That cat is a riot" she said as she settled at the table and watched Ianto pull some little pies from the oven that were clearly for the children racing about in the garden.

"He certainly thinks he is" Ianto agreed, puling out a chair and sitting then motioning for her to pour the tea if she liked. She did. Ianto's china was lovely and it felt grand to be Mother.

She told Ianto about the nightmares and Ianto frowned as he listened, nodding now and then before sighing softly.

"The hard part is that she is so well thought of in society" Tosh sighed, "She gives to causes, is active in the charities and everyone sings her praises. Like she is two different people."

"Many of us are" Ianto quipped and she smiled at him.

"Sometimes a mother can be like that. More maternal to someone else's kids than her own" Ianto shrugged, "I don't know what to do for him either. Poor little fella. He needs his sleep or he will never grow."

Tosh snorted, "Oi! That's my wee fella!"

"Maybe it's all the changes that have shaken him up. Then seeing her didn't help. Maybe he needs a change of scenery, how about we all head to the seaside or something?" Ianto frowned, "Maybe a weekend away? Andy and Rhys can man the fort, you and Owen come with Me and Jack. Just us and our kids. Actually, I will see if Byrd wants to come, she might want to stay. Just the babies?"

"Really?" she asked with surprise as Gray and Byrd thundered past, Ianto calling out to them.

"Tosh and Owen are going away for the weekend and me and Daddy might go with them. So you both want to come or stay here?" he asked and they seemed to consider then Gray screwed his face up.

"Luc is going to build a fire pit and roast a pig" Gray informed him, "I am allowed to help."

"Well that sounds like more in than a long car ride for sure" Ianto smiled, "Byrdie?"

She stared at her father Dam long and hard and then asked, "Where will you go?"

"We've not decided" Tosh answered, "Maybe a lodge? Somewhere we can have a fire to sit by and talk."

"Tramping?"

"No."

"Swimming?"

"No love"

"Bugger that then" Byrd snorted, "I'm cooking a pig."

"Well...sorted" Ianto shrugged at Tosh who watched with awe as the children started running again.

"She is so advanced for her wee self" she said with wonder.

"Yes, going to be a problem teenager, I see Jack going bald several times a day" Ianto rolled his eyes, "The resets will be bothersome as each grey hair will be a moment's silence."

Tosh laughed as she slapped at her friend, "As if either of you will ever go grey."

"well, he would look distinguished I think" Ianto said, then snorted, "Who am I kidding. He would be fuckable bald."

Tosh laughed and nodded.

"We can go away, have some bonding and remind him that he had family. Is loved and important" Ianto assured her, "Don't worry love, he just needs a shake off."

Tosh smiled as she watched Ianto start to make a list.

A weekend away 'glamping' sounded lovely.


	89. besties come in all shapes and sizes

Ianto looked up as Owen entered and placed his baby into Ianto's arms.

"Hero won't sleep and he is waking the wee princess with his grumbling" he explained as he walked over to the refrigerator and opened it, then started rooting around in it for something to eat. Ianto looked down at the wee baby who blew a raspberry to show his own displeasure in the situation. Apparently Owen's nightmares were disturbing the entire house.

"Lin is bored in there because Byrd and Gray are next door making Paper Mache" Ianto told the baby "Would you like to go see him?"

Ianto carried the baby through to the elaborate jungle gym on the floor and laid him next to Lin, watching little hands clasping as they greeted happily, Lin's eyes roving for the wee girl. He then saw that she was not there and focused once more on his friend, babbling as he pointed at a hanging toy.

Hero turned his head to coo his agreement that it was really bright.

Lucky wandered in and walked over to sniff the wee pups, wondering if they were warm and his nose told him they were fine enough so he jumped on the ottoman and watched over them as they played.

"Owen? What's got you all antsy these days" Ianto asked as he watched the man build an epic sandwich that Jack would be proud of.

"Nothing, just silly bloody dreams" Owen sighed, "Can't get rid of them. That cow of a woman does pick her times to pop into my life."

"I am sorry Owen" Ianto said softly, "You are a better person than she could have ever hoped for. Look at your children, our friendship, this family. Owen, you will be a better father than she could be a mother. You know that, right?"

"Yeah" Owen slumped, "I just...she's there like a fucking voice in my head telling me I am a failure."

"Well I love you, crazy brother of mine and although we have both come from a harsh start, we are definitely better people than those who made us" Ianto soothed as he followed Owen to the living room to watch the babies as they ate, the half sandwich slid onto a separate plate sweet. Ianto valiantly took a bite and politely hummed as he placed it back on the plate, then settled to watch Owen devour his and the rest of Ianto's absently as he watched the babies still and fall asleep.

"Ready for the camping trip?" Ianto asked and Owen hummed happily, the thought of spending the weekend on an adventure with his friends exciting him and it suddenly occurred to Ianto that Owen had never had fun like this as a child.

Well he was about to learn the finer art of camping.

Whether he wanted to or not.

Ianto yawned and stretched out, pulling Owen to him and although surprised he did not argue. Ianto rubbed Owen's back as they snuggled and after a while Owen started to fall asleep. Ianto kept humming softly as he looked over at the little ones asleep with little snores and a cat or two tucked in against them.

When Dahlia came I they were all asleep, two friends cuddled together both on the floor and on the sofa.

Blankets all round.

She settled to watch them sleep and soon her lap was full of kitties. She could hear Jack's laughter as he played outside with the children, Gray's laughter an echo to his big brother's and she smiled softly.

What a lovely family she had.

After a while she rose to start the tea, calling Tosh to ask is she was coming across to join them or if she was cooking for her and Owen. That sorted she set the extra places at the table for them and hummed happily as she checked the bread cooling on the bench.

She looked out the window at the idiots all rolling around on the wet ground and clucked her tongue as she wondered about grass stain then saw Gray lean down to lift Byrd up, his hands stroking and smoothing her hair back as he kissed her forehead.

Dahlia looked back into the living room and went over what she had been told of the poor man whose mother caused so much harm and she sighed.

Two little boys who needed a mama.

Dahlia settled once more to watch over them both as they slept.

They had her.

Owen would know the love of a good mother.

Whether he was ready or not.


	90. Into the swing of camping?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://postimages.org/)

The spot was idyllic.

Jack and Ianto unpacked the gear into the wee log cabin as Owen and Tosh explored, their babies asleep in the front packs.

Lin was dead to the world as his Taddy placed him down and decided to get changed.

"Cariad?"

Jack stopped placing the fruit in the bowl as he looked up and grinned as Yan stepped from their room next to the larger one for the others, her hair neatly tied back with her track suit finely hugging her curves, "Let's go check this trail out before the rains come, I want to break these in."

"I'll carry Lin" he offered as she nodded and laced up her new trainers.

They walked casually along the well laid out track, their hands clasped and they looked at the lovely leaves changing colour as the lake water reflected the vista like a mirror in the still afternoon air.

"There is a little pooled area nearby" Jack said as he tried to remember what the guide had told him when he collected the leys, "A little place for ...oh gods there."

They stopped as they saw the blanket laid out and two little ones in the safety of their front packs snoozing while their parents laughed in the water. Clothing was strewn about and Yan opened her mouth to warn Jack but he bulldozed in without a second thought. "Hey guys!"

Tosh squealed and dove under as Owen stood, the water cascading off him as he looked around with confusion, then seeing Yan busting a gut up on the path, her legs crossed and her knees bent as she tried not to pee herself laughing with her baby in her lap.

"CANONBALL!"

Tosh screamed as Jack descended, his face changing as he realised he was diving into a naked wee skinny dipping party for two.

OK, so he was naked too.

So?

Didn't mean he expected anyone else to be and Owen was spluttering as Tosh laughed and struggled for the shore, Yan running to grab up a towel and help cover her friend, their combined laughter like bird song.

"I am so sorry" Jack was horrified, "Oh Tosh. It's like seeing my kid sister having sex or something. No. NO. ERRGHHHHHH!"

Jack ran from the water waving his hands with disgust and Tosh squealed again, turning to cuddle against Yan and baby Lin who was wide awake watching his father with the widest eyes you can imagine in a wee bit.

"OH MY GOD!" Owen roared, "PUT IT AWAY!"

Jack swung to look at Owen with his hands on his hips, Hero Pose employed now he was over the shock and his large python slapped on his thigh a moment later.

"What" Jack grinned, "Jealous?"

"Wanker!" Owen spluttered, still trying not to let his eyes drop to what he knew was way too much for a normal person.

"Actually, I don't have to" Jack said coyly, his eyelashes fluttering, "My beloved wanks me."

Owen's scream was loud and harsh, the echo making the birds erupt from the trees with their own screeches of discord.

.

.

.

.

.

"Look, I said sorry" Jack repeated as Owen shoved his stick at the fire.

"You are just so fucking much!" Owen muttered, then sighed as his marshmallow plopped into the fire.

Ianto swapped sticks with him and Owen's face lit up as he saw the perfect marshmallow and he turned the stick, shoving it in his mouth as Ianto gaped, trying to remind him to blow on it first and Owen remembered as it burnt the roof of his mouth so he flicked it out and cursed, the marshmallow now in a slow arc at Jack who looked up from his own in time to catch it with his forehead.

Ianto watched Jack erupt from his seat and flap at his head, then Ianto rose and calmly walked around the fire pit, plucked the marshmallow from his husband's forehead and popped it into his own mouth.

Jack whimpered as he watched Ianto chew thoughtfully, his eyes twinkling with cheek.

"Ice in the icebox for the sodas" Ianto said as Jack blinked. "You can put a piece on the burn?"

"Oh!" Jack started, then moved to grab some as Owen sniggered.

"Owen, say sorry."

"What?"

The babies were asleep bar the one who pouted larger than Byrd as he was forced to face his Captain and apologise so he did it with his usual style.

"Sorry your incredibly huge fucking head caught my marshmallow"

Ianto shrugged.

Good enough.

For family.


	91. breathe in...breathe what the.....

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://postimages.org/)

"But I can't breathe"

Strangely it seemed nobody cared as they trudged along and it became apparent that this was his mantra, not a comment for discussion.

"I can't breathe."

Owen leaned against a tree and squinted up at the sun as it burst through the canopy like it was somehow seeking him out, his gaze falling to the rest of the family who were getting further away.

"I don't know how we are going to survive" he sighed as he pushed off and wondered if this is how it felt to be lost in the desert, all alone going slowly insane with the horror of it all. His friends and family leaving him to die a horrible death in a mire.

Oh god.

Owen screamed, leaping to one side while doing a weird yucky dance and Ianto was there, running while clutching the baby against him to stop too much shaking about with a look of 'Taddy Mode' and searching eyes for the danger.

"Owen?" Ianto said softly as he came along side, "What is it?"

"That!" Owen pointed and Ianto turned to look at the large carved tree trunk that resembled a man looking back at them. Like an old Totem.

"Oh Owen!" Ianto said happily, "Well done. That's the marker post to turn left, hey guys Owen found the marker!"

"Well done" Jack roared happily as he walked back, a twin on his chest as Tosh followed with another. Apparently Owen couldn't handle any form of extra weight at such a high altitude. They were....maybe eight metres above sea level?

Jack slapped Owen on the shoulder as he passed, looking up the mountain with glee as the goat path became clear, "Look. There we are. Here is the start. A lovely day for a walk!"

"The start? The start? What do you mean this is the start? What?" Owen turned and looked with horror as the path wound up into the fucking clouds like a bloody giant was up there ready to Fe Fi Fo and fucking Fum on their arses.

"Hurry up" Jack yelled back, "There's a lookout post about ten minutes up for our picnic."

Owen perked up at the thought of that backpack on Jack being opened and he took off, passing them all with ease and Ianto canted his head as he considered the change of pace then turned to Jack, "Cariad?"

"Yes love?" Jack asked as he lovingly stroked the hair of the little girl asleep on his chest, her wee pout epic as he replaced her wee bobble hat Hearthwarmer had knitted for her.

"You did tell Owen why we drove through the gates and had to shut them again, right?" Ianto asked, his own blob dead to the world with little limbs rocking back and forth with his Dam's movement.

"Yeah. I said we are on a farm so we have to keep the livestock in" Jack said as he turned to check Tosh was OK with the little boy, smaller than his sister these days as his delicate little body showed him to be a dancer maybe.

"No, I mean...you did tell him there are goats in here with us?" Ianto clarified, "You know? Ahead on the path?"

A cry, a scream and then a yodel.

"Well, he'll never be a Heidi" Jack grimaced at the sound as Owen pounded towards them, his face pale and his mouth open as he continued to wail and the three little goats the size of Labradors followed, leaping and bouncing along gaily as they tormented the medic.

Owen passed them, still running and Ianto turned to look back as the goats blew through them like fighter jets, a larger noise making the group turn to see the Mama following her kids with her eyes wide and her hooves striking the dirt.

"Shit" Jack said inanely as he stood stock still watching.

"HEY!" Ianto yelled and the nanny goat skidded to a halt, dancing back to look at him and Ianto yelled again, still watching the goat, "Owen get back here and stop being a bloody baby."

Owen roared back up the path and stopped in front of Ianto, "I beg you goddamned pardon, did you see their horns?"

Ianto blinked, looked at the babies and back to Owen.

"Owen, they don't have horns."

Owen turned and looked, his posture changing as he examined them, "Huh. I thought they had horns."

The babies walked over to their mother and Owen followed them with his gaze, finally seeing the nanny and his hand rose, shaking as he pointed, "See? Horns."

"Ya Nancy" Ianto snorted, turning to continue walking as Owen slumped, still looking at the babies.

"They had fucking horns" he said to himself, "Little fuckers are wee loki clones or something. Tricking a man like that. Little shits."

The nanny stomped a foot at the one who had stolen her young and he squeaked at he took off up the path again, this time silently.

The Nanny took a mouthful of thistle and looked up the path after them with a quizzical air.

Weird little one that.

His Mama obviously didn't give him the tit enough.


	92. ring a Lin

The babies were alert and excitable as Ianto opened his backpack and revealed the bottles in their little warmers.

Hero snatched at his with animalistic growls resembling his father who was doing the same thing to Jack as the flask of coffee was waved about. Wee Kitty waited patiently for hers, her look of delight as she stroked Jack's chest showed she liked his heartbeat, so similar to Byrd's where her head also liked to rest.

Ianto placed his son down and checked his diaper as Lin looked up at the clouds with glee, waving at a bird as it passed and calling out softly. He loved animals. The goats had not followed them and Ianto hoped he would still be awake as they went back down so he could see them, sure his little brain would implode from seeing a new creature.

Jack looked over as the princess finally latched onto her bottle and watched as his son considered his, then accepted it. He grinned as he watched Ianto's' face soften to that one that was just for their offspring. A look of pure devotion that sometimes took his breath away.

"What is that smell?" Owen was sniffing the air.

"It was Lin but I've changed him now" Ianto said as he finished zipping the nappy bag closed, "All gone."

"No, not that. It like...a...funky sort of clean smell like when you've washed the loos."

Ianto blinked as he looked around.

"Pine?" He asked slowly, "Owen are you smelling pine trees over there?"

"That's it" Owen nodded, "gross. The whole place smells like a loo."

Jack started to snort and looked away as Ianto blinked again and looked at his son wondering if he should have gone in female form today so he could slap the sod but those trainers were still too new for a long hike and his hiking boots were so comfortable.

"The real problem had yet to be sorted" Jack said with that imperious air that warned Ianto that his beloved Cariad was about to be an arsehat.

"What?" Owen looked up with interest.

"Well. We have to get back down" Jack explained, "They will be waiting for us."

Owen's face fell as he gaped at Jack and Tosh let her hair fall forward to hide her growing mirth as Ianto rolled his eyes and sighed. Gods this was turning into one of those days.

"I know" Jack said perking up, "They already know Owen and he had proven that he means business. I think they are afraid of him!"

Ianto's head slowly swivelled to regard his Cariad, one eyebrow deployed.

"Owen. Remember the old stories about goat herders with their sticks and bells?" Jack asked, "The bloody bells on stick things the minstrels and folk singers use, right? Goat bell sticks!"

Now Ianto caught on and resisted the face palm that was itching so he took a deep breath and glanced over at a rapt Tosh.

"Owen!" Jack was so serious that there almost seemed real tension in the air, "You run ahead making noise and swinging a stick. We don't have bells so if you yell 'ring-a-ling' like one? They will shit themselves and run away. The babies will be safe."

Owen's eyes fell to the children.

"I bet they will be so scared of you we won't see a single one!" Jack sniffed and Owen rose.

"Right. A stick" Owen muttered as he started searching for one, going over to a tree and trying to break a branch, swinging off it like some tepid little monkey for a while before admitting defeat and then spying one nearby.

"Right" he swung it a few times, almost toppling over from the effort and Ianto now felt free to face palm.

Tosh was calmly adjusting the front pack and Ianto saw the small camera, the go-pro primed and ready as she gleefully readied herself for a show. Leaning down she whispered softly to her son "Watch daddy. He's gonna be a twat."

Hero craned his head to see, his mouth in a little 'O' as he watched his father prepare for battle.

Then he was off, a banshee wail that disintegrated into a weird song "Ring-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling-a-ring-a-ling-fucking-ling-ding-dong!"

Ianto started to giggle, swallowing to hide it as Jack pranced about with the baby's head held against his chest, "It's working, I hear them running, keep going you bloody marvel!"

"Ring-a-ling-a-ring-a-ding-dong-a-long-lin-bring-a-dong-long!" Owen was screaming now as he came into view, wielding the stick like a sword.

"Lin bring a dong long?" Ianto said softly, "Did he just tell my son to bring a large dong?"

Jack was laughing too much to answer, slapping at his knees as he doubled over and Kitty moved her head so she could watch upside down as her parental continued this weird display of stupidity.

"Ring-a-ring-a-dong!"

"I don't have the number for one" Ianto muttered and Jack roared again, slapping at Ianto now to make him stop.

"Ring-a-ling-ring-a-long-dong-ding-dangle!"

"Jack, I think he is having flashbacks to the waterhole mishap, he's talking about long dong ding dangles now" Ianto sighed, his face contorting as he tried to hold it back but finally his bray of laughter filled the air, a wonderful noise that had them all joining in, even the wee ones.

Well...not Owen but the other wee ones.

"Arsehats"


	93. Chapter 93

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [](https://postimages.org/)

The rain had held off after all, Owen and Jack eagerly building a fire pit as the 'womenfolk' watched, mind, Owen was not about to say that out loud as Yan and Tosh sat watching them while cheering them on.

Owen was insistent it be larger than the one last night so they could all cook their marshmallows at once and Jack had lamented fire cooked toast. It was going to be epic.

Yan made sure a fire extinguisher was nearby.

Just on case.

"You don't think that's sexist?" Tosh asked softly "Saying the 'men' would do it?"

"Are you kidding?" Yan snorted, "It's going to be a clusterfuck sweetie. I don't want a bar of it. Let them scratch their balls for a bit. Just be ready to step back if it explodes or something."

They snorted with mirth and settled back to watch the floor show, the babies asleep up on the veranda behind them in the balmy evening air. If things got too silly they could just beg off with 'fussy' babies and go inside. Yan was sure that bottle of wine was calling out for attention.

"Right!" Owen said as he yanked his pants up with pride, "Looks brills."

"Yeah, that's a lot of wood" Jack nodded, "Plenty of heat gonna come from that."

"Yeah" Owen grinned.

"I didn't know there was that much wood laying around" Yan said as she eyeballed it and then saw sap dripping from one of the branches. Oh. "Owen, were you pulling these off trees?"

"Just the spindly looking ones" he defended, "I could have cut one down I guess."

Tosh turned to ask Yan what the problem was and found she was already calmly sliding from the seat back towards the cabin and motioning her to follow, "I can hear one of the babies fussing Cariad, we will just do a bum check."

Yeah, sure" Jack called back without turning around as he stood hero pose next to Owen like Batman and wee Robin silhouetted in the last of the dying day's sunset.

"Be sure to get the height of it on" Yan hissed as Tosh took a photo and then they settled on the steps of the cabin with that wine and two long stemmed glasses. The white Sav sliding down gently.

"Why are we back here?" Tosh asked and Yan simply pointed. Tosh turned to see Owen approaching the wood pile with a fuel canister, tipping some gasoline over the wood with glee, and she held her breath and then let it out as it was clear he hadn't splashed himself as well.

An Owen shaped fireball would not end the day well.

Yan glanced over at the fire extinguisher and rose, moving it to the front of the SUV and then went back to sit and watch as Tosh looked from her to the mad minions.

"I don't have matches" Jack suddenly said, turning back to look at Yan, "Babe, do you have any..."

Owen stalked towards the pyre with a road flare and struck it into life, heaving it with a mighty yell...it plopped on the ground near it and Owen slumped, then cheered as the fuel soaked ground caught and the fire ran up to the wood and it all erupted into flame.

The menfolk then did the age old 'put the fire out' dance as they stomped on the spilt fuel now aflame and around their feet. Tosh covered her mouth with her hand as she snorted.

Yan stood and clapped, "Bravo Caraids, bravo! I give that an eight point five"

Owen turned to look at them with a grin, "Babe?"

"Nine" she choked out, "Definitely a nine love."

Owen turned back to bask in the fire, his pants getting another hook up.

Tosh went to rise but Yan caught her arm and shook her head, so they sat and waited some more.

The first pop was like a small explosion and Jack hit the ground, wriggling onto this back and reaching for the Webley he didn't have as Owen looked down at him with confusion. Then the next bang sprayed some embers into the air as the sap started to boil with the heat.

"Fuck" Owen said as his mouth fell open and Jack sat up in the dirt as he realised it was the fire and nobody was shooting at them. More pops then the entire thing went up like a fire cracker.

Tosh was now howling with mirth as Yan sighed and crossed her delicate ankles, "Cariad, the sparks are flying close to the SUV, they will cause hell with the paintwork."

Jack swung to look at his pride and joy as the first embers fell on the bonnet and he clambered to his feet with horror, yelling as he ran to save his Black Beauty from the pox. The fire extinguisher was fired with extreme malice at the hood, the air around the SUV and the fire pit making the entre place appear like the set for some medieval movie where all you needed was a dragon to emerge from the dying fire in this ethereal mist that smelt disgusting.

Jack stood panting as he looked triumphantly at Yan who raised her wine glass in salute.

Owen was unmoved as he surveyed their handiwork, the fire still popping and sizzling as it died at his feet.

"Epic"


	94. be prepared

"God this is good" Owen said around the third little mince pie he was cramming into his mouth.

"Well, I was a boy scout you know" Yan purred, "Be prepared."

"Were you?" Jack asked, the pie half way to his mouth a he imagined Ianto on a scout's uniform, his eyes glazing over.

"Good thing you have these little pies" Tosh said to Yan, "Did Mama make them?"

"No, I did" Yan smiled, "She likes to add curry and I prefer the natural gravy flavour of the lamb"

Another little shepherd's pie complete with swirled potato top was being chosen by Jack as Owen leaned back and patted his little stomach, signalling he was done.

"Fruit salad?" Yan offered, "Whipped cream and some meringues?"

"Ahhhhhh" Owen sighed happily as he nodded.

"I'll get it hon" Jack rose to do the plating up and they all settled back to eat their pudding with the quiet night softly encasing the cabin.

"Do we have to go back tomorrow?" Owen whined, "I'm having fun."

"Now Owen, we can't stay forever" Jack said gently, his face softening affectionately as he reached out to pat his head, "We can come back though. Maybe next month we can all come play, yeah? Rhys and Andy will help build a mighty fire pit. Imagine Luc, I bet he could rip a tree out of the ground!"

"We could cook one of those fucking goats" Owen muttered, "I bet Luc could catch one with his mighty muscles."

Yan looked over with surprise as she heard the first negative comment about their new family member and realised Owen was a bit intimidated.

"You know, he was asking about you" he said and Owen looked up with interest. "He asked if you have a brother. I explained you were an only child and he became quite upset. You see, they are large family groups and that is why his only child worries him so. He wants to be your friend but is not sure how to go about it. He finds you quite hard to read. Their kind are so open. I bet he would love to learn how to shoot, I don't think he has ever learnt how to fire a gun. Mind, you have that bow and arrow set up, remember? You never play with it. I bet his eyes would bug out. They use traditional weaponry like that."

"Really?" Owen canted his head as the expensive hunting bow he purchased and never fired was brought to mind, "It can fire right through an engine blood. High tensile steel and those pulleys mean the smallest of tension can pull the entire thing into..."

Yan waved a hand, "You don't have to convince me. I was impressed when you showed me. I bet Luc will want one the same. Just like yours. He will be jealous."

Owen puffed now, "Yeah?"

"Definitely. I see you two off hunting in the wilds, bringing back meat for the fire. Cooking it on sticks and talking about the hunt, maybe even eating the heart and gross shit" she assured him and Owen looked at Jack for confirmation.

"They do eat the heart of their kills, yeah" Jack nodded, "I like that. Maybe I should get one too. We can do an overnighter."

Tosh looked over at Yan with wide eyes and she shook her head gently to assure her friend that it would never happen then answered her husband, "Yes, but you can't leave me and Tosh alone here overnight. The noises and things. You know I need you to cling to or I won't feel safe."

Eyelashes fluttering ensued as she coyly smiled at her Cariad and Jack puffed his chest out, "Yah. I know, I can't sleep without your heartbeat anyway. Nah. Day trip out, we can focus on the fire at night then."

Owen nodded his agreement and both men gleefully stared into the flames of the cabin's safe little fireplace while contemplating their 'knightly adventure' and Tosh smiled as Yan topped off her wine glass.

"Rhys might not want to go" Yan said after a while, "He will want to stay with the babies, he would pine like mad. Me Tosh and Rhys can stay here and wait for you to return."

"Yeah, me, Jack, Andy and Luc" Owen nodded, "Sounds good."

"And Gray" Yan said softly, "He will need teaching in the ways of the menfolk."

Tosh rose to check the babies and Yan followed, Tosh turning to her, "Are you sure they would be safe doing that?"

"Tosh. Come on. Gray will kill something within five minutes of leaving here with that slingshot of his" Yan sniggered, "The blood will make Andy ill, then Luc will insist on butchering it and Owen will get disgusted with the mess he will make, Jack will insist on smearing themselves with the blood and they will come back with that as the only kill for the day as the smell of the blood will alert everything in a ten mile radius that there are hunters about."

"Are you sure?" she asked.

"Positive. Gray will probably wear the pelt of the poor thing like a meat helmet as Luc crows for him" Yan giggled, "They will never mention it again!"


	95. messy

OK, so you shouldn't tempt the gods, right?

This went through Ianto's mind as he knelt by the tub scrubbing Gray's hair, the boy still clutching the rabbit's tail as he gushed about the cool hunt.

Yeah.

Jack had called the 'boys' and the hunt had happened that next day while Tosh giggled uncontrollably at Ianto whose eyebrows were meeting as he stood listening to the wind, wondering if he should have gone after them.

Rhiannon and Dahlia had cleverly claimed the children and stayed behind at home, Byrd putting up a little resistance but then calming as she realised she would be able to boss the others around without Grey to temper her mood.

The only comfort the fact that Rhiannon will be dreaming of smothering the child with a pillow right about now as he knelt on the cold tiles.

"It just evaporated" Gray gushed, "Like...boom and ..whoosh...it disintegrated. Gods, Tadda, it was awesome!"

Ianto smiled as he leaned in and kissed the boy gently, his affection for this child overwhelming.

"I never knew a gun like that could do so much damage" Gray was still enamoured "Where did Uncle Luc get it from?"

"I have no idea, don't worry Daddy is asking the same..." Ianto stopped speaking as a large boom rattled the window from outside and Gray roared as he stood up in the bath water, the bubbles running down his thin body as he tried to clamber out.

"Them buggers are firing it without me!" he cried running out stark bollocks naked to see what they had disintegrated now.

Ianto let his head fall against the edge of the bath.

With his luck probably one of the SUVs.

Ianto emptied the bath and then calmly went out to find the naked boy wrestling on the ground with Owen, both of them an even match as Jack and Luc egged them on from the sidelines.

Rhys was standing back with Andy, their eyes wide as they held babies, little eyes wide as well and Tosh was giggling on the top step with babies as well, Ianto plucking his from her and cuddling him as he settled on the step.

"What was it this time?"

"Well it was supposed to be a bird but if you look you can see that tree over there?" Tosh pointed and Ianto looked, seeing a hole in the trunk that a man's head would fit through easily.

"Nice" Ianto said dryly, "A window."

Tosh giggled dome more, then shoved him, "Maybe they can cut it down and it can be a big picture frame or something."

"stop it!" he scolded, "One of them will hear you and I am sure the chainsaw is in the back of the SUV."

Tosh giggled some more, totally enjoying this wee holiday.

Best ever.

"Jack?" Ianto called out after it became clear Gray was choking Owen out, "Lunch love?"

They all scampered towards him and he was reminded of those little dinosaurs in the Jurassic Park movie, their arms in front and their mouths wide, Gray naked and Owen covered in dirt.

"Gray, if you are finished playing with Uncle Owen can you go get dressed?" Ianto asked calmly, "Cariad, can you pull the tables out and get the chairs? We will eat on the patio, yeah?"

Tosh followed him in, "How can you be so damned calm?"

"Mental skills" he answer calmly, "each time I want to shoot one of them I simply send an image to Jack of those shoes I want, that purse we saw on line or that sweet little kitty in the rescue page of the news paper. Don't worry, it calms him right down."

Tosh slapped at him as she giggled, not believing him for a second.

"OK, maybe I like seeing him so childlike too" he finally admitted, "He is old. Been here forever and shall be here for so much longer than that. I like that he can still be a twat. He does need to keep that or what will the future be for him?"

"But he won't be alone" Tosh reminded him, "He will have you."

Ianto looked at her and rolled his eyes, "Well, that is a given whether he likes it or not. Gods, he can't' even coordinate his clothes!"

She smiled softly as Ianto blustered about with the food, his own happiness thrumming as he fed the troops.

Gray was watching Luc with beady eyes, still not trusting him around that gun and Ianto leaned forward in his chair, "Luc. Where did you get that gun?"

They all stopped eating to look at Luc as he shrugged, "Market."

"What?"

"Swapped the fish for it" Luc explained, "The blue skinned men here on wedding party before. You know, like the movie with the man who lost a tooth."

"Huh?"

"The tiger."

"The Hangover?"

"Yeah!" Luc pointed, "That thing."

"A stag do" Ianto finally got it, "They were having a stag party before a bonding?"

"yea!" Luc grinned as he nodded, "They like my fish. I swapped for the gun. They had lots, going to Summernot Work to hunt those nasty little creatures. Summerstar Beasts. The ones with the nasty little whines that make your skin crawl. They boom real good with a big gun."

Ianto laughed as he agreed.

He knew of the Summerstar weasel things.

Bitchy wee things like rodents.

Gods, they must make a mess.


	96. Another kind of messy

"No one will see us." Jack undid the first of the brace clips and smiled wickedly at her as he shrugged off his clothing. "These bushes will hide us baby."

Yan swept her hands across Jack's collarbones to his other shoulder and he closed his eyes at the light, sensual caress.

If he could concentrate anyway.

Yan pulled the thick blanket from her shoulders and dropped it so it lay beneath their feet. Jack lit the two lamps he had placed there earlier in the day, hoping this wee pocket of quiet could be used in the moonlight, wanting to see the flames lick across his beloved's face. He had imagined Ianto there on the ground beneath him but Yan not exactly a second choice.

Their flames burst into life, lighting the darkness with a warm glow. Yan looked at them all and then back at him. She moved fluidly and her clothes disappeared.

Two could play this game.

Her dress was gone in an instant, shortly followed by her flats and then her underwear. She gasped and covered herself coyly as if she hadn't just dropped it like it was hot.

Jack covered them both, masking them from mortal eyes, and pulled her flush against his bare body. He kissed her and ran his hands down her sides to her hips. Her skin was warm beneath his fingers and she shivered when he stroked her waist and then skimmed his hands around to her bottom. The feel of her belly against his hips stirred his cock.

He was about to kiss her again when she dropped to her knees in front of him and took his still-hardening length into her hot mouth. Blood surged through him and his cock twitched as she sucked it to hardness. It ached and he ached with it, wanting to sheath himself in her again, because now they had each other for all eternity.

When it became too much, he pushed her back so she released him and knelt in front of her. He kissed her again and leaned into her, forcing her to lie down and covering her with his body. She moaned softly into his mouth and then rolled with him, so she was on top, and straddled his hips.

He groaned and ran his hands up her thighs. She looked beautiful sitting on him, confidence sparkling in her eyes, her body bare and open to him.

She had tricked him again as it was him on the ground, not Ianto.

Yan smiled and traced patterns on his chest with her fingertips, teasing his nipples. She ran them down towards his hips, drawing his attention there. Her warm heat covered his cock, trapping it between their bodies. He rubbed against her, thrusting slowly, enjoying the feel of her astride him. Her eyes slipped shut and she leaned her head back. She moaned and it was too much. He had to be inside her again when she did that, wanted her to ride him just as he had been aching for her to all damned day.

Her fingertips grazed the lines of his hips, ran around his navel and then up the valley between his abdominals. His gaze remained fixed on her face, absorbing the way she watched her fingers with hungry eyes. She splayed her hands out and swept them over his chest, her teeth tugging her lower lip at the same time, and then leaned over him.

Jack closed his eyes when her bare breasts brushed his stomach and slid his hands down her sides to her bottom. She ran her fingers into his dark hair and brought her elbows to rest either side of his head. Her warm mouth found his, tongue sliding between his lips, and he moaned as she kissed him. It was slow and sweet, calming his urge to be inside her. When she kissed him like this, he could wait forever.

It stole his attention and his heart. Always.

He frowned when she moved away, kissing down his jaw and then his neck, over his chest. Her tongue swirled around his left nipple and then she sat back on him again, running her fingers over his body, her gaze following them.

She smiled wickedly and wriggled, tearing a groan from his throat as her warm heat enveloped his cock again. He had to be inside her now. Taking hold of her hips, he raised her. His erection sprang up, hard and eager, and he positioned it beneath her. He moaned when she sank down onto his length, easing back onto it, drawing it out. An exquisite torture. He held his hips steady, resisting the temptation to thrust himself deep into her welcoming body.

When he was all the way in, she wriggled on him, tearing another low groan from his throat, and then raised herself again.

Jack grasped her hips, guiding her on his cock and helping her as she slowly sank back onto him and rose again. He thrust up into her as she came down again, meeting her halfway, and steadily built the pace between them, until she was moaning with him each time their bodies met, his hard aching cock delving deep into her hot core.

He kept his eyes locked on her, raising her up and bringing her down, watching the myriad of emotions that crossed her face each time. She gasped when he plunged into her, moaned when he withdrew, her lips parted in ecstasy and her breasts bouncing.

She was divine. He would never tire of her. He would never leave her.

Her eyes met his and the world fell away. He lost track of their movements until he was just looking into her eyes and feeling everything that she was, filled with the way it felt to be as one with her, inside her, together. It awed him. Her beauty and how it felt to be with her awed him. Not just like this either. He had made her happy and eased her suffering, but she had done the same for him too. He was happy again at last, content and no longer alone, and he knew that she would never leave him.

He could feel her love pounding through her veins and through him, could sense the affection she held for him and that she wanted this to go on forever too. It was more than just being intimate with him, more than just lust. It was about being one with him, and sharing their love.

He loved her.

And she loved him.

Her heart beat with his, her hands pressing into his stomach as she moved on him, taking him deep into her body, joining them as one.

She was beautiful.

The stars behind her brightened, until they shone through the veil of light from the camp fire beyond the bushes, and twinkled. He sensed her power rising, calling to his own, entwining with it just as their bodies were. The night became a beautiful backdrop for Yan as she rode him, her eyes still locked with his. He took hold of her hands and pressed his palms to hers. The magic flowed into him, warming his fingers, and he let his power join with it.

A shooting star arced across the night sky above her, quickly followed by another.

She was making the night as beautiful as it should be...magical.

Jack stared deep into her sky blue eyes. Under her spell. Forever and always. Whether she knew it or not, she had cast a spell on him and he was powerless to break it. He didn't want to anyway. He wanted to be under her command when they were like this and just in life too. He wanted to be there to protect her, to make her smile, to give her happiness and everything that his angel deserved. Be it Yan or Ianto who reached for him, he knew he would always respond with this insatiable desire to protect.

She writhed on him, taking him higher until he was in heaven and flying with her.

Yan leaned forwards, so her long blonde waves curled around her breasts, hiding them from his hungry eyes. Her hands left his and she planted them against his chest. He took hold of her hips, raised her almost all the way off his cock and plunged into her again, bringing her down harder now. She cried out and dug her fingernails into his chest. He did it again, and again, pushing her higher, until he felt her body tensing. He wanted to be one with her completely, wanted to fall into bliss with her and hold her close until they had both come down. He moved her again, bringing her down onto his cock, and she flung her head back and shouted his name, her body convulsing around his.

Jack didn't stop. He moved her on his cock, delving deeper into her, his body tightening with each long thrust, bringing him closer to the edge. He closed his eyes, groaning each time he buried himself in her and her body clenched him, quivering against him, luring him towards bliss.

He wanted it.

With a deep, growling groan, he quickened his pace until it bordered on frantic, searching for release, his whole body coiled tight and ready to explode.

"Jack," Yan moaned and tensed her body around his, tipping him over the edge.

He plunged hard into her and came, his thrusts slowing until he was barely moving, his whole body shaking from his orgasm and the hazy bliss that ran through his veins.

Yan collapsed onto him, breathing fast, her heart thundering against his. He wrapped his arms around her and held her, and smiled when the blanket was pulled up and covered them.

He pressed a kiss to her forehead, savouring the feeling of her in his arms and her body against his.

Bliss.

Yan raised herself, her hands on his shoulders, and kissed him. He lazily returned the kiss, lost in her and thoughts of their future. He would fly with her every night like this, would sleep with her tucked safely in his arms, and would watch over her so she was never alone. He would be with her forever, just as she had commanded him to be, and he would never let her go. He would do anything to make her smile, no matter how foolish it made him look or how silly her request.

For once in long millennia, he was happy and he wasn't alone.

And what a divine creature she was, no matter what form she chose. She was the mother of his children, the keeper of his heart and the owner of his very soul.

Jack kissed her, slowing the tempo until they were drawing each one out, and held her close to him. He had waited for the Doctor, for a reason, for many long years and when it had finally come, it had given him more than just a task to fulfil.

It had given him Ianto.

His little Welsh rabbit.

His goddess.

And he would worship her forever.


End file.
